


Calling Adiona

by LtLime23



Series: Beyond the Archon [4]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy, Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Action, Adventure, Angst, Battle for the Citadel, F/F, Falling In Love, Heartbreak, Hurt, Journey to Andromeda, LGBTQ Character, Love Story, Original Plot, Science, Universe Crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-31
Updated: 2017-07-14
Packaged: 2018-11-07 10:15:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 54,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11056854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LtLime23/pseuds/LtLime23
Summary: The Milky Way watched the departing Arks drift to the size of distant stars before being lost completely to the waiting embrace of dark space.  Few within the Initiative knew of the terrors which marched towards the loved ones they'd left behind, Staff Lieutenant Robyn Harris must now complete the longest assignment in Alliance history.





	1. Welcome to ISSAC

**Author's Note:**

> Timeline:
> 
> Chapters 1-6: Lt. Robyn Harris & Suvi Anwar ME1 events from their point of view  
> Chapter 7: ME1 to ME:A crossover  
> Chapter 8+: Post critical path ME:A set in the 'Beyond the Archon' series universe

Suvi Anwar quietly begged for the thumping in her temple to ease, she pulled a discarded pillow over her head, letting the cool weight block out the world around her, she stayed like this until she could no longer stand the smell of her own breath in her face, the stale stench of too much whiskey causing her stomach to twist in protest.  
  
Why did she go out last night? She scolded herself, this was the beginning of her second PhD and her fourth time starting at a new university, she didn’t need to do the whole ‘freshers’ thing, the Scot allowed herself a wry smile, old habits die hard.

Wrapping herself in a robe she padded into the kitchen of her new abode in search of tea. As the kettle boiled Suvi leant back against the counter and surveyed her surroundings. The apartment which she’d be sharing with one other student was plush, more like an upmarket hotel than student halls. The open plan L-shaped living space contained the kitchen, two comfy sofas set around a small coffee table and vid screen. Around the corner was a spacious work area with two desks and info boards above each, the floor to ceiling window at the end flooded the workspace with light and a dramatic view across the city scape.

The two bedrooms which led off from the kitchen were identically furnished, the double beds comfy and wardrobe space adequate, individual en-suites meant there wouldn’t be any arguments in the morning.

Suvi smiled as she sipped her tea, the comforting warmth a welcome addition to her hands and a quenching relief from the malt dust which clung to her mouth. She let the familiar thrill of excitement build from her toes, shimmy up her legs and come to rest in the pit of her belly. I’m such a dork she thought. The anticipation of the scientific journey she was about to embark on filled her with anticipation, what new discoveries lay on her horizon.

After her previous doctorate in microbiology Suvi had decided to return to her first love, discovering the unknown and reaching for the stars, her parents had encouraged her to apply for a berth at this research facility, who needs a real job they’d said, when you can live frugally on the frontier of science?

ISSAC – the Inter-Species Scientific Advancement Centre was a hub of forward thinking; the aim of the centre was to allow academics from across Citadel space to put forward research proposals. A consortium of universities and private businesses would then sponsor those of interest, it meant that lone wolves who weren’t married to an institution had the opportunity to further their area of expertise without the politics. It also presented a unique opportunity for businesses to support ‘alternative’ research methods without any unwanted public attention, a high proportion of the research engaged at ISSAC concerned ballistics, munitions and microbiological weaponization.

Suvi however, had been awarded funding from the University of Serrice & Imperial College London to quantify the differences in efficiency of photovoltaic panels depending upon the wavelength of the photon and atmospheric conditions it passed through. A recent deployment of panels developed by the University of Serrice had found varying degrees of performance depending upon planet location, Suvi postulated that a thin layer of a particular gas on the surface of the panel could improve efficiency considerably.

Draining her mug the young scientist headed towards the shower, officially she didn’t start until tomorrow when she’d be allowed access to her lab space, today she planned to finish unpacking her belongings and learn her way around the rest of the campus, rather than just knowing how to find the bar.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Staff Lieutenant Robyn Harris unloaded her things from the skycar outside the ISSAC residential blocks, her military training had honed her skills to pack light but she was starting to wonder if she’d underestimated what she’d need for the next two years. Looking around at the crowd of people milling around they were all carrying much larger cargo crates than her own offering of a rucksack and a single supply box.

Walking across the landscaping in front of the towering block in front of her the feelings of apprehension that she’d been trying to keep under control threatened to spill over, this was a choice she reminded herself. 

Entering the main reception Robyn surveyed the room, despite her limited field deployment scoping any space she entered was still second nature to her. The combat boots she wore, although they looked heavy, could walk silently across any space, even the cold polished marble of the central atrium. Her eyes cast upwards noting the multiple balconied walkways which climbed overhead, luscious foliage tumbled down the supporting columns giving the whole space a garden like feel. The air smelt like damp earth after summer rain, it reminded her of home, if only it were a little closer to the sea.

“Welcome to ISSAC, are you here to check in?” the young Asari maiden manning reception stood up to greet Robyn as she made her way towards the desk.  
“Hi, yes, I’ve already been to the main facility to finalise all the paperwork, I’ve got my I.D.” shhh, she chastened herself, Robyn always found herself skittish in the civilian world, she hated to put anyone out and wanted to make a good first impression.

The asari smiled kindly, this residence was reserved for first time ISSAC academics, she was used to dealing with newbies, taking the proffered ID card, she scanned the list of names on her terminal screen.

After a few moments, she looked up and activated her Omni tool “yup, this all checks out, sending you the security code for your residence, your roommate has already arrived, take the elevator to the top floor, 2nd door on the left.”

Robyn fired up her own omni tool and double checked she’d received the codes “thanks for your help” she said smiling.

“No problem, if you need anything just ask Lieutenant.”

Robyn couldn’t suppress the sheepish grin at having the maiden use her rank, she quickly gathered up her belongings before she started to blush.

The lift to the 27th storey was swift and smooth, Robyn marvelled as Illium fell away from her feet, thinking it was a good job she didn’t have a problem with heights otherwise this could be a very uncomfortable stay. Exiting she noted only four doors off the corridor, thankfully this walkway wasn’t open to the atrium, even aliens had some respect for health and safety.

Approaching the door as directed the touch pad lock turned green as she neared, her mouth fell open as she surveyed her new home, having spent the last six years either aboard cruisers or military research stations she couldn’t remember the last time she’d stepped foot into somewhere so utterly _luxurious._

She didn’t protest as her legs strode towards the work area and the city scape framed in the magnificent window, she placed her crate on one of the desks and just absorbed everything she was seeing. The towering spires of the business district to the North, their twisted architecture flowing upwards like a stalagmite, or was it stalactite, Robyn could never remember. Skycars weaved like toys below, the occupants not once wondering who might be looking down, observing their journey. In the distance, she could make out the rolling foothills which precluded the mountain range beyond, not your jagged peaks like a child’s drawing these flowed like the rest of Illium as if a giant ridge of toothpaste had been squeezed out, the folds of deep red igneous stone a stark contrast to the greys, blues and purples of the city.  
  
Clouds to the South threatened rain, the light wisps scooting across the sky only the high-level bastions to the towering grey textures which were already enveloping the residential districts in a haze of graphite, the outpouring pulling the base of the cloud as if the very ground were sucking the drops from the atmosphere, yearning to drench the streets below.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi had dressed and was towelling her hair when she heard footsteps outside. She hadn’t exactly been dreading this part but institutional accommodation always meant running the gauntlet of crazy. Despite being asked to fill out pages of surveys gathering data on likes, dislikes, hobbies and backgrounds she was sure university admissions staff just matched you at random. During her masters studies Suvi had had to request a transfer due to a particularly unpleasant roommate who started to take their studies into primitive species cannibalistic behaviours a little too seriously.

She sighed and tried to take comfort in the thought; if they don’t want to eat me it’ll be fine.

Tossing the towel on the bed she walked into the lounge, maybe she’d been mistaken, the room was silent, no bags by the door. Then she noted the shadow that was being drawn out across the floor, leaning on the corner she silently studied the woman lost in the vista before her.

Her roommate was about 5ft 7, a good height Suvi concluded, slim, although the scientist got the impression her slight stature masked her physical strength, the way she stood, confident but not cocky, calm, relaxed but in a state of readiness. The cropped, scruffy jet black hair reflected the changing light, highlighting the textured mess, it sat beautifully against the tan skin, only visible on the hands and head of her subject. The rest was covered in a leather jacket, washed out grey jeans, which fitted in just the right places, Suvi noted, and combat boots. Not the heavy clod-hoppers soldiers wore, these were elegant like their wearer, tough but understated.

“It’s a fantastic view” a gentle husky whisper broke the silence, Suvi snapped her head up to the speaker, she could feel the heat rising in her neck… That accent she thought, British but different. She caught herself before the pause became uncomfortable, she’d definitely been enjoying the view.

“Aye, what did we do to get the penthouse?”

Robyn couldn’t contain the smile which broke across her face, Suvi tried not to melt at the sight, “a spectacular view and a Scot for a roommate I must be in heaven.”

This time Suvi blushed.

Robyn stepped forward, she hadn’t meant to flirt with her roommate but she did have a soft spot for a honey smooth Gaelic twang. Offering a hand to the now blushing woman in front of her “Hey, I’m Harris, sorry Robyn… Robyn Harris” she kicked herself for not being able to let go of the military trend of last names only.

“Dr. Suvi Anwar” Suvi shook the other woman’s hand, feeling herself cringe at the formality.

Robyn chuckled “well if we’re doing titles Dr. Anwar I’m Staff Lieutenant Robyn Harris, and it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Suvi raised an eyebrow, “Alliance?” 

“Yeah, well kindof, it’s complicated” she didn’t want to get into the nitty gritty in their first conversation “fancy giving me the tour?”  
Suvi sprang into action “oh yes, sure, although I’ve barely unpacked and who knows what’s hidden in this place it’s huge.”  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi gently closed her bedroom door, turning to lean back against it, she let out the air that had been sitting at the bottom of her lungs, unable to escape with her shallow breathing. She shook her head and cursed at behaving like such a teenager. After showing Robyn around the living areas various features she’d taken her new acquaintance to her room.

Suvi cringed as she remembered her tongue sticking to the roof of her mouth when Robyn had shrugged off her jacket, the white compression top she wore beneath, the Alliance engineering corp logo printed in navy blue down the centre left very little to the Scot’s, by now, over active imagination.

“Those arms” she muttered under her breath, her eyes had been transfixed by the slight bulge of Robyn’s bicep as she flexed picking up her rucksack and placing it on her chest of draws. The contrast of her skin against the bright white sleeve doing nothing but ensuring the image became etched in Suvi Anwar’s mind.


	2. Language of God

Robyn jogged across the room to open the door for the waiting delivery guy. “Just on the counter will be fine, thanks” she waved in the direction of the kitchen whilst stepping back out of his way. Transferring a few extra credits via her omni-tool as a tip. He gave a curt nod and as much of a smile as a Turian can manage.

“You’re welcome ma’am.”

The Lieutenant unpacked her groceries, finding homes for all her purchases, this bit was always weird, setting up your new living arrangements, make a mistake now and you’ll be irritated by it for months she mused.

She stared at her shopping trying to figure out what to have for lunch, well early dinner truth be told, she was exhausted from the day’s travel and wanted nothing more than to eat and curl up in bed. Tomorrow would be hectic finding her workspace and getting all her systems set up. Exciting too, this project could literally change the course of humanity, the odds of success were not in her favour, Robyn doubted she’d make any progress but when her previous project ended the Alliance were only offering grunt work or this, it had been an easy choice, even if the Lieutenant had concerns about where her funding was coming from.

“Can I tempt you with some lunch Dr. Anwar?” She called, Suvi had been unpacking her mountain of books, as well as populating her info board with research notes.

“Oh, erm, are you sure?” She replied nervously, popping her head around the corner.

“Absolutely, I made enough for two, you can’t refuse, rhetorical question really.”  
Suvi laughed “I can go with that” she put the books she was holding down and pulled up a seat at the breakfast bar, come to think of it whatever was cooking smelt amazing and she ravenous now her hangover had faded.

“Okay I lied” Robyn admitted, “there are conditions to lunch.”

Suvi raised an eyebrow “which are?”

“We need to do the whole getting to know each other things so you have ten questions to ask me anything, but you have to answer the same question too.” Robyn hated ice breakers but also hated awkward silences even more, she prided herself on being able to develop a rapport with her colleagues, taking an officers commission had taught her a lot about people management and maintaining positive relationships.

“I can work with those terms” replied Suvi “let’s start easy, I obviously have Scottish heritage but I can’t place your accent?”

“I grew up in Cornwall” Robyn smiled, people never could guess where she’d been born.

“Ah! Clearly, I’m not Alliance, both my parents are scientists and I’ve basically been an academic my whole life, I’m intrigued as to how you’ve ended up at one of the most prestigious research facilities in the galaxy?”

“I’m hurt” Robyn mocked taking a dagger to the heart “you cut me deep Anwar not all soldiers have fluff between their ears” she made sure to keep her tone light so Suvi knew she hadn’t really taken offence.

“My Dad is a high school physics teacher and my Mum works as a nurse, Cornwall is still the back and beyond and joining the Alliance was really my only option if I wanted to study. I did a degree in physics whilst doing basic training and was selected for officer fast track, this was mainly so the navy could justify continuing my studies…. Plus, my other abilities.” 

Robyn carefully directed a ball of dark energy towards the olive oil bottle on the side, she gently pulled it to her hand before drizzling her salad with the content.

“Impressive party trick” Suvi said through a mouth full of lettuce.

Robyn continued, “I did an MSc in FTL propulsion drives. For the last 3 years, I’ve been working on a joint venture between the Alliance and Turian military, with that project closing earlier this year I was at a loose end, luckily some folk with money saw enough potential in something I’d been working on behind the scenes to land me a bunk here.”

“I get the impression that if I ask you what you’re researching I won’t get an answer?” Suvi ventured.

Robyn shifted slightly in her seat under the scrutiny, “pretty much, all I can say is that I headed up the previous project because of my master’s dissertation, I reverse engineered some Prothean tech which made that project possible, this work is in a similar vein but, er, a much more complex system.”

“And is it being backed by the Alliance?” 

Further squirming from Robyn as she chose her words carefully “not exactly, I’m still on the Alliance payroll and if they ask me to jump I still say, ‘how high’, however, the financial backing is not from the Alliance. They support the work but if I’m successful this would benefit all galactic races and nobody really wants to ‘own’ that if that makes sense.”

“If other races found out you were reverse engineering something Prothean, they might question the motivation, is this another attempt at humanity trying to gain an edge” Suvi pondered.

“Exactly, what I’m working on is so intrinsic to our existence that it would be a political hot potato if people found out that the Alliance were backing the research. All I know is that I’m sponsored by two private entities one is a cross species venture of some kind and the other, well I know very little. I did a little digging but could only trace the money as far as Thessia.”

“Sounds a bit cloak and dagger but then a lot of what goes on at ISSAC falls into grey areas doesn’t it?” Suvi gave Robyn a sideways smile “Do I… need to watch your back?” 

Robyn puffed out her cheeks “there’s always potential, information is king and I’m just one person, easy enough to take out, but I’ve taken precautions and I have undertaken some pretty advanced combat training, I’m no N7 but…” she met Suvi’s eye, returning the smile “I can hold my own.”  
\-------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi and Robyn had parted in the main lobby of the research hub, the central column housed all the admin and support staff, common areas and refectories, nine arms then splayed out, each home to a different area of research from xenobiology to planetary geology. Suvi wished Robyn a good day and headed towards the optics labs where her testing rig was waiting.

Robyn made her way to the lift between wings four and five, pressing the controls for the underdeck. Whilst the elevator in the residences provided an enjoyable trip this was a reinforced steel box, only big enough for two, the full body scan she underwent stepping inside would automatically seal her in if it detected an unauthorised weapon or DNA signature.

Stepping into the bare concrete corridor she moved carefully, aware of the vibrations ricocheting around her. Reaching the security door to her lab Robyn presented her hand to the biometric scanner before keying in the twenty-three-digit security code.

Robyn closed her eyes as the door slid shut behind her and allowed the silence of the room to settle her. The space was exactly three metres by three metres, the entrance stood in the centre of one wall. To the right was a floor to ceiling rotating blackboard. Where they’d acquired such a prehistoric piece of furniture she was unsure but this had been a very specific request from the Lieutenant. It wasn’t that Robyn loved using antiquated equipment, although she did love to pretend she was one of the founding fathers of science, a Eureka! moment just around the corner, no, this had been installed for security. 

Datapads and OSDs are easily lost or stolen, with chalk she could map and remap her thoughts, theories and equations without fear of them being found. With six layers of security to enter this space, one requiring her to have a pulse she knew her chalk based musings would be safe from prying eyes.

A narrow bench ran the full length of the wall to her left, although empty now it would eventually carry the scale models and test rigs, assuming she managed to succeed in her efforts of reverse engineering.

Mounted to the ceiling was a 3D holoprojector, the only white light fell on the blackboard the rest of the room was bathed in an even blue light allowing the projected schematics to be easily read.

A small desk lay directly in front, a stack of supply crates with ordered materials lay waiting, Robyn reached for the smallest case, the weight heavy in her hands, the Salarian Union motif laser etched into the metal casing. She carefully released the catches, lifting the lid to find two tiny cylinders, each one had a bright blue core rotating lazily. Robyn couldn’t hazard at how much these had cost, micro eezo cores, specially produced to her exacting specifications.

She snapped the lid shut and smiled “let the science begin.”  
\--------------------------------------------------------------  
The pair of scientists occupying the second door on the left of the top floor of the ISSAC residences fell into a comfortably routine as the weeks went on. Robyn would rise early and work until early afternoon, following lunch she’d either run or hit the gym, her Alliance credentials requiring her to stay in peak conditions, after dinner she’d settle on one of the sofas to read all the latest reports and developments in her field, still trying to gather any elements of research which might be useful.

Despite her best efforts Suvi refused to join Robyn in any form of exercise the Scot preferred to keep more office based hours in her optics lab. She’d return in time for the pair to make dinner together and whilst Robyn read Suvi would type up her notes from the day’s experiments.

“Anwar, come walk with me?” Robyn called, in the vague direction of her roommate, it was early evening and she’d hit a brick wall, the past six months of work had gotten her nowhere and she was starting to think this whole thing was impossible.

Suvi was oblivious, earbuds in whilst she worked.

Robyn let the warm blue of her biotics envelope a cushion and gently nudged the Scot in the side of the head, Suvi trying, unsuccessfully to beat it away only adding to the playfulness of the gesture. 

Giving in Suvi took out her earbuds “Do you know we’ve got a human Spectre?” she asked.

Robyn looked at her quizzically as she let the cushion land neatly on the sofa again, “err, have you been living under a rock? Kinda old news”

“Well until I started living with a marine I’d never paid much attention, but you can’t escape Commander Jane Shepard, she’s all over the newsfeeds, Noveria, Feros, Eden Prime.”

“Yeah, rumour has it she’s pursuing another Spectre who attacked the colony on Eden Prime, nothing’s confirmed though, even my Alliance briefings have conflicting intel.” 

“Oooh, how exciting” Suvi exclaimed. Robyn shifted uncomfortably, turning away, her jaw set and she could feel the small muscle under her ear begin to pulse. Suvi held her hand to her mouth, looking wide eyed at the Lieutenant “Robyn I’m so sorry, me and my big mouth, I just got sucked into the sensationalist tabloid junk.”

Suvi crossed the room, landing heavily on the sofa next to her roommate, “I didn’t mean any disrespect, I know you do what you do to protect our freedom and sometimes you make the ultimate sacrifice…. sorry.” She looked down at her hands which had suddenly become very engaged with fiddling with the hem of her sleeves.

Robyn swallowed the flash of hurt that had crippled her jaw “it’s okay” she said, finally, “I try not to read the newsfeeds, they romanticise the whole idea of the navy and what it is to serve. A lot of colonists and Alliance personnel died on Eden Prime… some I knew personally.” She tried to keep her voice level but it always hurt to talk about death, every marine dreaded civilian casualty, protecting, that was her one job after all.

Suvi placed a comforting hand on the Lieutenants back, letting it travel upwards and come to rest on the curve of Robyn’s shoulder. “I’m sorry, I had no idea, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Robyn turned to face her, the marine’s grey blue eyes meeting the Scots own, she let a wry smile play at her lips “don’t worry about it, how were you to know? Soldiers don’t talk about their own mortality” she sighed letting the tension fall from her body “come on, I need some fresh air and someone to talk to about my current scientific constipation.”  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------  
“A walk round the park?” Robyn asked, before she could think any better of it she offered Suvi her arm.

“Sounds good” Suvi replied, she slipped her arm through the Lieutenants as they fell in step, walking along the crushed gravel paths which marched through the immaculate ornamental gardens of the Illium parkland. 

“So, scientific constipation eh, sounds serious” Suvi gently nudged the shoulder next to her.

“I just don’t get it” Robyn couldn’t help but laugh at her own predicament “I’m missing something and I can’t place what it is, I expected this would be harder, well more complex, but it’s like it isn’t even Prothean.” Robyn had become more animated as she spoke.

Suvi stopped and turned Robyn to face her, “Okay, let’s be logical, start from the beginning.”

“Right, well I’ve got the hardware figured out, other people had already done that, what I’m working on is the coding and the communication within the tech, understanding exactly ‘how’ it works.” Robyn had stepped away from Suvi who sat down on a stone bench to watch as the Lieutenant started pacing, she couldn’t help but notice the cute furrow Robyn got between her eyebrows when she was thinking.

“Coding is like speech, the actual words only mean so much it’s the spaces, gaps, tone and inflection, the expectant pauses, heavy with anticipation, the rhythm of the syllables rolling off your tongue which communicate so much more. Prothean tech has that flow, it’s elegant, complex but also incredibly simple once you know what you’re looking for, the stealth drive practically unravelled itself once I’d figured out which thread to pull.” Robyn was on a roll when Suvi cut across her.

“Hold on, did you say stealth drive?” Suvi exclaimed, she’d been lost in Robyn’s voice, her quiet, passionate tone was like a furry jacket for her ears, but stealth got her attention. 

Robyn had stopped pacing, she hadn’t meant to let that slip.

“Your last project, it was Shepard’s ship, what’s it called?” Suvi faltered.

“The Normandy” Robyn offered.

“You built the Normandy” it was a statement more than a question “have you been holding out on me Lieutenant Harris? You’re a big deal, aren’t you?” Suvi said, only half teasingly.

Robyn rubbed the back of her neck “Lots of people built the Normandy, I just led the team that did a small part of it.”

“A small part of it! You mean the small part being the USP of the whole bloody project?”

Robyn shook her head “okay, okay” she held up her hands “but back to my original point, the thing I’m working on now, it doesn’t have the poetry of ‘Prothean’ it grates and is all hard edges, it doesn’t have the same… _emotion_. The whole thing is hurting my head because if it isn’t Prothean..”

“Then who built it” breathed Suvi, standing up to face Robyn.

“Exactly. Can I tell you one of the reasons I studied Physics?”

Suvi nodded, her hands, as if drawn by some unknown force drifted towards Robyn’s, who caught them in her own.

“When you master Physics you are deciphering the very language of God, to be able to hold such understanding, it makes me feel less alone in the universe. But how often do we miscommunicate? Someone, somewhere could discover new meaning in the prose and everything we knew to be true yesterday could be disproved today. Those moments excite and terrify me in equal measure and I feel like I’m on the cusp of one of those turning points.” Robyn’s voice was barely more than a whisper. The pair stood totally alone in the stillness of the descending twilight.

Suvi didn’t know what to say, she’d stood rapt, fully absorbed in Robyn, the passion with which she spoke reducing Suvi’s awareness of the outside world, her sole focus shrinking to the very spot they occupied, the touch of fingers entwined, the dawning realisation that she could fall in love with the beautiful mind before her.

Suvi lowered her head slightly, not yet ready to search Robyn’s gaze for a reply. She felt the other woman’s forehead gently meet her own.

“This is one of those ‘expectant pauses’ isn’t it” Suvi breathed.

“It feels like it” the reply catching in Robyn’s throat.

Suvi lifted her head and found Robyn’s lips waiting for her own.


	3. Impeccable Timing

Suvi could feel the day catching up with her, the fog which dulled her mind and made the backs of her eyes hurt always arrived after long hours of intense concentration. Her research was on schedule and going as planned, the results were only confirming her suspicions but there were always more tests to run. 

The view out the elevator matched her mood, the low cloud and driving rain shrouded the city, only the brightest lights penetrating the grey. The fading light simply adding to the depressing winter that had enveloped the city over the past few weeks.

With this in mind, she could be excused for not quite believing the sight that met her as she entered the apartment. Stacks and stacks of archive crates filled the living space, piled on every surface five crates high and at least four deep.

“Oh. My. Days. Robyn what _is_ this?” She spread her hands, eyes wide and slack jawed at the carnage that filled her home.

Robyn stood in a small square of space where their coffee table used to be, she was wearing nothing but a pair of shorts and a hoodie, she rubbed the back of her neck nervously.  
“Erm, this?” Robyn croaked.

“Yes Robyn, this, or haven’t you noticed the, what, three hundred or so crates that have taken the place of our furniture?” Suvi’s tone was disbelieving, she wasn’t angry or upset, more bemused by the turn of events.

“Three hundred and thirty-eight, to be precise” Suvi raised an eyebrow, Robyn quickly continued “this is every piece of academic literature written about the Prothean extinction, my lab is smaller than my bathroom so they had to come here, but most of them will be gone in a couple of days, I’m pretty good at sifting the wheat from the chaff” Robyn’s words tumbled out of her as she got more and more nervous, concerned that Suvi would shortly go crazy at her for literally filling their home with boxes.

Suvi picked her way towards Robyn, she couldn’t help but grin as her girlfriend got more and more flustered.  
“Calm down” she giggled, reaching up to weave her fingers into Robyn’s hair, she pulled her down for a kiss. “I don’t mind that you’ve created chaos in our living room” she paused for another kiss “besides” she paused “I bet you’ve alphabetised them.” Robyn blushed, Suvi just laughed “you are adorable Lieutenant.”  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------  
True to her word Robyn completed her first sweep of the documents in two days, a disgruntled porter would arrive every few hours to remove the boxes of ‘chaff’. 

“I don’t know how some of this gets published” Robyn muttered, Suvi had just returned from her day at optics, she stood against the kitchen counter surveying the world over the rim of a steaming mug of tea.  
“When I think about how hard I had to work to submit an abstract to some shitty journal back on Earth” she sighed.  
“Quality not what you expected Ro?” Suvi quipped.

Robyn laughed “seriously, do you know how much of this” she gestured to the remaining boxes “turns out to just be a stream of nonsensical drivel written by a fucking jellyfish?”

Suvi nearly spat out her tea “Robyn!” she exclaimed “you can’t say that, for all you know that jellyfish might be the leading expert in Enkindler civilisation”  
“I doubt that very much” Robyn said flatly.

Suvi nodded towards a large stack of datapads on Robyn’s desk “what’s that pile?”  
“That’s ‘T’, mainly the works of a Dr Liara T’Soni, Asari, I’ve had a quick scan, it looks interesting but given she’s only about one hundred I’m not sure how helpful it’ll be.”  
“So, you hate jellyfish and are ageist, I’m learning a lot about you this evening” Suvi joked.  
“That’s not what I meant! One hundred is like early twenties in human terms, how many humans do ground-breaking stuff in their twenties?”  
“You did” Suvi said pointed.  
Robyn signed “point taken.”

They grinned at one another, Robyn moved through the debris of her days reading. “Enough” she said as she came to stand in front of Suvi, carefully taking the tea from her hands and placing it on the side, Robyn let her hands rest lazily on the Scot’s hips “a beautiful woman has come back from a hard day of science-ing and I haven’t even asked how you are?”

Suvi ran her hands up Robyn’s arms and let her own drape over the other woman’s shoulders, her fingers playing with the short hair at the base of Robyn’s neck.  
She smiled, “oh my day’s been dull in comparison, not a jellyfish to be seen.”  
“Well I’m more than happy to share” Robyn joked.  
“Keep your jellyfish, you offer something far more interesting” Suvi’s voice was barely more than a whisper, she felt Robyn shift her weight pulling their bodies closer, their kiss was deep, slow and sensual. Suvi felt her body betray her wanting, unable to supress the gasp as Robyn took her bottom lip between her teeth.

Robyn pulled back just enough to break the kiss “you okay with this?” They’d talked about this, about the progression of their physical relationship, both had agreed there was no rush and they’d rather take it slow, make sure they were certain of one another first.

“Don’t you dare stop” Suvi replied before pulling Robyn back to her waiting mouth.  
Robyn ducked to her lover’s neck, dragging the tip of her tongue down the length before placing a gentle bite at the base. Suvi gasped, feeling her heart race and her arousal spike, she pulled at Robyn’s shirt, their actions becoming more frantic with need.

Suvi gently pushed Robyn backwards, guiding them towards her bedroom, she pulled off her own shirt en-route, pulling the Lieutenant into her once she kicked the bedroom door shut. Hot skin on skin, how many times had she thought about what lay beneath Robyn’s clothes.

The Scot nudge Robyn onto her bed, savouring the sight of firm breasts encased in a black bra, softly defined abs under her tawny skin simply begging to be kissed. Suvi knelt down, threading her fingers through Robyn’s belt loops she started to lay a trace of gentle kisses over that beautiful stomach. As she started to drift lower with her kisses Suvi’s hands moved to undo Robyn’s belt, she let her teeth catch the waistband of the Lieutenant’s underwear as her fingers released the top button.

“Suvi” Robyn moaned “stop” she breathed, the words lost in the gasp of pleasure as Suvi grazed her teeth over Robyn’s hipbone.  
With a little more urgency “Seriously Suvi, you need to stop.”  
Suvi snapped her head up in concern.  
“Your Mum’s calling” Robyn stated, the personal terminal Suvi kept in her room was flashing with an incoming video message.  
Suvi groaned “impeccable timing.”  
“Take it” Robyn said kindly “you can’t ignore your Mother.”

Suvi sighed accepting defeat, standing up, she pulled on a t-shirt off the floor and was just greeting her Mother as Robyn slipped out of her room, closing the door gently behind her.  
\------------------------------------------------------------  
The call came at 5AM local time, Robyn’s omni tool buzzing aggressively as its wearer tried to sleep, blearily the Lieutenant attempted to focus but her brain not yet fully functioning.

_Urgent Transmission_  
_Staff Lt. R Harris_  
_Immediate redeployment. SSV Normandy grounded emergency works required.  
_Shuttle pick-up 0600 local – transit to Citadel secured via SSV Caledonia._ _

__

Robyn swore as she threw herself out of bed, her legs tangled in the sheets causing her to stumble, sending a stack of datapads crashing to the floor as she tried to steady herself.  
After the briefest of showers, she pulled the supply crate from under her bed, the only box she’d brought with her to ISSAC contained her the Alliance side of her life, uniforms, credentials and sidearm.

As she pulled on her uniform Robyn careered around the apartment trying to pack a bag.

“Robyn what is going on?” Suvi appeared sleepily from her room.  
“I’m being picked up in less than an hour, I’m needed on the Citadel to carry out emergency repairs on the Normandy.” Robyn zipped up her bag and dropped it on the work surface.

“Do you know when you’ll be back?” Suvi called to the retreating back of her girlfriend, she followed her into her room and leaned against the door jam, watching as Robyn sifted through a cargo crate.

“No idea, hopefully no more than a few days but I really don’t know” Robyn kneeled to tie up her boots, before standing to deal with the rest of her uniform, whilst she’d managed to put it on she looked anything but the spotless vision of an Alliance officer.

“Hey, come here, you’re making it look worse rather than better.” Suvi stepped forward, straightening the Lieutenants shirt, she carefully tucked it in, buttoned her trousers and buckled the belt.

“I’ve never seen you in uniform before” Suvi whispered “it makes you look rather fetching” she teased, trying to stay light-hearted when her mind was reeling.  
Robyn smiled, she rolled up and buttoned the sleeves “I can wear it more often if you like” she flashed Suvi a smile she knew would melt. Turning slightly Robyn grabbed her pistol and secured it to the holster.

“It’s odd, I’ve known from day one you were a marine but it never once crossed my mind you’d have a gun” Suvi’s voice was small, uncertain in this new territory.  
“I’m glad you just see Robyn the physicist Suvi, it’s nice to be with someone who doesn’t ask me what my kill count is.”  
Suvi’s eyes widened “It’s never crossed my mind… ”  
Robyn leant forward to place a soft kiss on Suvi’s lips “Good.”  
Suvi shook herself, “give me five minutes I’ll walk you to the shuttle.”

Robyn was waiting by the doorway when Suvi reappeared, there was a hesitance between the two women, uncertainty lay in their futures and this rude awakening was the first step along a road neither held a map for.  
“Suvi” Robyn paused “can we… can we say goodbye here, things will be different at the shuttle, I’ll be different.”  
Suvi pulled Robyn into a loving kiss, desperate to hold onto the feeling of her body safely wrapped up in Robyn’s strong arms.  
“Come back safe” she whispered pulling away.  
Robyn nodded “I will.”  
Robyn swung her bag over her shoulder and finally placed her beret on, Suvi couldn’t help but smile as she saw this side of Robyn for the first time.

The pair walked towards the skycar lot on the edge of the campus, the waiting Alliance shuttle sticking out like an elephant at the ballet. The engines were still primed, doors open and two armed servicemen flanked the approach.

Suvi couldn’t help but gasp as she took stock of their assault rifles at close quarters, their lightweight armour adding to their imposing bulk. She noticed the subtle shift in Robyn, could almost feel the fortifications rise, she walked a little taller and looked a little broader, all her actions becoming crisp and efficient, jaw set.

The guards stood to attention and saluted “Good Morning Ma’am”  
Robyn halted her progress, heels locking together and returning the salute “Privates” she acknowledged curtly.  
Turning to Suvi her features momentarily softened “I’ll send you a message when I can.”  
“Stay safe” Suvi smiled, she folded her arms across her chest, resisting the urge to reach out for Robyn.  
“Dr. Anwar” Robyn nodded her goodbye.  
“Lieutenant” Suvi managed in response.

Robyn stepped into the shuttle not daring to look back, she felt the arrival of the two guards and the hiss and stomach dropping lurch as the doors sealed shut and the shuttle lifted from the ground.


	4. What's Coming?

As Lieutenant Harris stepped off the SSV Caledonia she took a long inhalation, held it for a moment before slowly releasing in a steady, composed exhalation. The Alliance docks were frantic with activity servicemen and women scuttled like ants between ships carrying cargo and completing repairs. It had been some time since Robyn had been surrounded by so many people and the commotion threatened to overwhelm her.

She checked her omni-tool, just enough time to nip ‘home’ she thought, before she had to report to the Normandy. Robyn wasn’t assigned to a ship which meant she was somewhat of a nomad within the Alliance, with the final Normandy build taking place in one of the Citadel’s shipyards she’d been allocated a room in the C-Sec barracks. Although room might be a slight exaggeration Robyn thought as she keyed in her passcode, closet was more accurate. The tiny space housed a simple bunk and a washbasin, a few hooks lined the wall but that was it, the industrial strip light only added to the sterile gloom of the space. How did I live here for 2 years? She thought.

Dropping her bag on the bed the Lieutenant started pulling out crates from under her bed, pleased to find all her belongings still in place. She tipped out the contents of one of the boxes and started filling it with what she’d need for the Normandy, tools, interface terminal and schematic OSDs, plus her spare set of fatigues and underwear. 

Packing complete she sat down on the bed trying to steady herself, pulling her mindset back into ‘Alliance mode’. Her omni-tool buzzed, Robyn opened her messages, she had three, one was from Marc Vaughan a good friend and Alliance Quartermaster, she smiled as she read his message, they’d shared some good times over the years, he had some new ‘toys’ for her as he put it, she quickly typed a reply saying she’d swing by.

The second message was from Captain Anderson, requesting she meet him at the Normandy docking bay for a briefing, Robyn acknowledge the request and confirmed her attendance following a brief detour to the QM for supplies.  
Robyn felt her stomach flutter as she saw the third message was from Suvi, she’d done her best to compartmentalise her feelings but the fact remained, she missed her terribly. 

_Hey R,_  
_I hope the journey was okay, it’s weird having the place to myself. Anyway, I just wanted to say ‘hello’._  
_I miss you,_  
_S x_

Robyn sighed, she’d spent the whole journey to the Citadel trying to refrain from sending a very similar message to Suvi, it wasn’t as if she had anything in particular to say, she just wanted to make that contact, to feel connected, to let the other woman know she was thinking about her. 

_Hey Suvi,_  
_Smooth jump to the Citadel, feeling a little overwhelmed by all the people and the lack of space. Returning to my old ‘quarters’ well let’s just say the luxury of Illium has made me realise what a hovel my Alliance accommodation is._

_I’ll be honest, because it’s easier to write than to say out loud… I miss you and I haven’t stopped thinking about you. I don’t know if you realise just how much you mean to me, we just fit together and it feels perfect. Hopefully I’ll be back soon._

_I’ve got to go, duty calls, I’ll make sure to write to you but the messages may come through in batches depending on comm restrictions, I still don’t know what I’m walking into._

_Ro xx_

Hitting ‘send’ Robyn gathered up her things and headed towards the QM’s depot.  
\----------------------------------------------------  
“Lt. Harris, it’s good to see you, here let me help you with that.” Captain Anderson’s voice always travelled, even if he whispered, hearing his tone always had a calming effect on the Lieutenant though, he radiated trust.

Robyn had been precariously balancing two containers one on top of the other, she hadn’t yet opened her present from the quartermaster but the size of the box alone had her excited, she was grateful when the Captain reached forward and took it from her. 

“Captain Anderson” she nodded.

Robyn glanced around the Normandy’s docking bay, in comparison to the rest of the Alliance docks this place was deserted. Her baby, she thought, that she’d spent over 3 years working on stood gleaming before her, sure there were a couple of scraps, but nothing a buff and polish couldn’t solve. This was the reason she’d joined the Alliance, as a little girl she’d been obsessed with space ships and galactic warfare. She’d studied all the famous aerial battles learning the tactics and strategies. Her parents thought she’d become a pilot but Robyn’s real talent was understanding how stuff worked and figuring out how to get performance gains, she’d spent hours tweaking the Normandy and having Joker pull all sorts of crazy manoeuvres just to get data on the telemetry tools.

“She’s still your baby Lieutenant” the Captain spoke, as if reading her thoughts.  
“She’s my greatest achievement Captain.” She meant it too, despite only a handful of individuals knowing the role she played in making this ship happen, all the sleepless nights and frantic meetings, having to smooth things over when one of her engineers upset the Turians, it was worth it because the Normandy was beautiful.  
She fixed the Captain with a quizzical look “what’s going on Captain? There’s no smoke pouring out of the portside and this whole place is deserted, the Captain of the Caledonia said the order to ground the Normandy had come from Udina?” 

Robyn watched the Captains shoulders sag slightly “Okay Lieutenant, firstly trust me when I say the less you know the better, what I’m about to ask you to do must go no further do you understand?”  
Robyn nodded “of course Sir.” 

“Good” Anderson confirmed “Commander Shepard is on a critical mission, Udina still thinks the world is flat and has put the Normandy on lockdown, the Alliance is helping to negotiate a lifting of the restrictions. There is no time to waste though so we need the Normandy to be powered up and ready to go.” Anderson gave her a ‘look’ his eyes twinkling “Do you think you can do that Lieutenant?” 

Robyn smiled, the lockdown would have been instigated by Citadel control once the docking clamps made contact and interfaced with the systems. There was a backdoor though, she’d made sure of it, Robyn liked to plan for all eventualities, like having to hack her own ship. 

“Would you help me carry my things to engineering Captain, I’d like to get to work.”  
“It would be my pleasure Lieutenant.”  
\---------------------------------------------  
Robyn stood alone in Engineering, Anderson had just left leaving her silently with her thoughts, the hum of the ships ventilation the only sound, the drive core which usually burned brightly stood dark and dormant. 

She pulled out her portable terminal and fired it up, perching on the stacked crates as she interfaced with the locked-out systems of the Normandy the familiar flutter of excitement started to spread through her body. She may not be the vision of a traditional soldier but give her a challenge, a time limit and some of the most complex military tech in the galaxy and Robyn couldn’t help but enjoy the adrenaline rush. 

As she started to progress her coding Engineer Adams and an unknown Quarian walked into engineering. 

“Adams!” Robyn exclaimed bounding upwards to shake the officers hand. 

“Ro! Anderson said you were here but I didn’t believe him, they pulled some serious strings to get you here I never thought you’d make it.” 

“Tell me about it? I got buzzed at 5AM, gave me an hour to pack up before I was pulled, now I’m here and err yeah being asked to do some shady shit” Robyn’s hand reached for her neck she automatically did it when she was unsure, she knew it was a tell.

“Yeah about that, I’m under strict instructions from the Captain and Commander not to ask you what you’re doing, ‘Don’t ask, Don’t tell’ all over again.” Adams was clearly uncertain about this but he had a glint in his eye. “However,” he continued “Lieutenant Harris, meet Tali, she’s an ace Quarian engineer and nothing to do with the Alliance so she’ll be asking the questions” he winked.

“Nice to meet you Tali” Robyn offered her hand to the young woman who took it and shook it firmly.

“Good to meet you too Lieutenant, Engineer Adams has a lot of good things to say about you and I’m intrigued to know more about how you built the Normandy” 

“All in good time, first I’ve got to open the backdoor” Robyn smiled and settled back down on her makeshift seat.

“A backdoor?” Tali enquired, Adams busied himself at his terminal but Robyn knew it was just for show and he’d be listening in with rapt attention. 

“So, when I developed the defence strategy for the Normandy I envisaged this situation occurring, Citadel control have the ship on lockdown via the docking clamps which connect to our systems. Now I don’t know all the details but I’ve been told we need to make a quick getaway which means we need to have this baby” Robyn gestured to the silent drive core behind her “up and running, ideally, I want to be able to activate the stealth systems immediately too, Citadel defences rely on sensor lock, there isn’t a manual optics mode for the big guns.” She paused, letting her fingers fly over the console, whilst it had been a while since she’d delved into the Normandy’s systems it didn’t take long to warm up and get into her groove.

“I wrote a program which will falsify the readings to Citadel control, to them it’ll look like nothing’s changed but I’ll then be able to start booting up systems, we’ll still have to be careful because I can’t alter any power readings so if we cause a spike in the juice they’ll know.” 

“Have you got a work around?” Tali asked, she had been sucked into Robyn’s animated explanation.

"Since I got here I’ve turned off some none essential systems which the Citadel won’t be monitor. I’m using the lithium stores in the hull which usually hold the heat from the engines when we’re running quiet, as batteries, storing the energy, so when we start firing systems up I can smooth out the peaks.” Robyn couldn’t help but smile. 

"I like you already” Tali laughed “you’ve thought of everything.” 

“I try my best” Robyn couldn’t help but flash a smile. 

Robyn worked steadily for an hour, balancing the supply and demand of the power systems as she started to take control of the Normandy’s major systems. A running commentary provided by Tali and Robyn’s back and forth questions, Adams standing quietly absorbing it all. “Okay, I think we’re ready” Robyn glanced nervously at the others, “I’m going to power up the core, and ignite the engines, let’s hope nobody looks out the window.” With a final few keystrokes the giant orb of the drive core powered into life, the initial high pitched hum gradually falling to a soft purr. “Yes!” Robyn hissed in triumph.  


_[Comms] Hey Adams, whatever you’re doing down there, my console just lit up like a Christmas tree._

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Joker, Lieutenant Harris might though.” 

_[Comms] Harris is here? No way! Ah shit, Shepard just got back, Harris you get your ass up here and say ‘hi’_

“Will do Jeff” Robyn chuckled “for now just focus on the controls, I have a feeling the docking clamps are suddenly going to go offline, as soon as they do we’re going dark and you’ll have the helm.” 

_[Comms] Robyn Harris saving the day!_

“Well I’m glad someone’s pleased to see me” Robyn muttered. With the drive core stable and engines primed all the Lieutenant could do was wait, as soon as the docking clamps released she’d quickly have to pull out of the Normandy’s systems to revert control to the crew. 

It was a subtle shift as the ship dropped ever so slightly as the clamps released their vacuum seal, Robyn activated the stealth systems and severed the connection, the ship immediately lurched as Joker took control pulling g’s to get away from the Citadel as quickly as possible. 

Robyn released the breath she’d been holding and calmly packed away her terminal, “I’ll be back soon, I’ve never had the chance to see the Normandy make a relay jump.” 

As the Lieutenant made her way through the cargo bay she nodded greetings to those aboard, she had no idea who the marine cleaning rifles was or why a Turian was tinkering with the mako or what a badass looking krogan was hanging around looking huffy for. 

Walking through the CIC none of the crew gave her a second look, just accepting her presence. Heading towards the cockpit Robyn spotted the silhouette of her former XO and an Asari, deep in conversation with Joker. 

As she approached Shepard turned towards her, Robyn immediately stood to attention and saluted.  
“At ease Lieutenant” Shepard’s tone was warm and friendly, Robyn couldn’t help but return her smile, it had been a long time since they’d seen each other “it’s good to see you, and thanks for getting us out of a hole, I know the brass pulled you off of Illium pretty sharpish.” 

“Yeah it was a rude awakening but it’s also good to be back on my baby.” 

“Your, baby?” the Asari questioned, speaking for the first time. 

“Liara, this is Lieutenant Robyn Harris, she’s responsible for some of the key features of the Normandy, she reverse engineered some Prothean tech as a research project which led to the advancement” the Asari had given Robyn a questioning look at the mention of the Protheans, an eyebrow marking raised, Shepard continued “Robyn, this is Dr Liara..” 

“T’Soni? The Prothean expert?” Robyn cut in. 

Both Shepard and Liara looked at her in surprise. 

“Well, yes.” Stumbled Liara. 

Robyn looked at them both, her mind reeling “Commander, can I speak with you and Dr T’Soni in private please?”  
“Sure, let’s go to the comms room, we’ve got about 6 hours before we hit the Mu Relay, sorry you’re coming along for the ride.”  
\---------------------------------------------  
Shepard and Liara took a seat in the comms room but Robyn couldn’t settle she started to pace. 

“Commander, are you aware of what I’m currently working on?” she asked.  
“I know you’re at ISSAC reverse engineering some more Prothean tech but that’s it” Shepard offered. 

“Right, Dr T’Soni” she couldn’t think of another way to approach this topic other than to be blunt, “the Citadel isn’t Prothean is it?”  
Liara and Shepard looked at each other, whatever they’d been expecting her to say it wasn’t that. 

“Why do you think that?” Liara asked, trying to keep her voice level. 

“I know Prothean tech inside and out, we hardly ever find anything complete, there is no clear reason for the demise of what appears to be one of the greatest galactic empires, there isn’t a single trace of their biological existence, no art, no culture, no clothing, no bodies, they were completely obliterated, erased from the face of the universe.” Robyn paused, she was finally voicing what had been troubling her for months, “yet your people, the Asari, just happened to find a fully functioning gigantic space station at the heart of the most advanced inter-system subway network?” 

“Additionally,” she continued “the tech of these systems, the very basis of their operation simply isn’t Prothean, granted it’s similar but it doesn’t have any of the hallmarks I’ve come to expect, if I were to hazard a guess, I’d say it predated the Protheans.” 

She sighed, letting the weight that she’d been carrying lift off her, Liara and Shepard sat in silence, neither of them sure what to say, so Robyn filled the void. 

“So, having read all your research and theories on cyclic extinction Dr. T’Soni, I suppose my question, for you both” she looked pointedly at the Commander “is why have I just had to hack the most advanced ship in the Alliance armada, to enable a Council Spectre to take a Prothean expert through the once lost Mu Relay to get to Ilos? What are you chasing, and what’s coming?” 

Carefully, Commander Shepard rose from her seat, she placed a hand on the Lieutenants shoulder, “You should sit down.” 


	5. Holes to Heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short one - but you'll understand why.

Somewhere in the galaxy Lieutenant Robyn Harris lay uncomfortably on the hard floor of the Normandy's engineering deck, the revelations of the past few hours having been accepted with cold, logical clarity, she'd deal with the fallout of those later, for now she focused on the task at hand and began to type.

Dear Suvi,

Well it turns out things are a little more complicated than I first envisaged. I'm still on the Normandy, and no doubt you'll be following the newsfeeds which say Shepard stole the ship. Don't believe everything you read, she didn't steal the ship.... I did.

Anyway, to cut a long story short I'm now attempting to get some sleep on the floor of engineering, before we make the jump through the Mu Relay. The Mu Relay was lost for thousands of years after a super nova went, well, nova and blasted it into a dense nebula. The Rachni rediscovered it, who knew space bugs would discover FTL quicker than humans.

It feels really strange to be here, the crew has been through a lot and I find myself feeling awkward that I'm intruding on their solemn final preparations. The thing is Suvi, what the Normandy is chasing is bad, like Vanguard of the destruction of the world bad.

I'd been hoping that this moment would be a little bit more romantic, work with me here. Come with me to some place beautiful, where we can feel at peace, a secluded beach at dawn? Maybe we stayed out all night, wrapped up in one another watching the debris of space burn up as it entered the atmosphere and wished upon each of them? We'd look at the most distant stars and wonder what worlds lay undiscovered, waiting for our stumbling scientific feet to fall over them.

You'd tell me how it doesn't matter where in the universe life takes us, if we remember that stars are still just the holes to heaven.

We'll fall asleep listening to the gentle ebb and flow of the ocean, its comforting rhythm keeping us safe in a world of dreams.

You'll wake up a little cold and burrow into me a little more, your palm on my chest feeling the thump of my heart. You'd nuzzle into my neck, the tip of your nose snuffled in just below my ear. I'd pull you closer still, and make sure the sleeping bag cocooned us both in a warm, fluffy embrace.

The morning air would be still, only small shivers of waves would be lapping at the shore. The horizon would be tinged with pink, gradually getting brighter as the first rays of sunlight cast long shadows over the waiting world.

You'll whisper how perfect this moment is and I'll turn my head to place a gentle kiss on your forehead, I won't pull away so you can feel the brush of my lips as I tell you I love you.

I'll be home soon, but just in case..... I needed you to know.

Love always,

Robyn x 

On the lake shore of the Illium parkland stands a small simple building, centuries of wisdom, hope and loss embedded in its walls. Suvi Anwar nods as she silently passes the presiding Matriarch, She does not wish to speak of what is troubling her, she does not seek the counsel of the mortal plain, for now she seeks comfort in the embrace of her God, for now she must pray.


	6. Whatever the Cost

“Thanks for the ride”  
“You’re welcome Lieutenant”

Robyn swung her bag over her shoulder and hopped off the hovering shuttle, waving a final goodbye to the Asari crew, she waited for the shuttle to make an about turn, its navigation lights fading in the inky black sky over Illium. She stood staring up at the ISACC residence block, walls gleaming, domineering with the dramatic lighting and sharp architecture. It was eighteen days since she’d left this place, and her world had been turned upside down in that time. 

The marine rested her forehead against the glass of the elevator and closed her eyes, letting the cool surface soothe the storm which raged between her temples. The flashes of memories, laser fire, the tails of torpedoes, plums of smoke and towering flames, swarms of geth fighters, and the harrowing torment of the Reaper. Robyn felt her heart spike and the sweat start to gather on her palms, as the lift came to a stop she steadies her breathing, focusing simply on the act of walking.

Silently entering the apartment, the clock in the kitchen reads 2:30AM, a lamp has been left on in the living room and Robyn suspects Suvi has done it deliberately so she wouldn’t come home to darkness. The familiar scent of home fills her nose and a little of the tension she’s been holding starts to ebb away. Everything is so familiar, yet different, Robyn questions if the change is in the surroundings or in herself, the horrors she has witnessed, pulling civilians from burning buildings in the wards, the taste of chard flesh and ash sticking to the back of her throat, lungs burning as hot air whipped at the rescue teams.

Slumping onto the couch Robyn put her head in her hands, and let the memories of chaos come, holding them back wouldn’t help her now.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
“All Alliance Officers report to the comms room” Shepard’s voice rang through the Normandy. Robyn and engineer Adams looked at one another.  
“Do you think she means me too?” Robyn asked.  
“I’d say” came his reply. The pair downed tools and headed to the elevator that would take them up to the CIC.

As they entered the meeting room and took their seats a shiver ran up the Lieutenant’s spin. The commander took her place as expectant silence fell across the room.  
“We will shortly be jumping through the Mu Relay and the ground team assault on Ilos will commence.” Shepard stated as a matter of fact, “The Normandy will stay in orbit as we pursue Saren. In the last few moments we have received reports of geth ships forming up in Black Widow, their intentions remain unclear but the Council has been evacuated to the Destiny Ascension as a precaution. Admiral Hackett is mobilising the fifth fleet and we will take our place in the armada once we have dealt with Saren.”

Shepard composed herself, “we have no idea what we face, we have no idea what Saren’s intentions are or how Sovereign will be deployed. The future of galactic peace is at stake, if the Reapers come there won’t be a single person in the Milky Way the war doesn’t touch. None of you asked for this, but you all took the Oath to Serve, today more than ever before I need you to all step up, the crew believes in each and every one of you, your moment is now.”

Shepard finished with a defiant salute, as the officers present stood in unison, locking themselves to attention and returning the gesture, the Commander smiled inwardly as she saw the fire in the eyes of each of them.

As Robyn fell in step to head back to engineering she felt a hand on her shoulder.

“Lieutenant” Robyn paused and turned towards the Commander, “I know this can’t be easy for you being thrown onto the front line like this” Robyn set her jaw in determination, yes this wasn’t exactly how she had planned to spend her week but first and foremost she was a marine, she knew her duty. “I need you in the cockpit with Joker; Tali and Adams will prep engineering but I need you to take point when we join up with fifth fleet, you know the tactics and the capabilities of this ship like nobody else, I’m actually really glad you’re here.”  
“Of course, Commander, it would be an honour to take the Normandy into battle.” Robyn replied without hesitation.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
Sat in the co-pilots chair as the Normandy held a geostationary orbit above Ilos, Robyn tried to filter out the comms chatter from the ground team, it was always hard to follow and could end up being more of a hindrance than a help. Keeping an eye on all the systems she was just finishing up a quick note to Suvi.

“Harris I’ve missed you” Joker said, his hands lazily at the controls keeping the Normandy tracking, “remember how much fun we had testing this baby out?”

Robyn smiled, it had been a blast, “and now we get to do it all for real.”  
“Yeah, not so much fun when lives are on the line though, you have to be all serious and ‘evaluate risk’” he mocked the tone of a stuffy flight school instructor. The humour was a welcome relief to the tension that was rippling through the ship.

Robyn smiled as her omni-tool pinged with Suvi’s reply, telling her to stay safe.  
“Whatcha smilin’ at Lieutenant” Joker smirked, Robyn swore she saw him wink. She felt the heat rise in her cheeks.  
“Nothin’” she mumbled.  
“Yeah yeah, you lying to a cripple now? Come on” the helmsman teased.  
“A note from my girlfriend” Robyn stated stiffly.  
“Speak up Harris I didn’t quite catch that; did you say girlfriend?” he had deliberately emphasised the last part.

Robyn was about to reply when the comms cut through “Ground team to Normandy. The conduit is a back door to the Citadel….in pursuit…head to rally point…..” the frantic tone of Commander Shepard only just cutting through the static.

Joker immediately pulled the ship out of orbit going full burn to the relay, groans from the crew indicated not everyone had been holding on, despite the feeling of chaos that was quickly unravelling inside her, Robyn couldn’t help but grin as the Normandy hit the relay with the thrill of the mass effect field taking hold and sling-shotting them across eons of space.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
The battle for the Citadel was mostly a blur, Robyn had gone into autopilot, as it should be, all her training paying off as she formulated an ever-changing strategy to take down their foes. When Shepard had opened the relays, and ordered the fleet to save the Council the initial scene had been overwhelming, hundreds of geth fighters twisted and turned like dandelion heads caught in the wind, each one falling seemed to duplicate into two or three others.

Robyn would never forget the view of the Citadel arms opening, the Normandy sweeping low over the wards, twisting out of range of the geth ships and Sovereign, other Alliance vessels weren’t so lucky. The whole fleet stared in disbelief as the reaper’s weapon sliced through a cruiser as if it were glass, shards of scorched and shattered metal raining down on the station below.

Calls came to pull back but the Admiral drove the fleet harder.

“Negative” the unmistakable tone of the Admiral rang out, “this is our only chance, take that monster down no matter what the cost.”

On the flight deck Joker and Robyn looked at each other, a look of ‘let’s fucking do this’ passed between them.

“Everyone hold on” Joker yelled.  
“Tali, Adams, reroute all available power, shutdown any non-essential systems, and reduce the ships gravity, I want forward sector shields at maximum capacity” Robyn spoke quickly into the coms.  
“Got it” came Tali’s assured response.

_[Its shields are down, now’s our chance]_

Robyn felt her body forced into her seat as Joker tore the ship through an about turn and dived straight towards the Reaper. She fired the remaining arsenal of warheads and watched as they imploded setting off a chain reaction which tore through Sovereign.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------  
The immediate aftermath was no less chaotic, far worse in fact than the battle. Joker immediately set about docking the Normandy and the remaining crew either went to support the ground team or carry out repairs. Robyn quickly gathered her things, tossing them into her ‘quarters’ and headed out with C-Sec to help with the search effort. Large portions of the wards were on fire, the sound of people screaming, trying to escape their homes, gathering what possessions they could.

For the next six days Robyn slept little, ate less and continued to sift through rubble looking for survivors, as the days wore on the depression became heavier, survivors became bodies, she made sure to treat each one with the care, respect and dignity it deserved.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------  
With a sigh the Lieutenant stood up, whilst those lost needed to be remembered, dwelling on their passing, questioning decisions and lingering on ‘what if’s’ wasn’t going to bring them back. Robyn tried to let go of the weight she bore in her chest, it would take time, but accepting she’d done her best was the first small step.

Robyn carefully pulls off her boots and sheds her uniform, the uniform which had been her defence. Whilst joining the Alliance had meant she’d been able to pursue her studies, she was thankful for the mental strength the rigorous training had given her. She’d managed to wrangle a shower on the Asari cargo ship that gave her passage back to Illium but the fatigues which she was proud to wear were stiff with dust, blood and sweat. 

Pulling on a t-shirt and clean underwear she gently opened the door to Suvi’s bedroom, the bedside light was on but the rooms occupant was sleeping soundly, balled up in the duvet facing the wall.

Robyn carefully climbed into bed, slipping an arm under the arch of Suvi’s neck letting the full length of her body press into the waiting warmth, her other arm wrapped around to find a soft hand, fingers entwined. Safely locked together Robyn let her face nuzzle into Suvi’s shoulder, inhaling the comforting scent and letting the security of the snuggle chase away the lingering demons, falling into a dreamless sleep.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi couldn’t quite place what was different as her omni tool alarm clock sounded, she pulled herself from the depths of sleep to bring up the display and as she watched a hand that wasn’t her own hit the ‘off’ button her heart leapt. Twisting in Robyn’s arms she threw every bit of herself, every ounce of love and care and tenderness, every drop of emotion into a kiss. The tears of sheer joy and relief silently pooling and eventually overflowing down her cheeks.

As her fingers found their familiar place in the hair at the base of Robyn’s neck she said a silent prayer of thanks for the safe return of her lover. 

Neither wanted to break the silence, neither knew what to say, and so they kissed, and as their kisses deepened and hands wandered, their movements matched, bodies merging and souls reaching out entwining as one, knots tied never to be undone.

And as their breath steadied and frantic touches became gentle caresses the whispers of “I love you” echoed through every part of their being as they fell into one another.


	7. Shadows & Spectres

Spring had begun to break across Illium, the dusky purple haze which smothered the city just before sunrise crept forward a little each day. You had to look closely to feel the subtle difference of this Spring from those that had passed before. The battle of the Citadel had tarnished Council space, rather than the high gloss of a polished surface, the reflections you saw were jaded, fuzzy, like the glint of brushed alloy. Whilst the Officials tried to quell any rumours, people were talking, particularly at ISSAC where many of the scientists were engaged in sensitive research, some even believing their own hypotheses were coming true.

Suvi had noticed the shift, the extra security which tried to remain hidden but telegraphed itself with vigilant stares and gone-cold coffee cups, half full as they tried to loiter casually. Sometimes she felt the hairs on her neck stand up as if she were being observed, she’d given up looking over her shoulder, she’d be lucky to catch a glimpse of an out of place shadow. Often it was as though the very walls were whispering, listening, nobody lingered in spaces, staff moved purposefully, heads bowed, brief glances all that were to be had.

The young scientist shuddered as she entered her lab, it was always cold first thing, the conditioned air tracking perfectly across the space giving a uniform distribution of coolth. As she sat down and prepared to enter the next set of control parameters her mind drifted to Robyn, her girlfriend would be home tonight, she wished she could have travelled to the Citadel with her but understood that this was something the Lieutenant had to do alone.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------  
The stifling oppression of so many people crammed into too small a space and the atmosphere thick with the grief of all those present threatened to suffocate Robyn. She nervously tweaked the collar of her dress blues desperately seeking some relief, she knew it was her imagination, she knew she could breathe just fine, but the claustrophobia which tugged at her edges continued regardless.

There was something very special about the moment hundreds of marines in their finest dress blues, rise as one, heels locking to attention and saluting, the white gloved hands slicing through the air with an audible swish. Admiral Hackett returned the salute, absorbing the view of thousands of eyes stood to attention, his heart filled with pride.

“Today is not about mourning, or grief.” The Admirals words hung in the air like dust, settling on the shoulders of the marines before him. “Today is a moment to remember and give thanks to an exceptional marine, a respected leader and a deserved Council Spectre.” A pause, his next few words would make the newsfeeds and rumours a reality, the next few words would be the final straw for some of those barely keeping it together, give them one last moment of calm he thought. 

“The loss of Commander Jane Shepard and the SSV Normandy has torn the Alliance to its core.” Hackett’s voice rang out across the auditorium, “Shepard’s contribution to galactic peace is incomparable, her values of honesty, trust and integrity united a crew like no other to face down the threat of Saren and his army of Geth, she led her team regardless of the unsurmountable odds with professionalism and heroic endeavour.”

The Admiral paused, the words weren’t coming as freely as he would have liked. “The future challenges we face are unclear, we must all bring to the fore our best, we must all hold close to our hearts the moral values which set us apart from our foes. Find in yourselves a part of Shepard, push beyond what you thought you knew of yourself and let the friendships and love you hold dear be your guiding beacon in the dark times to come, honour her with every action you take.”

With a final salute to his rapt audience, “To Commander Jane Shepard.”  
“To Shepard” the congregation replied in defiant unison.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------  
At 1100 precisely the stranger strode purposefully across the central concourse of the ISSAC research facility, her destination clear, her planning meticulous. This woman wasn’t a visitor, a visitor would have accepted the welcoming smile of the main reception desk, a visitor would have signed in and hastily pinned the temporary ID to their clothing, conscious of following protocol. A visitor would have waited patiently whilst their contact made their way from whatever part of the institute to shake their hand and guide them to their office.

No, the tall woman with dark flowing hair was a stranger, she knew the blind spots of the security cameras and moved with a fluid ease, a confident buzz daring to be challenged, although she knew she wouldn’t be. The Asari commando units which now stalked the facility both seen and unseen were focused elsewhere, today their target wasn’t even at the facility but too much change would raise suspicion. 

The woman only hesitated a moment before knocking and entering the lab.

Dr Anwar was hunched over one of her test rigs carefully calibrating the mass effect field generators which held her chosen gas particles in a uniform distribution over the surface of the photovoltaic panels.

“Come on, come on” she muttered to herself as the tool she was holding slipped from her grasp “dammit” she cursed herself. She was so engrossed that the movement in the peripheral of her vision made her jump with a start.

Her visitor stood tall, wrapped in a matt black cat suit which left very little to the imagination, Suvi’s brain quickly took in the stranger’s dimensions, perfectly proportioned hip to shoulder to waist ratio, a belt hung loosely off the hips to accentuate the proportions, the zip, which was off centre, guided the eye up and over the perfectly shaped chest to a face which was framed with dark hair so glossy it looked like a liquid.

At first Suvi thought she was looking at a cyborg but the skin tone and eye movement definitely reflected those of a human. “Too good to be true” Suvi thought to herself.  
“Can I help you?” She asked calmly, something about this woman’s presence and the developments over the last few months had put Anwar on edge, she’d become increasingly cautious.

“Dr Anwar, my name is Miranda Lawson and I’m here to offer you a job.”  
Suvi just stared, totally taken aback, she stuttered “I’m sorry?”

Miranda wasn’t one to dither, “I work for an organisation whose concern is the progression of humanity within the global community, whether that be across military, colonial or scientific affairs. We are about to start a project requiring expertise in microbiology, in particular cellular regeneration, you are an expert in this field…” It was a statement rather than a question, Lawson continued, “and thus we are offering you the opportunity to work with us.” Miranda paused, letting her statement sink in, “We are aware of the current status of your research and hope that once you complete the remaining four months of study you will join the Lazarus team, please understand our work is of a sensitive nature and is strictly confidential, you would not be able to discuss your appointment with anyone outside of our organisation and even internally the Lazarus project is strictly ‘need to know.’”

Suvi pinched the bridge of her nose, her mind racing, “this is weird” she thought, “very, very weird.”

Miranda’s tone had softened “I understand this is all a shock, particularly combined with other recent developments…” Miranda trailed off.

Suvi met her eye, could she really be referring to the Reapers?

“Lazarus is part of a wider strategy to tackle the Reaper threat.” Miranda stated as if reading Suvi’s mind. “We are also aware of the research Lt. Harris is currently engaged in, whilst her security measures have lasted so far, recent events, mean her threat level has increased, your romantic involvement will present you as a target, we can protect you, both of you.”

Suvi’s mind twisted so many questioned barrelled into her at once she didn’t even know where to begin.

“Can I think about it?” it sounded meek and petty coming out of her mouth but it was all her brain could come up with.

Miranda smiled, “of course, I have emailed you the brief, contract and remuneration package, you can let me know your decision via those contact details, take as long as you require.”

Without a further word Miranda Lawson turned on her heels and left the lab.  
Suvi just shook her head in silent disbelief.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn absorbed the view of the presidium, the artificial sunlight sparkled off the lakes below, the shadows of the fountains dancing across the rippled surface, the air smelt of summer, it always did here. The Lieutenant knew she was being watched, the spectres which ducked and weaved just out of her scope of vision had started to arrive when she’d got back to ISSAC following the citadel ‘incident’ as the media were calling it. She knew her research couldn’t stay secret and the unknown backers made it all the more likely that interest would be piqued.

She waited, she knew it was time for whoever was skulking in the shadows to show themselves, she’d forced their hand by not leaking any material and her security being too high for snooping.

Robyn had thought long and hard about who her new entourage belonged to, the list was short once you’d really thought about the motivations of each faction. Cerberus had crossed themselves off the list pretty early on, although she knew they didn’t know what she was working on anything human centric and they wanted a finger in the pie. They’d approached her directly a few days after she’d got back to the lab, they believed Shepard and the Reaper threat and had started to put plans in motion to ‘prepare’. Robyn had made it clear her allegiances lay with the Alliance, whilst she agreed they could be short sighted, Robyn’s moral compass meant there was little chance she’d be working to what amounted to a well-funded, highly educated terrorist organisation.

Wondering if she’d misjudged the situation Robyn was about to take her leave when a woman approached.  
“It was a moving memorial” the stranger spoke gently but the edge of quiet determination shone through.  
“I think it put fire back in the bellies of the Marines, as was the plan” Robyn responded calmly, “how can I help you Ms. Garson?”

The woman next to her stiffened slightly, this was unexpected, Robyn smiled, before continuing, “don’t be surprised, you know my service record, you know my expertise beyond ship development, which by the way Lucille has been in touch about, you know very well I specialise in stealth and reconnaissance, I know the AI is funding my research.”

Jien Garson smiled, she’s good, very good she mused, “very well, are you aware of the other funding stream?” 

Robyn blew out her cheeks, “I may be wrong but I believe the Asari Republic have put up the credits, but I can’t be sure, the money was well hidden.”  
Jien nodded “indeed, Councillor Tevos has gone to great lengths to distance the Republic from your work, it would destabilise the Council if the other races knew the Asari were engaged in one-upmanship.”

“Is that why I have my own Commando honour guard?” The Lieutenant asked, yes Illium made it easy for the Asari to operate almost undetected, but Robyn was party to their tactics, she knew the clues to look for.

“Tevos has got cold feet, despite what the media is reporting the Council, or at least the Asari are taking Shepard seriously, whilst they are distancing themselves publically arrangements are being made.” She paused, Robyn picked up her train of thought.

“A sudden influx in Asari volunteers signing up to go to Andromeda?” 

“You could say that” Garson replied, “your funding will be pulled in the next couple of months, you will be asked to destroy your research and you’ll be ushered back into the Alliance.”

“They’re watching us right now” Robyn stated, “they’ll know you’ve told me, why do they want me to stop?”

“They fear the Reapers will follow the Initiative to Andromeda, your work poses a risk to that, the Republic isn’t willing to take that risk when ‘continuity of civilisation’ is at stake.”

“I took the Oath to Serve Ms. Garson, you are disclosing all of this to back me into a corner, I have ignored the application prompts and recruitment propaganda, I may not be traditional marine but I honour my commitments. I will not travel to Andromeda.”

“They’ll kill you.” Garson stated bluntly.  
“Not if I do what they ask.” Robyn retorted.

“Think carefully about your actions Lieutenant” Garson warned “we both know an unstoppable force and an immoveable object cannot mutually exist.”  
Jien Garson left Robyn to her thoughts and the shadows which lingered retreated.

“And so, the battle lines are drawn” Robyn whispered.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
Jien Garson opened a secure comm channel.  
“Alec, it’s Jien.”  
“How did it go?” the gravelled voice of Alec Ryder still carried gravitas even across VOEX.  
“She’s forced our hand, that research cannot be lost, I have arrangements to make on the Nexus, do what you must."  
The connection died.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
The unexpected visit from Miranda Lawson had left Suvi feeling troubled and unable to focus, with an exasperated sigh she gathered her things and made her way back to the apartment, it was only 1300.

Stepping into the corridor from the elevator a young Asari was working on her Omni-tool outside the door, Suvi remained still not wanting to activate the proximity lock.  
“Can I help you?” she spoke softly, measuredly, the maiden jumped.

“Erm, hello,” the Asari quickly shut off her Omni-tool, “I’m looking for Dr. Harris, she asked me to pick up some research material, I’m her lab partner.” The maiden began to  
stumble over her words, Suvi could have been deaf and would have known she was lying.

“I think you should leave” she stated flatly, eyes narrowing.  
The maiden swallowed hard, perspiration had broken out on her crest, she dropped her head and practically ran towards the elevator.

“This day is just getting weirder and weirder” Suvi tutted to herself.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn suspected something was up the moment she returned home, surprisingly Suvi lasted until they were both settled on the couch after dinner, Robyn having changed out of her uniform into jeans and a t-shirt.

"Ro, we need to talk" Suvi said quietly.  
Robyn looked up and raised an eyebrow "sounds serious Anwar."

Before she knew what was happening the words were tumbling out of her mouth "I have had the strangest day, first ISSAC now has more military personal than scientists, secondly Miss Universe 2185 turns up in my lab offering me a highly secretive new job with an astronomical pay package – oh but I can't tell anyone about it, thirdly it turns out your research is going to get you killed." She paused, "and to top it all off I come home to find some bumbling fool trying to hack the door to our apartment."

Robyn let her vent, let the words wash over her in polite silence.

"You done?" She asked, smiling when it appeared Suvi had run out of steam. Her girlfriend nodded.  
"OK – number one, Miranda Lawson works for Cerberus, a human centric terrorist organisation, not under any circumstances must you take that job."

Suvi stared, how many times was she going to feel lost today?

Robyn continued "Secondly – she'll have warned you that I'm a target and because we are together you're a target, leverage over me." Robyn let her statement hang in the air like a question.

Suvi swallowed "yeah, she mentioned that, how do they know?"  
"Because they're monitoring our communications"  
"What!" Suvi spluttered, "you knew?"  
"Suvi, I have deliberately not told you about my research to keep you safe, I knew when I came here certain 'interested parties' would monitor my activity, it comes with the territory." Robyn stretched out on the sofa inviting Suvi to snuggle up to her.

The Lieutenant kissed her forehead, "I haven't bothered you with any of this because there are bigger things at play," Robyn sighed "take the place the Andromeda Initiative have offered you."

Suvi tensed next to her "how did you?" she whispered.

"They've been sending me recruitment stuff for months, you are a far more well-respected scientist than I Dr. Anwar" Robyn let her compliment settle as a blush to Suvi's cheeks, "I know they approached you, I know you applied, and I know they've offered you the chance to work within the science team with Professor Henrik, who I know you acknowledged in your last thesis." Robyn pulled Suvi even closer "and you know you have to go, right?"

When Suvi spoke her voice was small, the rock in the pit of her stomach weighed even heavier than usual, threatening to bury her, "I really want to, but... " she trailed off.

"I love you" Robyn whispered, "but I can't follow you” those were the words Suvi was afraid to hear, even though she knew they would come. 

“With Shepard gone I have to go back to the Alliance, my research funding will be pulled soon, the Milky Way as we know it will change, the war that is coming well, if there is a chance you can escape that, you have to take it, for me."

"I've started to dream Robyn, about us, about our future together..." Silent tears had started to escape down her cheeks, Robyn kissed them away.

"Let me show you something." Robyn sat up and pulled a holo OSD from her bag, she placed it on the coffee table and turned off the lights, schematics of a ship flickered into view, sitting side by side Robyn took Suvi's hands in her own. "These are the designs for the Tempest, it's a highly advanced scout ship that the AI Pathfinder teams will be using.” Suvi marvelled at the sleek lines and smooth curves of the ship. “Lucille Diawara is the lead designer and an old friend, I've been helping out with a few tweaks. Maybe you'll never set foot on the Pathfinder ships but know there is a part of me, the best part of me, in Andromeda with you, helping to find your new home." Robyn's voice began to crack, 

"I have to stay here and fight Suvi, whatever happens, if there is the chance you might one day come back, I want there to be an Earth for you to call home."

Suvi kissed her, their tears now freely flowing. Robyn reached into her t-shirt and pulled off her Alliance dog tags, dropping them into Suvi's palm and closing her fingers around them, "I'll always be with you Suvi, wherever the stars take us, I'll be waiting on the other side."  
\--------------------------------------------------------------  
As dawn broke, Lieutenant Robyn Harris untangled herself from the warm embrace of Suvi Anwar, their lovemaking had been slow, drawn out, full of love and sorrow, a goodbye neither wanted to say. 

The marine showered and dressed in her fatigues, ensuring her appearance was pristine, nothing less would do, she packed her belongings in the crates and locked them shut. 

Placing her beret on she returned to a slumbering Suvi, kneeling by the bed she stroked the stray locks of hair from her lover’s face, watching as her eyes fluttered open.  
As Robyn placed her lips against Suvi’s, her eyes closed and she inhaled the beautiful scent she now knew as home, both women savoured the bittersweet kiss of a last goodbye.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
The Turian who had delivered her groceries for nearly two years leant casually against the wall, his stock trolley empty, apart from some plastic sheeting. Robyn smiled, wondering how much they'd paid him for the hit, she’d easily traced the tips she gave him each week to his account, she knew his kill list, his preferred method, where he lived and what school his kids went to, she knew he'd been waiting, biding his time, the Commandos wouldn't have gotten near her, but he could walk right into her home.  
Robyn nodded an acknowledgement and didn't react as she felt the stab of the needle in her shoulder, let death take me quickly, she thought, let it be done.  
\------------------------------------------------------  
In the business district of Illium Dr Liara T'Soni takes her seat at her desk, the newsfeeds muted in the background, she notices there has been an explosion at ISSAC, but pays little attention, these things often happen when researchers push too far. She takes her mail from her helpful assistant, who she doesn't entirely trust.

As she opens the padded envelope a single OSD slips out, a handwritten note attached, written in English, she scans it with her Omni-tool to translate.

 _Dr. T'Soni,_  
_A project for when you complete Shepard's work._  
_RH_  
\--------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi didn't need to know which lab the explosion had come from, the shadows which had stood at the edges of ISSAC had vanished. As the plume of smoke rose into the sky and lazily drifted in the unseen currents of the air, her heart broke, the only feeling making it though her numbness was the cool weight of the tags resting on her chest.


	8. Take her to the Stars

“Anwar wake up!”

Suvi felt herself being shaken awake, grumpy at being asked to give up the final, fleeting moments of sleep, which had been so hard to come by in Andromeda. As she tried to bury her head under her pillow she felt it being pulled away.

“Oooh no, come on” 

Reluctantly Suvi rolled over propping herself on her elbow and looking at her sleep thief.

“What Gil, what is it?” She questioned huffily.

“The Hyperion arrived” Gil grinned from ear to ear as she saw Suvi’s eyes widen and her mouth form a wordless ‘O’.  
“No way” she breathed.

Gil nodded “the call came an hour ago, the whole of the Nexus is buzzing we’ve got to get to the Tempest.”

Suvi shook her head “What! Gil why didn’t you wake me sooner?” Gil rolled his eyes as he watched the science officer tumble out of her bunk and start cramming her belongings into a case.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
When Suvi approached the docking hold it was oddly quiet, whilst there was a hive of activity nobody really spoke, it was as if nobody on the Nexus could quite believe this day had come.

Carrying her sole luggage case Suvi gripped the handles tighter, feeling the material of her gloves flex and bunch around her fingers. The last six months had been horrendous, well no the last ten months had been horrendous.

The sixteen weeks before the Nexus had taken its leave of the Milky Way were ones Suvi was glad lay six hundred years in her past. She’d buried the loss of Robyn as deeply as she could, it was too painful to contemplate, her partners belongings, already packed, had been collected by a porter and she was left alone and empty at ISSAC.  


Meeting Robyn’s parents at the memorial she’d nearly fainted, they’d wrapped her up in their arms and held her close, told her how they’d hoped to welcome her into their family as a second daughter. The smile that reached their eyes even through the tears as they told her how Robyn had written to them how she knew Suvi was ‘the one’. They’d pressed the folded flag and medal into her hands, asking her to carry their daughter beyond the stars.

Suvi had rushed to submit her research and join the Initiative, throwing herself into the preparation working under a fantastic team of motivated and passionate individuals.  


Then they’d arrived, Suvi remembered the first few days of utter confusion after coming out of cryo, discovering her team leader had been exiled and she now found herself thrust into a leadership role within the science team. Every day since she’d wished Robyn was with her, the task of calculating how long the supplies would last and who was worth feeding, who wasn’t had been one of the hardest statistical evaluations she’d ever undertaken. How do you put a correction factor on a life she’d asked herself more than once? Dreams of final kisses in burning flames kept her mind racing at night, she tried to let the swirling horror of the Scourge mesmerise her into a stupor but the taste of smoke in her throat always woke her.

A turning point had come when she’d discovered she would eventually be assigned to the Pathfinder team as a liaison between the Tempest and the Nexus science crew. She’d then been introduced to Gil and Kallo, the trio had become inseparable, the hope that one day she’d be flying with Robyn through the stars again seemed to settle her soul.  


And here she was, finally able to look upon the beautifully designed scout ship it’s shining hull in sharp contrast to the surroundings, vibrant red accents stood out vividly. The ball of emotion she’d swallowed all those months ago seemed to swell inside her, the anger and frustration she’d felt, the deals she’d tried to strike with herself, what she’d do for one last moment with Robyn. That had faded, or dulled at least, but the overwhelming loneliness and sadness which filled her heart was proving harder to shift.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------  
“I’ll be back in a moment Suvi” Kallo said, rising from his seat and walking steadily towards the back of the bridge. Alone for the first time, Suvi stood up and walked to the navigation terminal, drawing her fingers along the balustrade. They’d just entered the Pytheas system, heading towards their first destination, the star at the centre bathed the bridge in warm gold, despite the Scourge the view was breathtakingly wonderful.

Suvi wasn’t sure what drew her to the thick book that sat on top of Kallo’s terminal, she found her fingers thumbing the pages of a dog-eared design and operations manual. The images and schematics of the Tempest’s systems lay before her, Kallo’s notes scribbled in the margins.

The science officer could almost feel the arms of her lover wrap around her and the presence of her body press into her back, Robyn’s breath on her neck a soft kiss below her ear. Suvi closed her eyes, when she opened them she found herself at the front of the manual, looking at the acknowledgements. The usual thanks to team mates, friends and family and then a second paragraph which made Suvi’s throat dry and hands tremble as she ran her fingertips over the ink.

_Special thanks must go to RH, whose design vision of flowing lines and ocean curves matched the delicate dance of her equations. Although she will never see the Tempest fly, the Tempest could not fly without her._

Kallo placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder, “Suvi, are you alright?” he asked in his gentle tone.

In an instant Robyn was gone and the silent tears which cooled her cheek stung, she rubbed her eyes with the back of her hands, “I’ll” she faltered “I’ll be fine” she gulped the sob away.

Kallo looked down at what she was reading, “I wish I knew who she was Suvi, Lucille was very secretive about her, but every time we hit a wall her mystery woman would produce this perfect, elegant solution, almost like poetry” he sighed wistfully.

“You would have loved her Kallo” Suvi whispered. Kallo Jath looked at Suvi as if seeing her for the first time, the enigma that had been the pain she carried with her revealing itself, finally he understood. “She was such a perfectionist, such a geek” Suvi laughed, smiling now, through the tears, for the first time in months she remembered what it had felt like to be loved and feel whole, she looked out at the waiting planet, come on then Harris she thought, let’s see what you’re made of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short one - I needed to get all the hurt out in one go before I drown myself in ice cream and wine.
> 
> If you haven't already, now might be a good time to read the "Beyond the Archon" series, well at least: Find Yourself & A Question of Judgement. The next few chapters will build on openings I left in those pieces regarding Dr. Anwar.
> 
> Thanks to those of you still following the progress of this project, I really do appreciate it.


	9. Baggage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this point on we are post critical path ME:A in my "Beyond the Archon" universe The canon for this is:
> 
> Sara Ryder - Pathfinder  
> Sara/Lexi - romance (see 'Find Yourself')  
> Sloane died, the fallout is in 'A Question of Judgement' this also explains the lack of Liam  
> Scott replaced Liam.
> 
> You can view this chapter almost as a series of drabbles which fill in gaps I left in these other works, plot relevant 'heavy petting' don't say I didn't warn you.

Finally, the music in Vortex had picked up, gone were the relaxed synthesised tones of chilled out drinks and lazy conversation, now the bass rippled through the walls as if to mimic the pulse of the crowd within. The volume rose as if to drown out the thoughts of the patrons, the mesmerizing rhythms calling souls to the dance floor, asking them to forget about the world outside of the movement of their body.

Suvi stood with Peebee, Vetra and Drack, they’re first shore leave since defeating the Archon and a lot of steam needed to be blown off, a half empty bottle of ryncol already sitting on the table next to one of whiskey for the non krogan contingent.

Peebee slammed her glass on the table, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand “so how did you know?” she asked Suvi with the beginnings of a slur.  
Dr. Anwar smiled as she took a careful sip of her drink, savouring the peaty smoothness which made her taste buds tingle. The crew had just watched the Pathfinder and Dr T’Perro usher themselves out. “Expectant pauses.” Suvi stated simply. Peebee looked at her questioningly, the science officer continued, “moments between conversations or actions which are heavy with anticipation” she met the Asari’s gaze, speaking pointedly, “those moments where both parties want something more, but are afraid to cross the line.” She thought of Lexi and Sara, finally taking that jump, hoping they’d save each other from the fall.

“Dance with me?” Peebee croaked, her voice catching, she felt herself suddenly feeling very hot.

Suvi carefully placed her empty glass on the table, letting Peebee lead her by the hand into the crowd, she couldn’t help but drop her hip a little more than necessary as she walked, or take her eyes off the swaying ass of her crewmate in front of her.

“Well, nobody saw that coming a mile away” Vetra clucked sarcastically.  
“Heh, kids” Drack scooped up the bottle of ryncol swigging from the bottle, “I’ll be with Kesh” and stomped out.  
“I guess I’ll have an early night then” Vetra mumbled to herself as she headed back to her bunk.

On the dance floor the Remnant Tech expert and Tempest Science officer lost themselves in one another and the music. The closeness of other revellers insulating them from the rest of the world. Hands found hips and shoulders, spaces closed, heart beats became louder than the thump of the music. Suvi’s eyes were mesmerized by the lips of the Asari whose body heat threaded with her own, charging her touch with wanting. Like a free diver preparing to explore the hidden depths Suvi inhaled her courage, crossing the line they’d both been toeing for months.

Hot gasps caught in throats as tentative lips communicated reserved, hesitant lust, the pull to move deeper. The dangers lurking in the deep hadn’t been visible from the shallows, Suvi realised almost too late the breath she’d taken wouldn’t last, thrashing to break the surface the tendrils of panic crept from the base of her spine, suddenly overwhelmed, the music too loud, Peebee too close, body too hot.

Suvi stepped back, Peebee reached out to steady her, Suvi looked confused, pale, shocked by her own reaction. Carefully Peebee took her hand and pulled her through the crowd out into the cool night air of the commons, pulling Suvi down onto a bench, “hey, take it easy, deep breaths” she spoke softly, gently drawing circles on the back of the Scot’s hand.

“Sorry, I…” Suvi couldn’t meet Peebee’s gaze, she didn’t have to, the Asari laid a finger against her lips, before moving her hand to cup Suvi’s cheek.  
“Don’t stress, no pressure okay?”  
Suvi nodded.  
“Come on, I’ve a bottle of something special on the Tempest, let’s talk shit until the sun rises”

They had, whispers and giggles each telling the other stories, hopes and dreams, about friends and family, the gin lubricating tongues, they skirted heavy topics, like sailors navigating ice fields, each knowing a stray comment could unearth the hidden mass of unconfronted emotion which lay in wait.

The arrival of the Pathfinder, barefoot in the galley to make tea for her and Lexi signalled they’d achieved their objective, the sun had risen, Suvi giggled. “Well hello Pathfinder!” Suvi couldn’t help but let her eye travel up the bare leg of Sara Ryder, the gin causing her face to flush at the toned outline of her quads.

“You two look like you’re having fun, have you made it to bed yet?” Ryder asked, though she already knew the answer. She busied herself searching for the blend of Angaran herb she’d picked up on Aya, it was similar to peppermint back home but with a hint of rhubarb.

“Sleep’s for losers, besides, I jettisoned my bed remember?” Peebee grinned. “Have you been to sleep yet Ryder, or has the good Doctor been keeping you up?” 

“Do you want a blow by blow account Ms B’Sayle?” Ryder teased “to give you something to think about later?”

“Oh, in those pants I’m already thinking” Peebee would give as much as she got.  
Suvi’s face was a picture “will you two stop, I’ve had far too much to drink for this kind of conversation!”

“Or not nearly enough” Ryder smiled as she left with her two steaming mugs of tea.

Suvi closed her eyes and steadied herself, she wished she could feel so relaxed and confident, not that she wanted to walk around the ship in her pants but just that feeling of being free. The small voice she so often failed to listen to reminded her that she had once felt like that and would do so again.

Her mind took her back to lazy weekends at ISSAC, stretched out on her bed, still in pyjamas despite it being the middle of the day. She’d read waiting for Robyn to come back from her training, she loved her fresh out the shower, shaggy hair dripping, stray droplets still clinging to her neck, eyes bright with endorphins.

They’d lie together and talk, Robyn’s gaze intense, hanging onto Suvi’s words as she became animated about her research, explaining a latest theory or simply retelling a story she was reading. In those moments, she felt at the centre of her girlfriend’s universe, nothing else mattered to her. 

Suvi wouldn’t falter as Robyn’s hand would stray to the delicate skin of her inner thigh, her breath might hitch but she’d carry on her speech, the eye contact and contented smile the consent Robyn needed. As Robyn’s touch brought her closer Suvi’s fingers would find their home in those damp locks, pulling the Lieutenant down, the pressure of tongues meeting, equations and definitions still lingering as she moaned into the kiss.

Robyn had done that, had made her feel so intensely special as though her sole reason for existing was to bring pleasure to Suvi in all its guises, and to do so totally selflessly.  
Suvi opened her eyes, her pulse spiked as she felt the pull of desire between her legs, she almost moaned with wanting, feeling Peebee’s hand on her thigh.

Peebee looked at her quizzically, a smirk dancing in her eyes. Suvi stood up abruptly “I need sleep, and a cold shower” she met Peebee’s eye “maybe not in that order.”  
“I could join you” Peebee quipped, letting her voice drop an octave.  
Suvi bent down and kissed her, taking the Asari’s bottom lip between her teeth before pulling away, “soon.”  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------  
“Will you calm down” Peebee was exasperated, Suvi was pacing up and down the walkway above the Tempest’s cargo hold.  
“I will not ‘calm down’” Suvi snarled “this is what happens when you cross a professional boundary people get hurt, judgements get clouded.”

Peebee rolled her eyes, standing up off of the cargo crate she’d been sitting on, she stepped in front of Suvi placing her hands on her shoulders.  
“Liam was a dick, deluded, Sara would never, ever, be with him, it wasn’t about them, he was driven by this stupid idea that he needed to prove himself” she paused, “I’m not Liam, we’re not Liam.”

Suvi exhaled letting her shoulders sag under the weight of Peebee’s hands, she still looked unsure.

“What is this really about?” Peebee asked, her tone softening.

She saw the tears of sadness and frustration well at the corner of Suvi’s eyes, she pulled the science officer towards her, “hey come on, just say it.”

“I can’t let her go” Suvi croaked, “you need me to let her go, to stop loving her and I can’t, it hurts Peebee, she was murdered, taken without explaination, I just can’t.”

“Woah there” Peebee leaned back, wiping the tears from Suvi’s face “nobody said anything about love, I like you, I want to explore these feelings that I have for you, which we both have” she fixed Suvi with a knowing look, “but there’s no pressure, I’m gonna live for a thousand years, there’s gonna be baggage, I don’t care if part of you always loves her, she’s part of your story and neither of you asked for this.”

Suvi tried to calm herself, “just try and relax about it all, okay” Peebee whispered “things work out.”  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
With Sara and Cora still recovering from their injuries the rest of the Tempest’s crew busied themselves with resupplying the ship, carrying out any repairs and catching up on tasks they had to put off when away from the Nexus. Nobody spoke much, the tremor of anger at Liam still raw, the wound would take time to heal, the betrayal still bitter in their mouths.

Suvi spent a lot of her time mulling over Peebee’s words, her mind trying to process, analyse, digest and extrapolate. The more she thought about it the more frustrated she became, the dreams which woke her in the night, sweat clinging to her skin morphed between Robyn and Peebee. Confusion aggravated by failed attempts to release her frustration in private, the guilt her fantasies left her with tormenting, either she was doing a disservice to Peebee or scared she might forget what Robyn felt like.  
Her path through the turmoil was unclear and she was no closer to a solution when the Tempest finally took its leave of the Nexus.

Busying herself away from her thoughts Suvi picked up a crate of medical supplies, the Tempest’s cargo hold was crammed with supplies which needed to be sorted and stowed. She entered the Med bay, about to ask Lexi where she wanted the box Suvi froze, her mouth dry, turned sharply and left the way she’d come.

Outside she carefully placed the supplies on the floor and leaned back against the wall, closing her eyes. The image of Dr T’Perro, naked sat on the edge of one of the beds, blue legs wrapped around a topless Sara Ryder’s waist. It was the look of unreserved ecstasy on Lexi’s face as Sara mapped perfect touches on her lover with lips and hands which burned into Suvi’s mind. She wanted that, no, she needed it.

She strode into the cargo bay, weaving her way through the maze of towering boxes in search of blue. Peebee gasped as she felt Dr Anwar rush past her, grabbing her arm and pulling her into the dark, away from prying eyes. The feeling of the cold metal bulkhead against her shoulder blades grounded Suvi as she reached for Peebee, aching as they kissed violently. When Peebee pulled away her eyes were wide but a smile crept across her lips.

Before her reserve of courage failed her Suvi gripped the collar of Peebee’s jacket and almost growled, “I need you. Right. Now.”


	10. Revival Sequence

Sara Ryder sat at her desk, finally finishing the reports she’d been putting off, as she hit the ‘submit’ button she leant back in her seat, grabbing her morning coffee which was still, thankfully, warm.

“Productive start to our 1000th day in Andromeda?” Lexi smiled, she was still tucked up in bed, data pad in hand reading an Angaran physiology text book.  
“I’ve let things slide” Ryder replied, “need to get back into good habits, my ‘to do’ list is getting out of hand, you’re too much of a distraction Dr T’Perro.” Sara grinned, whilst failing to supress a yawn as she stretched. Setting down her now empty mug Sara padded over to the bed, perching on the edge to lay a soft kiss on Lexi’s forehead.

“You don’t get to blame your procrastination on me Pathfinder” Lexi replied playfully, she let her fingers drift to Ryders exposed forearm where she traced patterns in the downy hairs. Sara found Lexi’s lips waiting for hers, she was surprised when the doctor pulled her deeper, the whisper of a moan catching in her throat as she dragged her fingernails down Ryder’s arm, with just enough pressure to communicate her wanting.

Sara’s Omni-tool chimed with an incoming alert, she only allowed messages filtered as ‘urgent’ to disturb her. 

“it’s still early” Lexi breathed catching the delicate skin below Sara’s ear in her teeth, “ignore it.”  
“I thought you weren’t a distraction” Sara muttered as she guided Lexi back into the waiting embrace of the pillows. As Lexi’s hands found their way to Sara’s back, deepening their sensual kiss, tongues dancing lazily, Ryder managed to infiltrate the covers, her fingertips finding the warm, sensitive skin of Lexi’s inner thigh.

Ryder’s Omni-tool buzzed again, with an alarm Sara hadn’t heard before, an incessant barrage of noise and vibrations.

Lexi released her lover, admitting defeat, “Goddess, just deal with it” she huffed.

Sara stood up, feeling a little light headed as a substantial volume of blood had pooled one particular area, she opened her Omni-Tool to read the urgent correspondence.  
The message was simple, but had been heavily encrypted:

_Initiate Project Adiona._

Her confusion must have shown, “what is it?” Lexi asked.  
“A calendar invite, but encrypted, it just says to Initiate Project Adiona” Sara frowned in confusion.  
“Pathfinder,” announced SAM “one of your father’s memories is available to view in SAM node.”  
Lexi and Sara stared at one another, “errm, I thought we were done with that SAM?”  
“Apparently not Sara.”  
Ryder shrugged her shoulders at Lexi, “Go, I’ll meet you on the Tempest later” Dr T’Perro sighed. 

\-------------------  
   
Something about SAM node always made the hairs on Sara’s arms stand up, it wasn’t that it was cold more that the air seemed to whisper with secrets, it made her nervous if nothing else.

“Come on then SAM show me what you’ve got”  
“Initializing”

Sara found herself viewing the world from her father’s perspective, this always made her feel weird, she cleared her thoughts to focus on the scene before her, trying not to get distracted by the revelation of yet more unknowns in her father’s life.

The comms terminal on her father’s desk flashed into life, Jien Garson’s face appearing.  
“Good Morning Alec” her tone was warm but also rushed, like she had a hundred things to do and they should all have been completed yesterday.  
“Jien” Alec acknowledged.  
“The research for Project Adiona is secure aboard the Nexus, Kesh will take you to it when the time comes, we have to keep this strictly between us, I’m concerned that Tevos will have infiltrated the Initiative and even when we arrive in Andromeda her far reaching arm may still yet interfere.” Garson paused, her next words were weighted even though she knew Alec would take the responsibility seriously, “you’re the only one I trust with this Alec, the project must remain hidden until completion.”  
“I understand Jien, just give me the word when to progress.”

Sara found herself back in SAM node, “is that it?” she asked SAM incredulously, although she already knew the answer.  
“Affirmative, Sara” came his curt reply.

As Sara strode out of the room she called her pilot “Kallo, plot a course to the Nexus, I want us in the air in 30, can you also contact Kesh I need to speak with her urgently upon arrival regarding a replacement engineer for the Tempest” strictly speaking this was true, Gil had taken his leave of the Tempest following the birth of his son, Dylan, Sara was yet to even start reviewing the stack of CVs which sat on her desk.

“Right away Pathfinder, the Tempest is resupplied and ready to fly.” Sara smiled as she heard the excitement in Kallo’s voice, he was made to fly and the pure joy he brought to his role was often a welcome relief to the pressure the Pathfinder team felt.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------  
The Nexus was finally a place of hope, people moved with purpose, talking animatedly, the scars of the first fourteen months before the arrival of the Hyperion were healing. Granted the Initiative wasn’t out of the woods yet but with the outposts flourishing and Meridian providing a permanent home for humanity the focus was shifting away from surviving and more to building a sustainable home.

Nakmor Kesh stood at the Tempest’s docking bay a look of concern crisscrossed her features.

“Good to see you Pathfinder” her tone steady.  
“Kesh!” Sara exclaimed, surprised to see the krogan had come to meet her off the ship “I would have come to your office” Ryder added.  
“You’ve asked your crew to remain on the ship, I believed our meeting to be urgent.”

Sara nodded, they were alone in the corridor separating the landing pad from the main immigration hall. Sara dug in her pockets for a scrap of paper and handed it to Kesh, who took it and stared at the single word written: Adiona  
“Come” she said simply.

Sara followed, the steady, measured steps of Kesh, they walked in silence deep into the bowels of the Nexus, Ryder quickly became disorientated, some of the areas passed still showed the signs of the initial foray with the Scourge.

With echoing steps down narrow, deserted corridors Kesh finally came to a stop. “This is it” Kesh stated, Sara tried hard not to let her frustration show, this day was starting to infuriate her, the pair faced the dead end of a barely lit access duct.

Sara decided to play along “errm, Kesh, it’s a wall.”

Kesh smiled “you’ve no idea how much I’ve been looking forward to this” the Krogan Super Intendant turned to face the wall and drew herself up to her full height, she threw her weight backwards before smashing her skull into the surface in front of her.

The whole wall erupted in a cloud of dust and debris, Ryder simply rolled her eyes, careful not to get caught of course.  
Kesh stepped back allowing Ryder the first view into the void beyond. The bright light of the hidden room a stark contrast to the corridor. Sara carefully stepped through the rubble, the change was instant, the air felt cold, like stepping into a cold store but the very particles were still, the pressure of the very walls seemed to depress her ear drums.

Three supply crates with some kind of advanced locking mechanism stood stacked in one corner, the rest of the room was dominated by a large black box. The outer surface seemed to be covered in some form of rubber compound, the only markings were stickers reading ‘fragile’ and ‘keep upright’. Standing about two meters high it reminded Sara of an antique fridge freezer. Sara pinched the bridge of her nose before running her hand through her hair, this is fucking weird, the only coherent thought she was having.

“Going to open it?” Kesh asked, nodding towards the obvious looking handle.  
“Nope” Sara stated, “can we get it to the Tempest, we’ve no idea what the hell Jien Garson was up to, let’s try and keep it contained.”  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------  
“Clear of Nexus control, powering down engines, we are silent and steady.”  
“Thanks Kallo” Sara responded via the comms system, “nobody is to enter the cargo bay upper or lower levels until I give the all clear.”  
“Affirmative Pathfinder.”

Sara surveyed the cargo bay one last time, apart from the Nomad and the secret cargo from the Nexus the space was empty. The crew had worked quickly to stow crates and equipment in other parts of the ship, a precaution in case the hold needed to be vented.

Ryder picked up her helmet, the cargo bay suddenly appearing in sharp contrast as her visor optimised to the lighting conditions, it clicked into place and the oxygen supply started to flow.

“Well, here goes” she thought.

The rubberised material on the chest seemed to act as a stealth shield, scrambling scanners, all SAM had been able to determine was the unit had some form of independent power supply.

Sara held her breath as a gloved hand reached out to the take the heavy industrial handle, her fingers wrapping around, thumb pressing the button on the pivot point. It was a smooth action to turn the lever ninety degrees counter-clockwise, a hiss and click, crisp despite the helmet. White pixels flashed across the front of the unit, flickering erratically until they eventually organised themselves:

_Revival Sequence Initiated._

Ryder stared for a moment, her hand still outstretched, eyes focused on the flashing full stop. No. Fucking. Way.

“Lexi!” Sara yelled, already ripping off her gloves and helmet “med kit NOW.”  
Dr T’Perro ran into the cargo bay carrying an emergency response kit, she was calm but totally alert taking in the scene before her, except there wasn’t a scene, just Sara and a crate.

“What’s going on?” 

Sara nodded towards the chest “it’s a stasis pod” Ryder’s mouth had gone dry, Jien Garson had gone to pretty extreme lengths to keep this person hidden, either they were very important or very dangerous.

_Revival Sequence Complete._

The unit vented a white cloud of cold gas, the coolth tumbling over itself as if it couldn’t wait to escape, the door swung open easily on its hinges to reveal the occupant within.  
Lexi already had her Omni-tool open “human, female, late twenties, no signs of injury, scar tissue consistent with shrapnel wounds and three ribs were cracked at some point.” 

Ryder took it all in, but not quite hearing it, the woman in the pod wasn’t moving, the Alliance uniform she was wearing was pressed and inspection ready, although a slight film of frost covered the black wool of the beret. None of this caught Sara’s attention though, it was the metal cuffs which held the occupant’s arms in place, despite stasis the bruising of the forearms shone livid against tan skin.

“She’s biotic, Serrice Council implant…” Lexi trailed off, “Ryder, I’m picking up high levels of sedative in her system.”

Sara looked at Lexi, “sedative and shackles, hidden behind a wall of a Nexus service tunnel, why do I feel like she didn’t willingly sign up to the Initiative?”  
Lexi shook her head “deal with that later, release the restraints she’s starting to come round, the sedative has implications to the revival process, her vitals aren’t stabilising and her core temperature is too low.”

Somewhere on her way to death Robyn got lost, the buzz of an irritating alarm clock jarred in the depths of her head, she reached out, trying to turn it off but her arms felt heavy and besides, she was dead anyway. The blinding white light, flashes of orange, more buzzing, whispers her ears couldn’t translate too far away for her to hear properly, besides she was dying.

She could feel the cold take her, as though her very soul had been replaced with the empty void of space, her body weighed heavy, dragging her further and further down into the cold depths, darkness caressed her mind, the air felt like a razor in her lungs, each clawing breath slicing her insides to ribbons. So, this is death, she thought.  
Her eyes fluttered open but the grey blurs meant nothing to her, she felt the pressure on her forearms release, their cold, iron grip had seared her skin raw, blistering. The pull of the deep was too great, let this be the final descent, let death catch me. 

Robyn, unseeing eyes open, fell forward, knees buckling the reflex to place her hands out caught her on all fours. The jarring shock ripped through her, organs convulsing lurid bile frothed from her onto the floor. She keeled sideways, slowly, like an ancient oak swaying dangerously in a hurricane. Is this death she thought, let it be death, the cold is too much.

“Quickly Sara help me get her up”

Ryder grabbed Robyn’s arm, pulling it over her shoulder whilst she wrapped her other arm around the Lieutenants waist, Lexi took the other side and they hurried to move the lifeless woman out of the cargo bay, her boots dragging on the floor.

“Your cabin Sara” Lexi said urgently, they moved quickly down the length of the ship, entering the Pathfinders quarters Lexi led the way to the bed, they turned and tried to lay Robyn down as gently as they could.

“Strip her” Lexi stated as she headed towards the en-suite.  
“What?”  
“Strip her Pathfinder” Lexi shook her head, she loved Sara but sometimes she could be such a dork.  
“Right, oh, okay.” Sara set to work unlacing boots, removing socks and pulling off trousers. The top half was a little tricky but luckily Lexi returned to help. 

“Sara, pick her up, into the shower, don’t change the temperature, keep her upright.”

Ryder nodded, it was awkward to hoist the woman into her arms whilst wearing full armour, on the battlefield you just throw the injured over your shoulder, Sara doubted Lexi would approve of such bedside manner.

Robyn couldn’t think for the static, the tremors which shook her body, she’d never experienced cold like it, she didn’t think death would be cold, she didn’t think she’d feel.  
A noise like thunder hit her ears, more bright light but shapes forming, “why are they doing this?” she thought, prolonging her death, what was it she’d done to justify this torture, let it just be over. She realised her captor had only just started with the torment.

Sara gingerly carried Robyn into the shower, the water was tepid but as the first drops peppered the Lieutenants skin the passive body in Ryder's arms withered and convulsed in agony.

Robyn couldn’t contain the howl of anguish that escaped her as a thousand white hot needles thrust at her body, the napalm touch short circuiting her nervous system, the air burning her lungs.

Sara fought to hold Robyn, she all but dropped her into a seating position and pulled the woman close to her chest, keeping her mouth out of the spray. The rivers of warm water streaming down the controls of Robyn’s body. Sara, soaked, turned to Lexi who stood behind her, “what the fuck?”

“Even tepid water will feel like it’s burning, stay there it’ll get better, I’ll be back in a moment.” Lexi left Sara cradling their new arrival, her sobs already receding to hitched breaths.

Lexi marched through the ship, climbing the ladder to the upper deck as quickly as she could, she entered the hydroponics lab to find Cora sat at her desk, datapad in hand. “I need you” Lexi stated simply.

Without question Cora stood up and followed the Doctor, nobody questioned T’Perro. “Can you strip down to your underwear and get into Sara’s bed?”

Cora choked, Lexi rolled her eyes, “Just do it Lieutenant, your body heat is about to save someone’s life.”


	11. Wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggest you acquire a double decker or other comfort food of choice, the angst train is ready to roll.

“So, great party you're having Ryder” Cora quipped, she lay on her side, back pressed against the shivering front of the Tempest’s new arrival.  
“Oh yeah, tell me about it Harper, exactly what I needed, another one of Jien Garson’s bright ideas.” Sara was frustrated, whilst her primary concern was the survival of the woman whose back pressed into her, she couldn’t help but be irked by another secret, another AI fuck up.

“Know who she is?”  
“Female, Alliance, Biotic. That’s all we’ve got.”  
“Engineer. Hey maybe this is Gil’s replacement.” Cora laughed.  
“How do you know?” Sara asked, maybe things were looking up after all.  
“The patch on her uniform” Cora nodded to the neatly folded clothes which were piled on the back of the couch, “A.T.E, Alliance Tactical Engineers, responsible for developing anything from N7 weapons to new drive cores.”  
“Okay so she’s a big deal?”  
“Potentially,” Cora confirmed, “only the best and brightest got into ATE, on basic you were warned not to piss them off, they have a habit of blowing shit up.”  
“She sounds perfect, I’m sure Kallo will love her” Sara couldn’t help but laugh, imagining the Salarian’s disgruntled face when she told him they’d replaced Gil with a bomb disposal expert who knew nothing about ships.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Lexi coming in to monitor progress.  
“When are you taking your turn melting the ice cube?” Sara asked  
“You know my body temperature is too low, you’ve complain about my cold feet enough times Pathfinder.” Lexi teased, she checked her Omni-tool for the latest scan results and continues, “she’s making good progress, the sedative is filtering through her system, I’d say she was ‘out of the woods’.”

Ryder smiled, she loved it when Lexi tried to use human sayings and idioms, there was something adorably cute about it that made her go a little weak around the knees.  
“Right, Cora, stay here, I need to brief the rest of the crew.”  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Ryder gathered the team in the meetings room, the crew all looked a little nervous, the Pathfinders actions had been a little erratic but they’d been through a lot, they trusted her judgement.

Sara began, “this morning I received an encrypted message to initiate ‘Project Adiona’, this was a trigger meant for my father, who appeared to at least know what the project was. Jien Garson took the decision to entrust the completion of the project to him and left a nav point for the research he was to continue.” Sara paused, so far so good, she pinched the bridge of her nose, not quite ready to say the words that felt so utterly ridiculous.

“The research was well hidden in the Nexus, Kesh had to put her head through a wall,” Drack laughed, muttering “that’s my girl” under his breath.  
Ryder continued, “it turns out the ‘research’ Jien had secured was actually a person, a woman, who appears to be an Alliance Engineer, she was in a self-contained stasis pod.”

Her crew stared at her in disbelief.

Scott spoke, “are you telling me there was someone hidden on the Nexus? What if that message had never got to you? How long would she have been there, undiscovered?” 

Sara raised her hand and spoke softly, “I know, and that’s not the worst of it, she was sedated and shackled, I don’t think she came willingly.”  
“This may be, problematic” Jaal stated, his air of calm bristled.  
“You don’t say kid, geez can you imagine how pissed she’s gonna be when she wakes up” Drack rumbled.

“Exactly,” Sara cut in, “we have no idea what she went through, we have no idea if she even knows what’s happened. At the moment, she’s recovering from cryo, the sedative messed up the revival sequence so she’s near hypothermic. I think we can safely say when she comes round she’ll be hostile, disorientated and scared.”

Sara shook her head, this was such a mess, “can I ask that you all stay at your stations, and don’t gather in groups, she won’t know we’re friendly, if necessary non-lethal force may have to be used, myself, Cora and Peebee will take on a patrol shift to deploy stasis fields if necessary.”

Ryder shifted her tone and looked apologetically at Jaal, “Jaal, I need you to keep a low profile, until we get her up to speed I think running into a new species would be the final straw.”

“I quite agree,” Jaal stated, “I would rather not go through, how do you say, ‘first contact’ in a confined space, I shall lock myself in the tech lab until you are able to undertake a formal introduction.”  
Sara nodded, relieved at his understanding, “now we just wait for her to wake up.”  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
Despite herself Cora had fallen into a dreamless sleep, the steady rhythmical breathing of the woman curled into her back oddly comforting, she barely registered the strong arm which draped itself over her, the gentle pull, the feeling of security and safety flickering across her mind before sleep called for her once more.

Robyn dreamt, she was swimming upwards but could feel the rotating grip of the backwash pulling her down, she could almost see the surface, the sunlight twinkling tantalisingly close above her, the relief as she felt her face finally break the surface tension, spluttering before another wave could fill her lungs. She lay, washed up in the shallows, feeling every tiny piece of grit against her skin, the sands cool touch on her back a contrast to the bright heat of the sun enveloping her front. She opened her eyes, this wasn’t death.  
Robyn took a moment to steady her breathing, closing her eyes and counting to five. She ran through an internal diagnostic, everything seemed to be attached, her fingers and toes still wiggled and nothing except an intense hunger gnawed at her insides.

Swallowing the rising panic, she opened her eyes and took in the surroundings, the cabin was quiet, dimly lit and only the slight murmur of the ventilation system could be heard. Focusing on her training Robyn thought to control her pulse, taking comfort in the control she could exert.  
With a swift, silent motion she slipped out of bed, bare feet grounded against the shallow pile of the carpet. She pulled on her clothes, keeping to the shadows and avoided waking the sleeping woman she didn’t recognise.

Picking up her boots she silently exited the room, the corridor before her lay still and empty, she knew this corridor, the layout, anger threatened to overwhelm her but instead she moved without hesitance. 

The cargo bay was oddly sparse, the open casket of her cryo pod still in place, it was the crates next to it that concerned the Lieutenant. She deftly picked her target and moved seamlessly to the shadows, although she knew she wouldn’t be disturbed, all the crew hopefully sleeping the hours away.

Robyn said a silent ‘thank you’ to Marc Vaughan as she pulled off her fatigues and donned her compressive under armour. The package she’d collected from her brief Citadel visit finally useful. She took out the short sleeved armoured top and pulled it on, flexible plating in a skin tight rubberised material made the stealth suit light and silent. Designed to enable total freedom of movement whilst enhancing biotic ability, the armour synced with her implant, the compression of the kit harmonising the cells in her body allowing the dark energy to flow unrestricted and sharpening her senses.

The Lieutenant pulled on the matching trousers before slipping into and lacing her boots, she clicked a fresh heat sink into her pistol and holstered her sidearm.  
For the next hour Robyn paced the ship silently, moving through engineering, syncing her Omni-tool to the ship, smiling as she found the fingerprints of her own coding.  
She observed the turian who slept in the armoury, tangled up in a sheet, mementos of home littered shelves. The old krogan warrior snored at the table in the galley, dreaming no doubt of battles gone by.

Robyn avoided the crew quarters, too much of a risk, instead she lightly climbed to the meeting room, the woman she’d woken next to wasn’t Alec Ryder, she needed to find him, she needed to find Jien.

Creeping into the space Robyn found a woman and an Asari asleep on separate couches, the Asari held the mark of a medic, not her target. The woman, a trigger of recognition, a scent, during the burning of her skin, she was there.

Sara wasn’t sure at what moment she fully woke up, had it been when Robyn had grabbed her by the front of her shirt, lifting her cleanly up off the couch. Or maybe it was the impact which knocked the wind out of her as her back was slammed onto the meeting room table. She tried to cry out but the woman who had so easily infiltrated her dreams shook her head and placed a finger to Ryder’s lips.

“I have no fight with you” Robyn’s voice a husky whisper like purple smoke from a beach bonfire, despite her words the heavy grip on Sara’s collar didn’t waver.  
“You need to take me to Jien Garson.”  
Ryder’s eyes widened, she tried to keep her voice level and calm, “I can’t” the arm holding her down tensed, a ripple of blue cascading downwards caressing Sara’s cheek, “she’s dead, she died when the Nexus arrived, murdered.”

Robyn drew her pistol aiming it behind her.

“Stand down Doctor”

Sara hadn’t even noticed Lexi move, she tried to make eye contact, willing her to back down, pleading with her to stay calm.  
Thankfully Lexi held up her hands and moved away, staring at Ryder and the woman in front of her.

“Alec Ryder?” Robyn asked, probably the only person Jien would confide her sins to. The Lieutenant saw the hurt in Sara’s eyes, Sara opened her mouth to speak but no words came out.  
Robyn softened her tone, “how long ago?”  
“Over 2 years.”  
“Why now?”  
“I don’t know. Just an encrypted message and a nav point, to initiate ‘Project Adiona.’”

Robyn’s world fell away from her, anger, hurt and frustration making her shake, she silently released Sara and placed her pistol on the counter, offering a hand to the woman she’d previously been restraining.

Ryder looked her in the eye, she desperately wanted to say something but could feel the pulsing rage emanating from the woman in front of her, she didn’t say anything as Robyn turned from her and walked away.

“Well at least she’s awake” Sara sighed.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn entered the Bridge, sealing the door behind her, she checked the airlock and escape pod for occupants but all they both stood empty, as did the helm and science station.  
It took all her reserve not to cry out in anguish, what the fuck was Jien thinking? All this and she’s fucking dead anyway.

She needed to think, she needed to take control.

Opening her Omni-tool her fingers danced over the screen as she wove her way through the Tempest’s systems. She smiled to herself as she dialled in the 64-bit clearance code shaking her head, “predictability gets you killed Lucille” she muttered.

Robyn powered down all non-essential systems and barred access to engineering, terminals around the Tempest were locked except for the lightest functionality. The ship wasn’t going anywhere without her say so.

For the first time she felt safe, nobody was going to pull the rug from under her feet. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------  
It didn’t take long for the Tempest’s crew to career into the meeting room, Sara sat with her head in her hands as her team scrambled over one another.

“She’s gone,” Cora stammered, “I woke up and she’d gone.”  
“Why can’t I access any terminals?” Suvi asked.  
“I’m locked out of the bridge.” Kallo added.

Sara stood up and raised her hands “please, calm down.”

The room fell into a fidgety silence.

“SAM, an update? What’s going on.”  
“Sara, Adiona has taken control of all Tempest’s systems, and locked herself on the bridge.” SAM stated.  
“Why didn’t you stop her?” Sara asked in exasperation.  
“She accessed the ships systems using the approved protocol, she had the passcode Pathfinder.”  
“She had the passcode, what passcode, I don’t even have the passcode, does Kallo or Gil?” she threw her arms up in disbelief, this just gets better and better she thought.

“If I may Sara,” Kallo interjected, “only Lucille, the lead designer would know such a thing.”

The colour drained from Suvi’s face, she felt her skin suddenly go clammy, Peebee who was stood next to her nudged her gently, whispering, “you okay?”  
“Fine, fine” nodded Suvi.

“SAM what are our options?” Scott asked.  
“I recommend waiting.”  
“Waiting?” Scott scoffed.  
“Yes” SAM explained, “Adiona has full access to the ship, she is currently downloading and reading all the mission reports and logs of the Tempest in addition to newsfeeds relating to the arrival of the Nexus in Andromeda. At present, she is not a threat.”

“So, what we just sit around and twiddle our thumbs whilst she educates herself?” Peebee said, not bothering to hide her displeasure with the situation.  
“Let’s all calm down” Vetra stepped in, “she hasn’t threatened anyone, she could have spaced us all if she’d wanted to, so let’s just see how this plays out.”  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn sat in the science officers chair, feet resting on the terminal, the clutter of mugs and datapads oddly comforting, there was a familiarity about it that she couldn’t quite place.

She scanned the data feeds on her Omni-tool, briefly developing a potted history of the Pathfinder team’s missions, details of the Scourge, first contact with the Kett and Angara, outpost viability and the exiles of Kadara, it hadn’t been an easy ride.

The twist of guilt she felt as her thoughts shifted to the Milky Way and everything she’d left behind, the war that she knew was coming. Robyn froze. She looked around the workstation once more, taking in all the details, the mugs with the final dregs of tea in them, always a mouthful left undrunk, datapads, scraps of notes, the smell of honey and oatmeal, of, “Suvi” she whispered the word in disbelief. Picking up a datapad she scanned the contents, it was a 600-page paper on Heleus fauna and flora, compiled by a Dr. S Anwar, Tempest Science Liaison.

Robyn stood up and paced the bridge, “fuck.” She unlocked the door to and sat on the lip of the navigation platform, losing herself in the swirling tendrils of the Scourge and waited.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi was in the galley calmly making a stack of sandwiches, whilst her initial reaction was to vomit in shock, now she felt almost at peace. She’d thought she was reading too much into it but a look at the crates in the hold had confirmed her suspicion and then the music had started.

As soon as the first melodic plucks of the acoustic guitar had rung through the ship she knew. All at once she was transported back to ISSAC, back to Robyn’s arms, back to her singing along to ancient folk music, dancing in the living room, drinking cold cider and dreaming of beaches and waves.

She dug out two mugs and her favourite tea. Peebee and Sara walked in.

“Hungry?” Peebee asked looking at the pile of food.  
“No but she will be” Suvi stated.  
“You’re going up there?” Sara asked.  
“Well someone should show some hospitality.” She picked up the plate of sandwiches and two mugs, leaving the galley and taking the elevator to the upper deck.

Outside the bridge she prepared herself to see a ghost but couldn’t help the smile as she stepped through the door, instantly recognising the silhouette of the woman sat staring into space.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn heard the door open and the measured gait of Suvi approaching, she daren’t look behind her in case it wasn’t real. Not until a pair of white boots stood level with her hip did she finally look up into the face of the woman, who she’d said goodbye to only the day before.

Robyn felt the lump in her throat and the rush of blood through her ears, with shaking hands she took the proffered plate and mug, setting it down next to her, too hot to drink.  
Suvi cautiously lowered herself down, cradling her mug in her hands, her knee gently touching Robyn’s.

“So, you’re not dead.” Suvi whispered, she couldn’t help the laughter that slipped out too, this was too surreal.  
Robyn took another bite out of a sandwich, swallowing hard, “nope, bit of a shock if I’m honest” humour was the only way they were going to get through this.

“How did you know?” Robyn asked, continuing to plough through her food, ravenous, she felt like a bottomless pit.

Suvi looked at the Lieutenant, “are you serious?” Robyn stopped mid chew, turning to face her, Suvi continued smiling, “there is nobody in the universe alive or dead who would think nothing of stealing a highly advanced space ship and then play Jack Johnson through the PA.”

“What happened Robyn?”

Robyn shook her head, brushing crumbs off her trousers, “I don’t know, literally the last thing I remember,” her voice broke, she wasn’t sure she could say it, she certainly couldn’t look Suvi in the eye. 

Finally, she sighed, “the last thing I remember is walking out of our apartment, the guy who delivered the groceries, he was an assassin, I thought I was done.”  
The panic and anger still simmered just below her surface, she struggled to contain her body, feeling the tremors starting to shake at her core. “Then I wake up here.” Robyn stared down at the freezer burn and bruising on her wrists, “they sedated and shackled me into cryo, I must have struggled at some point, but I don’t remember.”  
Suvi laid a hand gently on Robyn’s forearm, it took all the Lieutenants willpower not to jump at the touch. Suvi closed her eyes as she felt the familiar contours beneath her fingers, how many times she’d wished to have one last moment with these arms.

“They blew up your lab, said it was an accident, the heat was too intense they said, couldn’t identify a body in the debris” Suvi’s words tumbled out as the flood of emotion came thundering through her, “there was a memorial, full honours, I met your parents, they thrust the folded flag and medal into me hands and entrusted me with taking their daughter beyond the stars.”

Robyn didn’t attempt to stop the tears which wound paths down her cheeks and made the world shift and blur.  
They both wiped their tears. “And now you’re here” Suvi stated, before laughing “and this is really, really weird.”

Robyn smiled weakly back at her, “yup, that’s certainly one word for it.”

The pair sat in comfortable silence, finishing their tea, Robyn set her mug down, “I should probably introduce myself properly, and give Kallo his ship back.”

They both stood up, accidentally trying to occupy the same space. Suvi didn’t make an attempt to stop herself falling into Robyn’s arms, their bodies finding old patterns which still matched. Robyn wrapped her arms around Suvi, closing her eyes against soft hair, inhaling warmth.

Suvi didn’t mean for it to happen, she turned her head and found Robyn’s mouth fractions from her own and it was too late, she crashed into those lips, that she knew so well but whose memory was worn and faded, the light from the distant star glinting off the moistened surface of welcoming tongues. Her fingers found that oh so familiar place at the base of Robyn’s neck, playing in the hair she’d so often dreamed of.

Robyn hadn’t expected it; all her senses were overwhelmed but comforted by the familiarity. Until she noticed something different, a smell and taste, like gunpowder and spice. She pulled away searching Suvi’s gaze for an answer and saw it, the realisation of what she’d done, the echo of guilt making her body tense against Robyn’s.

The Lieutenant sighed and rested her forehead against Suvi’s, “is she here? On the ship?” A barely noticeable nod of affirmation. Robyn gently pulled Suvi into her, letting the science officer cling onto her form, she rested her chin on the top of her head. “I’m sorry” she breathed, not entirely sure if she was apologising for leaving, or for coming back.


	12. The Worst Day

Once again, the crew of the Tempest found themselves in the meeting room, Suvi having haled them all, including Jaal. She walked with Robyn through the ship, keeping a respectful distance, she didn’t trust herself.

As the pair came into view the hubbub died down and all eyes fell to the Lieutenant. She cleared her throat, calm and confident she thought, calm and confident.

“Hi, erm, sorry for hijacking your ship” she looked apologetically at the woman she knew to be Sara Ryder, the Human Pathfinder, all her confidence gone, maybe it had never been there in the first place, her hand went to her neck, “kinda having a really bad day.”

Sara looked at her, she saw a reflection of herself, the barely holding wall against the onslaught of emotion and confusion as the world you knew was torn to pieces beyond your control, she’d been there, she knew the journey this woman would go on.  
“The worst day I’d say” Sara smiled.

“The worst” Robyn agreed.  
“Well, for what it’s worth, welcome aboard the Tempest, today marks the 1,001st day of the Andromeda Initiative arriving in the Heleus cluster, although not all of us have been here that long, as I’m sure you’ve read.”

Robyn tried not to let the blush of embarrassment show.

Sara pretended not to notice, she’ll feel like a dork for her actions, she thought, but they were kind of justified, “formal introductions then; I’m Sara Ryder, Pathfinder…” Sara continued around the room introducing her team and giving a brief titbit of background, finally arriving at Jaal, who had taken a place to Robyn’s left.

The Lieutenant had done her best not to stare but she was fascinated by the creature, like she had been when she’d first met a Turian, Hanar or Drell.

“This is Jaal,” Sara indicated to the alien, “he’s Angaran, a native species of Heleus, Jaal acts as a liaison between the Angaran resistance, who opposed the Kett, and the Initiative, although that role has kindof become redundant since the Angaran’s took an embassy on the Nexus.”

Robyn turned to the Angaran, his imposing bulk masked by a softness, a quiet, gentlemanly demeanour. Robyn held out her hand and was relieved when Jaal took it, a firm and welcoming.

“It’s good to meet you,” his tone was much like his appearance, heavy in timbre but melodic, Robyn imagined she could listen to him talk for hours, soothed by his very presence, he continued, “I wonder if I may greet you the traditional Anagaran way?” He asked.

Robyn noticed the rest of the crew were grinning, she met Jaal’s gaze, “sure.”

Jaal, who hadn’t let go of her outstretched hand, pulled her towards him, enveloping her in a tight hug. All at once Robyn relaxed into him, turning her face away from the onlookers, never had she been so relieved to be held. She was always the strong one, always in control, always chasing away other people’s demons, it was probably only a moment but it felt like an eternity of tenderness.

“Welcome to Heleus,” he murmured, “you will find hope and beauty here too, in time.”  
“Thank you” Robyn’s hushed reply.

Swallowing the ball of emotion which wedged itself in her throat she turned back to the room, with a deep breath she started to talk, it was her turn now.

“I’m Staff Lieutenant Robyn Harris, an Engineer in the Alliance, however I fulfil two roles. Firstly, as an Alliance officer I specialise in stealth tactics and recon, biotic guerrilla warfare if you will.” Robyn noted the blond woman raise an eyebrow, something about the way she stood, it was as though she was thinking too hard about what position to hold, learning a new skill, making a conscious effort. She pushed it from her mind and continued.

“Fundamentally though, I’m a scientist, an Alliance scholarship meant I could study, I have a degree in Physics and Masters in FTL technology. Much of my work involved the reverse engineering of Prothean technology. I then spent three years building the SSV Normandy.”

Robyn paused to look at her audience, a stunned silence met her, she blew out her cheeks, going on to explain.

“After the Normandy project, I took a place at the Inter Species Scientific Advancement Centre, ISSAC. I was attempting to reverse engineer more complex Prothean tech. As far as I’m concerned, the day before yesterday I left my apartment to go to my lab, now I’m here.” Robyn shrugged, the weight of her words sitting heavy inside her.

“What’s your connection to Jien Garson, to our father?” Scott asked.  
“ISSAC allows anonymous donors to sponsor research, it’s a grey area enabling more ‘sensitive’ undertakings. My work had two such sponsors, one was the Initiative. I didn’t know your father, I knew he was to be the Human Pathfinder and I assumed Jien would have confided in him, it was no more than a guess.”

“Hold on, I don’t believe Jien would kidnap you without a reason?” Scott continued

Robyn shifted, not sure how much to say, “like I say, my work had two donors, events in the Milky Way meant their purposes became at odds with one another. One wanted me to destroy my work, Jien wanted me to continue, I took an Oath to Serve with the Alliance, I was ready to face the war, I told Jien that I’d destroy the research, both sides were hunting me, but at the time it wasn’t Jien who had bugged my home or sent assassins to ISSAC. I didn’t anticipate Jien would take such drastic action, I underestimated her.”

Sara had her head in her hands, it was worse than she’d thought.

Vetra spoke up, “what were you working on?”  
Robyn shook her head, “No way” her tone steely and defiant, “I don’t know who you people are, I’ve already had my world ripped apart because of this, Jien is long dead, she was the only one who knew about any of this” she spat the words, “I never signed up for this, just drop me at the Nexus I’m sure they can find a use for an engineer, I’m done with this.” Robyn felt herself unravelling.

“Hey, no need for the angst, embrace the adventure” the room turned as one to stare at Peebee, Lexi groaned and Suvi tensed.  
Robyn turned to the Asari, “are you always like that?”  
“What?” Peebee asked, Robyn saw the brief look Suvi gave the woman, her stomach dropped, she felt the muscle in her jaw throb as she clenched her teeth.  
“Do you always show a total lack of emotional intelligence?”

Vetra laughed, “Oh Sara, she’s a keeper, please can she stay?”

Robyn’s eyes hadn’t left Peebee’s whose mouth was open slightly, not quite understanding what she’d done.  
“Embrace the Adventure. Is that what they sold you in the promotional material? And as for my angst Ms B’Sayle, you may have commitment issues but I don’t, you came here having said goodbye to the people you cared about. I didn’t get that choice.” Robyn slammed her fist into the table.

She snarled, “I really don’t need some punk ass asari giving me shit for not being over the moon at the prospect of a new life on the frontier. I knew my place, I’d made my choice, I was OK with taking up arms against what was coming, even though I knew I’d probably die. Jien Garson faked my death, my parents will never know what happened, they died thinking their daughter blew herself up in a fucking lab.”

Sara cringed as Peebee opened her mouth, she was willing the asari to stay silent, this wasn’t going to end well. “So be glad you’re alive, why would you want to stay behind anyway.”

Robyn threw up her arms turning away, fuck it, she thought, turning back around, “you really want to know?” her voice was dangerously quiet. “Two days ago, when I left my home, I said goodbye to the love of my life, my whole fucking world, I had to stay and fight for her, I had to try and make sure there was an Earth to call home if she ever came back.”

It was Kallo who connected the dots and whispered, “she’s here?” his eyes widened, he looked from Robyn to Suvi but before he could work out what this new piece of information meant Peebee had opened her mouth again.

“So, go find her” stated as if it were that simple.

Suvi wished the world would swallow her whole, this is not happening she thought, please let this be a horrific nightmare.

“I’m nearly three years behind, she’s moved on.” Robyn prayed that would be the last of it, let her just quietly leave the room and get on with rebuilding her life.

But no, “What, how do you know?” Suvi cringed at the innocence of Peebee’s question.

Robyn braced her arms against the meeting room table, the tension rocked her body as soft wisps of dark energy wrapped themselves dangerously around her arms. She dragged her eyes from the point on the table she’d been boring into and looked Peebee straight in the eye, let her see the anger and hurt, let her see the heart wrenching ache of love. When she spoke, her voice darted and whipped the air like a viper, barely more than a whisper, “because you’re fucking her.”

Robyn pushed herself away from the table, defeated, cold and empty, she turned and left the meeting room, desperate to be alone with her anger.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi felt the eyes of her crewmates on her, she didn’t know what to do, Sara took her by the arm and led her out of the meeting room and into the hydroponics lab, steering her into the seat by Cora’s desk. Sara sat on an upturned box and took Suvi’s hand in her own, “talk to me” she said kindly.

Then the tears came, the sobs which wrecked through Dr Anwar as the years of grief and loss, or wanting finally escaped the careful compartment she’d tried desperately to contain them in.

“Oh Ryder,” her breath catching with each sob, “she was everything to me, she was ‘the one’ god our time at ISSAC was perfect, roommates thrown together who fell in love. Then she died and I came to Andromeda with a hole the size of a galaxy in my heart.”

Suvi shook herself trying to get a grip, “then this thing with Peebee happened, the guilt of trying to be with someone else when I was” she corrected herself, “am, so in love with her.”

“As soon as she hacked the ship I knew Sara, I just knew, and now I’m full of conflict because being with her for a moment feels like perfection, and then there’s Peebee…” she trailed off.

Gathering herself one more, Suvi continued, Ryder could barely hear her words, “Earlier, on the Bridge, I kissed her, after thinking I never would ever again and it was better, just so… Right.”

Sara cleared her throat, love triangles weren’t really her speciality, “what do you need me to do? With Robyn, I mean you’re on my crew, you come first.”  
Suvi looked at her questioningly, “I’d never let my personal feelings impact the mission Sara, just do whatever is right for her, she’s been through enough.”  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn vaulted the railing of the upper cargo bay railing, landing on the lower deck in a pounce she primed herself charging at the black hulk of the stasis pod and slammed her fist into the side of it, her biotics exploding on impact, she felt the satisfying ricochet up her arm as the rubberised casing buckled beneath her knuckles the whole unit being flung across the deck.

“Hey, cool it” the blond woman, Cora, yelled across the room.  
“Now, now Cora, if the marine wants to blow of some steam let her” Scott strode in, putting on a confident swagger, he rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, flexing.  
“Playing with fire” Cora muttered out the side of her mouth.  
“I’ve got this” Scott replied.

Robyn turned to face the pair, saw the challenge Scott was laying down and smiled. She crossed her arms, grabbed the hem of her armoured shirt and peeled it up over her head, knowing full well he’d be staring at her chest and abs, accentuated by the compression shirt.

“What the fuck boy scout, you think the Alliance is all ‘Ooh-Ra’ and towel whips?” Robyn dropped her voice, let it purr out of her seducing Scott. She noticed his pupils dilate, saw him lick his lips as his mouth had gone dry.

“Told you” Cora muttered under her breath.

The Lieutenant walked carefully towards Scott, her eyes not leaving his, Scott held his breath as Robyn came closer, until they were toe to toe, he could see the flare of her biotics, he swallowed hard, “show me what you’ve got Ryder.” 

Robyn turned her back, took a step away, Scott had reached out to grab her shoulder, Robyn spun round, locking her hand around Ryder’s forearm, pulling him round and off balance, she deftly kicked his stumbling feet from under him letting go of his arm so he landed with a winded thud on the floor.  
It was more the smirk that fanned the fire in Scott, rather than finding himself on his back. Scott shifted his weight to his shoulders, trusting his hips into the air to whip his body upright onto his feet.

Now things get interesting Robyn thought, the pair facing each other, circling, weight on the balls of feet, arms out, each watching the other, baiting and luring.

A few testing touches, searching for an opportunity to strike, Robyn saw his frustration build, she gave Scott an opening, he took it and landed a glancing blow to her torso, it was worth it though as she lifted her knee into his gut followed by a right hook to the side of his face as he doubled over, the flecks of spit catching in the light.

Scott wiped his mouth on the back of his hand before charging at the Lieutenant, his shoulder and arm wrapping around her waist as she slammed into the wall. Fuck that felt good she thought. Her biotics flared as she pushed Ryder backwards, just enough to free herself.

They continued to spar, rapid hand to hand, blocks and jabs, blows traded but neither letting up. Cora crossed her arms as she leant against the wall watching, a smirk on her lips, Scott didn’t have a clue, this woman was totally in control, he only landed a blow if and when she wanted him to.

Robyn and Scott were breathing hard, the sweat starting to prickle on temples and arms, the rush of controlled aggression, figuring out your opponent. Robyn grinned as Scott caught her with a left hook, she felt the skin break above her right eyebrow, Ryder paused, concerned he’d lost control and crossed the line, he stepped to close, Robyn smirked and headbutted him square in the face, Scott’s nose spraying blood across his shirt, knocking him backwards and falling on his ass.

The pair looked at each other, a hesitant pause, then laughter, proper full on belly laughter as they both howled. Scott touched his nose before taking the hand Robyn held out for him.

“Good try boy scout, with a bit of practice you might be an okay sparring partner” Robyn winked.  
“Hey! I landed a few blows” Scott objected, all mock hurt and bloody nose.  
“Hate to break it to you little bro,” nobody had noticed Sara Ryder on the upper walkway, she’d watched the entire showdown, “she let you hit her.”  
Scott looked at Robyn who shrugged and smiled. “Both of you go and see Lexi, Lieutenant we need to talk when you’re done.”  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Lexi stood, arms crossed leaning against her desk when the pair walked in, despite the roll of her eyes Robyn saw the smile that pulled at the corners of her mouth.

“You first Scott, I need to do a full medical for the Lieutenant.”

Scott hopped onto the bed, legs dangling in the air, “It’s just a bloody nose Lexi, she barely touched me” he winked at Robyn who just laughed.  
“Hmmm, right, bit of advice for you Scott, don’t pick a fight with the woman who walks around in Commando armour.” Robyn blushed at her words.

As Lexi turned to gather some medi gel Robyn grabbed the bowl of warm water and flannel, she squeezed out the excess and stood in front of Scott. Carefully dabbing away the scarlet which was quickly congealing. Lexi watched them both. As Robyn rinsed the flannel she explained, “it’s a Navy thing, you can spar all you want, beat seven kinds of shit out of each other, but you’re a team, when all’s said and done, you take care of each other.” She tweaked Scott’s nose, “besides, I didn’t hit you hard enough to break anything” the cheeky half smile making Scott smirk.

After a scan from Lexi she dismissed Scott, who nodded a goodbye to Robyn, she returned his smile.

“You’ve made quite the impression on him, and not just bruises” Lexi’s tone was warm and friendly.

Robyn took up Scott’s previous position, Lexi started the scans, “Now you’re in Andromeda we need to do some paperwork, medical history etc.”  
“I could just send you them” Robyn stated simply, she opened her Omni-tool and mailed Lexi her entire Alliance service record including annual medicals, training logs, injury reports, mission summaries and appraisals.  
“Efficient” Lexi said, she didn’t know why but she liked this woman, Lexi suspected it was the wicked sharp sense of humour but there was something incredibly likeable about Lt. Harris.

As Lexi busied herself taking bloods Sara entered the med bay. “How are things looking Dr T’Perro?”  
“Clean bill of health Pathfinder” something about the tone between them made Robyn look up, she caught Sara’s eye and noticed the beginnings of a blush rise in her cheeks, they exchanged a knowing nod.

“Thanks for not killing my brother, hand to hand was never his strong point.”  
Robyn grinned, “it’d help if he stopped looking at my tits long enough to see where he was punching.”

Lexi couldn’t help but snort, nearly ploughing the needle into the wrong part of Robyn’s arm.  
“Okay, you’re done.”  
“Thank you, Doctor, for everything, I know I’ve been a bit of a handful so far, but well, thank you.”  
Lexi didn’t reply just nodded, catching Sara’s eye and smiling.

Robyn slipped off the bed and fell in step with Sara, taking the lift to the upper deck they walked wordlessly to engineering, the hum of the drive core making the hairs on Robyn’s arm stand up.

“So” Sara started, “today has been a little bit crazy, and whilst I can appreciate some of what you’re going through, there are other aspects that I obviously can’t comprehend.” Robyn opened her mouth to speak but Sara held up her hand, “I know about Tevos and how the Asari Republic fit into everything, I know about the Reapers, but I don’t see the link between you and those two factors.”

“If I tell you, it’ll leave you with a decision to make, Sara I trust you and your judgement but believe me when I tell you I’m only guessing at what Jien had planned.” Robyn sighed, it was time to show her hand.  
“Let’s take it one step at a time, start from the beginning.”

“Okay” this was it Robyn thought, now or never, “I reverse engineered a mass relay.”  
Sara stared at her, “I was not expecting that” she stated meekly.

Robyn smiled, “so the long story is that the mass relays and Citadel were assumed to be Prothean, except when I started work it didn’t figure. The language and structure was similar but fundamentally different, the mass relays predate the Protheans.”  
Sara felt the colour drain from her face, “The Reapers.”  
Robyn nodded, “yeah, do you know who Adiona is Sara?”

The Pathfinder shook her head, Robyn continued, “Abeona and Adiona were Roman goddesses, a couple, Abeona provided safe passage and luck for the outward journey, Adiona is the Goddess of safe return.”

“Jien planned it all along” Sara whispered, “she planned to build a relay here, to link back to the Milky Way.” 

Robyn nodded, “when I traced my funding to the AI I knew what she was planning, I thought it was a pipe dream, never imagined I’d actually be successful, then when Tevos got cold feet, well you know how that ends.”

“Hold on, why did the Republic put a bounty on you?”

“After the Battle of the Citadel the Asari poured additional funding into the Initiative, for ‘continuity of civilisation’ if we build a link back to the Milky Way, there is the possibility the Reapers would follow.”

“That’s six hundred years ago, how is this even relevant now, relays act in pairs, how would we ever get back.”

“I left a copy of my work in the Milky Way, with someone who would live long enough to complete the project if we won the war.”

“So, you’re saying, we could build a relay and go back to the Milky Way?”

“In theory, yes, there are a lot of ifs and buts, as well as the fundamental question of, would you want to?”

“Well that’s a question for another day, jesus Harris, no wonder Jien kidnapped you.”

“Nothing justifies her actions” Robyn spat.

Sara reached out and put her hand on Robyn’s shoulder, “hey, I know, she had no right and I know this is crazy for you and I can’t imagine how angry you are, I know you didn’t ask for this.”

Robyn gulped away a sob, tears burned, her brain sagged with exhaustion. She buried her head in her hands, getting herself back under control, “Sorry.”

“Look, erm, I know there is a whole world of pain for you around our science officer,” Robyn looked at Sara, “but, well, we need an engineer, and it appears you have an intimate knowledge of the Tempest.” Robyn shifted uncomfortably still a little embarrassed by her previous actions.

“I need to attend a summit on the Angaran home world of Aya, don’t make a decision now, come with us to Aya, sleep on it, but if you want this, it’s yours” Sara gestured to the drive core.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick 'thank you' for the flurry of comments and kudos over the last couple of days, it really does make my day to know you folk are enjoying it, we're maybe halfway though now, hopefully I'll get the action/plot/romance/angst balance right to keep you all on your toes <3


	13. Coasts & Canonballs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff - lots and lots of fluff.

Suvi carried two steaming mugs into the small room off the cargo bay that Liam once occupied. It had been cleared and the science officer found Robyn arranging makeshift furniture. It was odd seeing familiar items littering the space, a hoodie she’d once curled up in, paper books, toiletries. Two workbenches had been set up, OSDs, datapads and tools arranged neatly on each. At the back, where the room narrowed to a point a mattress, bedding and now an empty box as a bedside table, the room was already beginning to smell like Robyn, smell like home.

“Hey” Suvi said simply, handing Robyn her tea.

Robyn took it gratefully, sitting on the mattress her back against the wall, she patted the space beside her. As Robyn felt the weight of Suvi settle beside her she tipped her head back, staring at the ceiling feeling the cold against the back of her head.

“Sara’s asked me to stay” Robyn ventured.  
“I know” Suvi replied, sipping her tea.

Robyn felt the droplets of condensation forming on the inside of her hand from the hot cup, “I didn’t want to make a decision until we’d talked” she felt out of her depth.  
“You helped build the Tempest Ro,” Robyn flinched at the word, how easy we slip into old habits, a nickname only Suvi ever used, “you belong here.”

Robyn spoke quietly, trying to keep her voice level, “I’m sorry about what happened earlier, I didn’t mean to put you in an uncomfortable position, I’m just… “  
“Angry and hurt?” Suvi finished for her.

“Yeah, that about covers it” she sighed, “I really need this, I need to feel useful and like I have a purpose.” Robyn took a deep breath, still staring at the ceiling, “I’m not going to try and come between whatever you and her have.” She couldn’t bring herself to say Peebee’s name, “it’s not my decision to make, you know where I’m at, but I want you to know that there was a time when we were just friends, that has value for me too, can we work to get back to that?”

Suvi swirled her tea, watching the reflections from the lights shimmer on the biscuit coloured surface. She desperately wanted to tell Robyn how much she still loved her, how all she wanted was to throw herself into those beautiful arms, to lay her head on her chest and listen to the rhythm of her pulse, how often that sound had filled her dreams. But these feelings were raw, emotive and clouded, Peebee hadn’t happened by accident, months of subtle gestures, loaded conversation, mutual attraction, debates late into the night about everything and nothing at all, it wasn’t simple, it wasn’t black and white.

“I’d like that” Suvi settled on, she hoped Robyn couldn’t see the turmoil behind her eyes.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn walked into the galley to find Cora and Kallo seated around the table eating breakfast.  
“Good Morning Lieutenant, did you sleep well” the Salarian enquired kindly.

Robyn supressed a yawn, rolling back her shoulders as she spoke, “surprisingly well thank you Kallo, I find the sound of the drive core really relaxing” she looked around the kitchen realising she didn’t really know what the protocol was, “am I OK to help myself or… “

Cora saved her, “unless it’s got someone’s name on it, eat it, speak to Vetra about being put on the chef’s rota, she can probably fill you in on all the other stuff you’ll need to know about day to day Tempest life.”

“Thanks” Robyn smiled, before busying herself finding a bowl for her cereal, “Kallo can you let me know when you have some time to” Robyn hesitated for only a fraction as Peebee walked in, “to, go through some of Gil’s notes, I’ve got a couple of queries I was hoping you could help me with.”

“Of course, Lieutenant, please come to the bridge when you’re ready.”

There wasn’t space to sit down so Robyn stood in the far corner, propped against the counter and the wall, watching the milk soak into her breakfast.

She looked up, “Peebee,” the Asari turned to her, she looked tired and wary, Robyn felt a chill of guilt, she couldn’t quite meet her eye, “I er,” she put her bowl down, and fought to stop herself reaching for her neck, “I’m sorry, what I said yesterday, I was way out of line, I was really angry, but that’s no excuse, nobody deserves to be spoken to like that, I’m sorry.”

Robyn shifted uncomfortably.

“Don’t sweat it Harris” she grinned but the smile didn’t reach her eyes.

“Look,” Robyn continued, “I’m not going to be a problem, for you and Suvi I mean, I died, well kindof, anyway, I just wanted to say it.”

She picked up her bowl and started to eat, grateful the contents were now so soft she could swallow without chewing, the words she’d just said still sharp in her throat.  
Peebee carefully finished what she was doing, she wasn’t immune to someone else’s pain, she couldn’t even comprehend how she’d behave if she was in Robyn’s position, probably better not to think about it.

She gave the Lieutenant a sideways look, meeting her gaze, a half smile and nodded before silently taking her leave of the galley.

Kallo was slowly toying with his spoon in the dregs of whatever it is Salarians ate. Cora was the first to speak, “that was a pretty big chunk of pride you just swallowed marine”  
Robyn clenched her jaw, staring at the milky residue, hoping the urge to burst into tears would pass quickly.

Kallo stood up and tidied his things, he paused next to Robyn, placing a hand on her shoulder and in a low voice said, “I know you didn’t do that for you or Peebee, she’s lucky to have you” he gently squeezed her shoulder.

“Come find me on the Bridge.”  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi, Vetra and Scott stood talking with Sara on the bridge of the Tempest, Kallo hummed to himself at the helm. As Robyn entered the group turned to face her.

“How is our newly minted engineer this morning?” Sara asked.

Robyn automatically stood to attention and saluted “very well thank you ma’am.”

The quartet stared at her, Robyn felt herself blush, “what?” she asked, she was smiling despite the deep crimson that she could feel burning at her cheeks.

Scott howled, “you just ma’amed my sister” he clapped his hands, “that was too good.”

Sara was trying desperately not to laugh, Suvi giggled behind a gloved hand and Vetra didn’t even attempt to hide her amusement.

“No need for salutes Harris” Sara said kindly although she couldn’t keep the laughter from her voice.

Robyn grinned and shrugged, “old habits die hard.”  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi slipped out of her seat to take a break, leaving Kallo and Robyn deep in conversation, their toing and froing, backwards and forward questioning about all aspects of the Tempest had been the soundtrack to the last few hours. The pair were getting on well, challenging each other respectfully, both engaged and absorbed in their debates and discussions. Seeing them both so animated made Suvi’s heart sing.

Quietly she entered Peebee’s room, finding her bent over her workbench tools in hand a look of intense concentration on her face. The Asari looked up, and gave her visitor a tired smile.

Peebee put down the tiny screwdriver she’d been using and opened her mouth to speak, the science officer closed the space between them placing a finger to Peebee’s lips before replacing it with a soft kiss.

“I’m sorry I didn’t come and find you yesterday, I was a bit of a mess” Suvi’s voice was quiet her soft accent velvet in the air.  
“I know” Peebee replied, “not every day the love of your life comes back from the dead” she quipped, trying to keep things light.  
“True” Suvi replied weakly.

“I can see the attraction, that shaggy black hair, softly spoken, rugged sexiness” Peebee put her arms around Suvi’s waist as she saw the blush rise in her girlfriend’s cheeks, “an intellect to challenge your own, and the ability to admit when she’s out of line.” Peebee’s voice was small, quiet “In the same position, I don’t think I’d apologies to me.”

“I like you” Suvi started.  
“But you love her” Peebee said, it wasn’t an accusation, just fact.  
“I don’t know, I can’t just pick up where we left of, she hasn’t been in my life for three years, none of this is simple.”  
“I’ll make it simple, you lead the way, until you tell me something different I’m here, with you.”  
“I feel like I’m just going to end up hurting both of you.”  
“Maybe, but we’re both big girls” Peebee leant down to kiss Suvi, “now go science or something” she shooed her away.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
As Suvi left Kallo and Robyn fell silent, both breathing a slight sigh of relief.

“Thanks for this Kallo, I really needed to get stuck into something, I’m excited to see what we can do with the Tempest together.”

“It is my pleasure Robyn, I still can’t believe I have Lucilles secret weapon in front of me.”

“Maybe in time I’ll thank Jien for all of this” Robyn pondered.

Kallo gave her a knowing smile, “the mere fact you even entertain that thought of hope means you will, Lieutenant.”

She nodded, suddenly lost for words, touched by his kindness, so sincere and so certain. She stood up and took her leave, excited to start work.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------  
“You two done debating for the day?” Suvi teased as she sat back down at her station.

“Oh Suvi, I’ve had such fun, it has been a long time since I’ve been able to stretch my mental wings as it were. I don’t wish to speak ill of Gil, we had our differences he was good at his job, but his solutions were always brash, clumsy.” He sighed wistfully, “Engineer Harris presents some quite novel ideas, incredibly sophisticated, yet simple, elegant, I can completely understand how you fell in love with such a deeply complex and beautiful mind.” Kallo stopped abruptly, he’d got caught up in his own enthusiasm, “I’m sorry Suvi I didn’t mean.” He let himself fall into an awkward silence.

Suvi chuckled, “it’s OK Kallo, you don’t have to tiptoe around me, I knew you two would get on” she gave him a reassuring smile.  
“You’re my best friend Suvi, I’m sorry about everything, I wish there was something I could do.”

“Oh Kallo, just be you, whatever happens will happen, we’ll all muddle through, but none of that should affect your relationship with Robyn.”  
Kallo turned back to his controls, humming cheerfully as he did so.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn cautiously approached the exit ramp of the Tempest, they’d landed on Aya, this would be her first footsteps on solid ground in Heleus, Jaal, Cora and Vetra stood waiting for her.

“You are apprehensive, are you not?” Jaal questioned.

Robyn swallowed, “I’ve had a lot of change in my life recently” the others grinned at her, understatement of the century, “I don’t do well with crowds and I’m a bit nervous, you know, the whole new species thing, first steps in Heleus.”

Jaal placed both his hands on her shoulders and fixed her with a confident look, “don’t worry, we will avoid the city, let me show you the true beauty Heleus has to offer.”  
The quartet left the ship and true to his word Jaal skirted around the edge of the city, Robyn got the impression he was a big deal given the number of people who greeted him. All the Angarans they met were polite and friendly. They soon picked up a path that snaked its way through the dense jungle foliage, dropping down through the inversion layer the fine mist of droplets tasted sweet on their tongues as they breathed.

The four chatted easily, telling stories and anecdotes, filling Robyn in on all their adventures in Andromeda so far, it reminded Robyn of college, or being back home, just hanging out with friends.

In turn, Robyn asked questions about Aya and Jaal went into great detail about the various plants and animals they saw as they continued on their downward path.

Finally, the path evened out and Robyn felt the air leave her body as she took in the spectacular view before her. They’d exited the jungle to find themselves the sole occupants of a tiny cove, the beach no more than 20 metres across, each side overshadowed by towering cliffs of deep red sandstone. The cliffs funnelled the eye to the distant ocean beyond and Robyn marvelled at the rolling waves, building as the narrowing channel constricted them. The cliffs forming an echo chamber that amplified the beautiful tone of the waves crashing on the sand.

The pull of the melodic motion drew the Lieutenant to the fine sand that marked the boundary between land and sea, she let the crescendo ebb and flow through her, she could feel her body calming, tingling with the overwhelming sensation. She lost herself in the swirls and stripes of the cliffs, drawing lines between the rounded pockets worn over centuries by the wind and water, now providing shelter to any number of small creatures.

Robyn could hardly breathe for the beauty of it all, it had been years since she’d been to a beach, having grown up with sand permanently between her toes this felt like a homecoming. She knelt down to unlace her boots, desperate to feel the grains on her skin, to feel grounded, the slightly damp surface felt wonderful and as the soft tickle of the waves lazily wrapped itself around her ankles she felt the rush of sand moving around her heel as it retreated with the tide.

She looked down to see a pair of purple feet next to her own, trousers rolled up to the knees. “This is incredible Jaal.”  
“I did a bit of research about your home, I discovered you come from a place famous for its coastline, I thought this might help you feel at ease.”  
Robyn lent into him as he put a giant arm around her shoulder, “thank you” she whispered.  
“I can feel the conflict inside you Robyn, I hope this can help you heal a little.”

The pair turned and walked back up the beach to find Cora and Vetra sat on a makeshift picnic blanket, a small spread of food laid out.  
“Aww you guys are the best” Robyn smiled.

Vetra explained what all the various foodstuffs were, Robyn tried to follow but she was overwhelmed by the surroundings and the kindness of her new crewmates.

Jaal and Vetra settled down with datapads to read in the afternoon sun but Cora fidgeted incessantly. “Let’s go explore” Robyn said. The pair headed off down the beach, clambering up and over the rocky outcrops, exploring the nooks and crannies of the weathered stone, laughing like schoolgirls when one of them slipped or sank up to their thigh in a particularly deep pool.

They found a flat outcrop to sit on, dangling their bare feet over the edge into space, watching the water churn below, spying Vetra and Jaal still lazing on the beach.

“You doing okay?” Cora asked.

Robyn shrugged, “no idea, one minute I’m fine the next I want to scream, this helps though, I really appreciate the effort you guys are making.” She turned to meet Cora’s gaze with a grateful smile.

“She’ll come to her senses.”  
“I’m trying not to think about it, as far as I’m concerned she’s with someone else and off limits, if that changes then, yeah, maybe we can rebuild, but right now I need to focus on my new job and getting my head straight.”

“Well you’re doing a good job so far, now I’m going to do something totally out of character and a little crazy.” With that, Cora stood up and started peeling off her clothes.

“You’re not?” Robyn said jumping up and grinning.  
“You bet I am, well if I can do it soon so I don’t bottle it.”

Robyn pulled off her top and shuffled out of her trousers the pair down to their underwear, clothes piled on the rock.

“You sure?” Robyn laughed.  
“Three, two, one.” Cora grabbed her nose and launched herself into the air, her free arm and legs waving in the air, she hit the water, spray flying into the air. She came to the surface and flicked her hair backwards, laughing. “Come on then Harris!”

Robyn noticed Vetra and Jaal had stood up and were watching. She took a step back then primed her biotics, she threw herself upwards feeling the warm air rush over her body, as she started to descend she let out a “Wooohoooooooo!” before pulling her knees to her chest and performing a perfect cannonball to cascade a tidal wave over Cora.

Oh, how wonderful it felt to be enveloped in the water, it was a comfortable temperature, a shock to the system but not the kind of chest tightening cold she was used to.   
She came to the surface a goofy grin plastered all over her face, the sheen of water on her skin making it look a shade darker.

“You’re gonna be a handful aren’t you” Cora laughed.  
“What? You started this.”  
“No, I just got there first” Cora winked.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi found Peebee in the museum fiddling with Remnant tech, she wrapped her arms around the Asari from behind, pulling her close.”

“Hey”

Peebee twisted in her arms, planting a swift kiss on her cheek, “Hey you.”

“Come get lunch with me, we need a date after the last couple of days, some time together, just us.”

Suvi pushed all thoughts of Lieutenant Harris from her mind; she’d accepted a long time ago that she’d always love her. She couldn’t drop everything, she wanted to at least try to make things work with Peebee, they both deserved that, it was the right thing to do, she whispered the words like a mantra, and maybe with enough practice she’d believe them.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
“Looks like Suvi’s made up her mind” Scott muttered, Lexi, Sara and Drack turned to see the couple, hand in hand walking towards the Tempest.   
Drack laughed, “heh, I wouldn’t bet on that kid.”

“Here comes trouble” Lexi muttered under her breath, they all turned to see Vetra, Jaal, Cora and Robyn tearing down a footpath, elbows flying, Vetra pushing Robyn sideways as she tried to come past. The foursome collapsed in a sweaty heap on the ramp of the Tempest breathing hard.

“Better luck next time” Vetra gasped.  
“You play dirty Nyx” Cora countered.

By now Peebee and Suvi had arrived to see the aftermath of the race back to the Tempest, Robyn was enjoying the feeling of the pounding of her heart, and the stab in her lungs, the uphill sprint had been crazy, her legs stiff with lactate, she could feel all the muscles in her torso flex and contract as she tried to steady her breathing.

“Why are you two wet?” Sara asked.  
Robyn opened her eyes, sitting up to look at the Pathfinder, “Jaal took us to the beach, had to go for a swim.”  
“Rude not to” Cora added.  
They grinned stupidly at each other, their hair still damp and dishevelled, t-shirts darkened where they’d thrown them onto wet bodies.

“You’ve never taken me to the beach” Sara said with mock hurt.  
“As far as I’m aware” Jaal paused to get his breath, “your homeland is a desolate flatland of vegetable fields.”  
“Fair point” Sara laughed.

Cora stood up and offered a hand to Robyn, “come on Harris, shower before Kallo goes nuts because you got grit in engineering.” As Robyn let Cora pull her upright she met Suvi’s eye over Harpers shoulder, the Lieutenant flashed her a smile, it was so natural, for a split second she’d forgotten everything and had simply shared a moment with the woman she loved. Shaking her head, she marched into the Tempest, trying to console the hurt in her chest “it’ll get easier, it has to get easier.”


	14. Take a Seat

Maybe it did get easier, or maybe Robyn got better at masking her discomfort, even from herself. As those first few tentative days in Heleus bled into weeks, her breathing got a little easier, she stopped flinching every time she saw Suvi or Peebee but still the ball of anger which threatened to spew out of her lingered.

For the most part, the Lieutenant just ignored it, supressed the frustration and whining unfairness of it all and threw herself into her work, she tweaked the Tempest making her sing, much to the delight of Kallo. Sara had agreed to postpone any talk of continuing her research until she was ready, they were the only two who knew about it anyway so what did it matter?

Robyn was awake before her alarm despite the early hour, she’d been working on an update for the Tempest’s scanners but needed access to both Kallo’s and Suvi’s terminals, she wanted to make the hardware alteration before their shift started at eight, she’d given herself three hours. She slid on a pair of faded grey jeans and her white Alliance engineering corp t-shirt, she only had a handful of clothes with her, although Vetra had promised to fine her some spare AI clothing when they returned to the Nexus.   
With her tool bag slung over her shoulder the Lieutenant made her way to the silent Bridge, the only light from the surrounding terminals.

“Morning SAM”  
“Good Morning Robyn” chimed SAM.  
“Can you divert the helm and science station functionality to the remote interfaces in the meeting room please and isolate power relay 387-B?” Robyn asked as she dumped her tools and started moving the seats out of the way.

“Complete” SAM affirmed.  
“Perfect, thanks SAM, fancy choosing some music?”  
“What are you in the mood for this morning Lieutenant?” SAM queried.  
Robyn thought for a moment, “anything which falls under acoustic pop punk, twenty first century onwards.”

Working methodically Robyn proceeded to strip out and replace various parts in the helm control terminal, her tools laid out neatly, she’d visualised the work in advance so the process felt automatic and she lost herself in the task, singing along to SAMs playlist.

The same task on the science station was more awkward, the access panel was underneath meaning she had to slide into the foot well on her back and work upside down.  
Suvi arrived on the Bridge at seven, she liked to run through any overnight reports from the Nexus with her morning tea before her shift started, she found this alone time set her up for the day.

She was surprised to find music playing as she entered, she smiled as she recognised the boots which were tapping out the rhythm of the song whilst their owner sang softly, the lyrics interrupted with the occasional profanity.

Suvi sat on the step watching Robyn work, she could see the muscles in her forearms quiver with the effort of working in a confined space upside down. The science officer nudged her toe into Robyn’s side.

Harris dropped her head to see Suvi sat watching her, mug in hand, a relaxed smile on her face.

“Oh man is it eight already?” Robyn couldn’t believe she’d been working for so long and cursed herself.  
“Don’t stress it’s only seven, I like to start early.”

Robyn raised an eyebrow, thinking about all those mornings where she’d practically had to shoehorn Suvi out of bed to get to her lab for nine. Suvi blushed, “don’t give me that look Ro, I decided to turn over a new leaf when I started here, even took up jogging” Robyn grinned at the look of pride on Suvi’s face.

“Well apologies for disrupting your morning routine Dr. Anwar, just giving you a little upgrade.”  
“What is it?” Suvi asked.  
“Ah, patience” Suvi pouted, “not gonna work Anwar, immune to your puppy dog eyes and quivering lip” Robyn joked.

The Lieutenant slid herself out from under the terminal and sat up, rubbing her forearms and feeling them bulge as the blood returned, Suvi reached out and took hold of her arm, studying the inside of Robyn’s wrist.

“Will the scars fade?” 

Robyn swallowed the lump in her throat, “in time, the freezer burn went pretty deep.” Robyn, as gently as possible pulled her arm from Suvi’s touch, her fingertips burning more than the frozen shackles ever did.

“Sorry, I didn’t think” Suvi stumbled.

When Robyn spoke, her tone was gentle and quiet, “don’t worry, it’s just” she tried to give Suvi a reassuring look, “well, I haven’t really started untangling myself from you, I’ve just kind of been ignoring the fact that you just have to look at me and I melt.” Robyn felt the heat rise in her cheeks, it felt like the first time she’d been honest with herself, let alone anyone else.

“You’re one to talk” Suvi chuckled, “you and your bloody smile, it was like meeting you for the first time at ISSAC all over again.”

Robyn ran her hand through her hair, “god that feels like a lifetime ago, weren’t you hungover?”

It was Suvi’s turn to blush, “gosh was I, oh my days I could still taste the malt, you know, I liked you from the moment I saw you?”

Robyn grabbed her wire cutters and dived back under the terminal she couldn’t bare to look at Suvi, she focused on carefully stripping the flex off two pieces of cable, before separating the fine cords of copper, plaiting them together in a beautiful splice.

Suvi let the silence grow between them, she knew she was walking a dangerous line, one she’d been scared to even contemplate. 

Finally, Robyn screwed the terminal panel back into place and sat up once more.

“Done, just a few calibrations and then it’s time for the grand reveal.”  
“When did you know?” Suvi asked.

Robyn’s voice was a choked whisper, “From the first night, I went to sleep and woke up every day thinking about how much I wanted to kiss you.” There was no embarrassment, just a raw honesty.

Suvi looked at her hands, scared that Robyn’s words had voiced her own thoughts and feelings, she knew if she looked into her eyes she’d see her own emotions reflected back.

Robyn collected her tools and stood up, carefully returning the science station to its previous state. Suvi stood and faced her, the air between them crackled with static that Robyn tried not to think about, she tried not to hold onto the details of the way Suvi’s hair fell in auburn textures, she tried not to focus on the gloss of Dr. Anwar’s lips, she tried not to think about the taste and pressure of that mouth on hers.

“And I still do.”

Robyn turned away, she felt the physical wrench like a moon trying to leave the gravitational pull of its planet. Robyn had spent nearly two years orbiting Suvi, their delicate dance a binary star system, now it felt anything but sedate and calm, Robyn felt like the rushing gas of a red giant collapsing inwards towards its neutron core. She knew at some point she’d strike it and she wasn’t sure what the impact would do to her.

Suvi took her seat, trying to jumpstart her brain, it had been an intense start to her day, one she hadn’t expected. Robyn instructed SAM to return the terminals to normal and took Kallo’s seat at the helm, her fingers dancing over the console as she did the final calibrations.

“Ah, Good Morning Lieutenant, Suvi” the Salarian greeted them, unaware of what had transpired between the pair.

“Hey Kallo” Robyn said as she stood up so he could take his seat, “do me a favour and take the Tempest towards that band of Scourge” Robyn pointed to their starboard flank, a soft tendril of the swirling dark cloud drifted lazily.

“You could pilot the ship” Kallo stated.

“Nope, not allowed, I have photon sensitivity” Kallo and Suvi looked at her quizzically, Robyn shrugged, “it means I sneeze when I see bright lights.”

Kallo blinked at her as though he didn’t quite understand, “what an utterly useless reflex.”

“Pretty much” Robyn laughed in agreement.

Suvi giggled too and caught Robyn’s eye, they were both grateful for the change in atmosphere.

As Kallo steered the Tempest carefully towards the Scourge Sara came onto the Bridge, Robyn managed to fight the urge to stand to attention in the presence of her commanding officer. 

“Why are we moving?” Sara asked.  
“Testing out the new sensor upgrade” Robyn explained as Sara arched a questioning eyebrow.  
“She won’t tell you” Suvi teased, “Harris is into grand reveals.”  
“No, it’s just easier to show than to explain” quipped Robyn.

As the ship settled into position, Robyn pulled up her Omni-tool making the final checks, “okay, Kallo, Suvi, scan the Scourge.”

“Er, Robyn, we can’t” Kallo replied, Harris grinned in reply.  
“Do it for me Kallo?”

He sighed, “sensors calibrating, scanning now, well I’ll be” the Salarian stared at the console in front of him, “but how?”

“Will someone please explain?” Sara said in exasperation. 

“Ryder” Suvi breathed, “we can see the Scourge, previously whenever we tried to scan it we just got jumbled readings, this means we can actually navigate through it in real time rather than having to plot a course based on algorithms and guess work.”

Kallo turned in his seat, “how did you do it?”

Robyn crossed her arms, “two things, firstly I experimented with filters, like when you polarise light, trying to figure a combination that would clear some of the noise from the scanners, secondly, skiing.”

Kallo looked at her blankly, “skiing?”

“Look it up on the extranet, when you ski through tree’s you’re taught to look at the gaps rather than the trees, if you focus on the trunks you’re more likely to hit them. The adjustment to the scanners works on the same principle, you aren’t really ‘seeing’ the Scourge, the scanners actually pick up the gaps in the Scourge and then invert the data so it’s in a form you recognise.”

“Impressive.” Robyn turned to look at the speaker, Peebee smiled at her.  
Robyn shrugged, “you know, science” she could feel herself shift uncomfortably.

Peebee laughed, “ah so we’ve discovered the one thing Lieutenant Harris can’t do” she paused, “take compliments.”  
Robyn blushed.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
“Take a seat” Lexi stated.

Robyn did as she was told, her weekly meetings with Dr T’Perro weren’t a chore but nor were they entirely enjoyable. Since Robyn and Suvi had reminisced about the start of their relationship the Lieutenant had had to deal with a smattering of unwanted feelings, it wasn’t that anything remarkable had happened in the intervening months but she could feel herself getting closer and closer to that inescapable collision.

“How has your week been?” Lexi started, she was becoming frustrated by these sessions, the Tempest’s new engineer gave nothing away, she’d tolerated it thus far but something had to give.

“Fine, good, thanks” Robyn offered.

Lexi sighed, “Okay Lieutenant, we can either continue this charade where you tell me you’re fine each week whilst being unable to look me in the eye or you start giving me something so I might actually be able to help you?” Although Lexi’s tone was gentle her words still stung.

Robyn pushed herself off the bed, turning away, her teeth clenched, the familiar flutter of the muscle on her jaw line as it pulsed with her simmering anger.

Balling her hands in fists she slammed her right hand into the wall, she didn’t feel a thing but the deformation of the fifth metacarpal told her all she needed to know, her system flooded with embarrassment and disgust at herself, she let her back hit the wall and slid down into a heap on the floor, then the tears came. Great heaving sobs which shook her whole body.

Lexi sat next to her and took her broken hand in hers. The cool blue fingers entwined with the Lieutenants, she drew patterns on the back of her hand, avoiding the tent which had formed as the two broken sections arched upwards.

After a time, Robyn steadied her breathing, she squeezed Lexi’s hand grateful for the physical contact, an anchor as she rode out her storm.

“I’ve never been angry before, I don’t know how to deal with it, I don’t know what to do and I just feel emotionally stunted, embarrassed. I’m not even sure what I’m angry at anymore, I hate feeling so out of control but equally I’m fed up of being in control” Robyn found the words came easier than she’d imagined, she felt the relief flood her as she finally had the courage to give voice to her turmoil.

She went on, “I begrudge that other people have made decisions about my life and now I have to live with them. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for the welcome I’ve had here, but then equally I don’t feel like I’m allowed to complain, I feel so childish, humiliated almost when I allow myself to think this is so unfair.”

Robyn had rested her free elbow on her knee, and let her hand meet her forehead, Lexi looked on as the young woman continued to unravel before her. “Why the fuck did she have to be here Lexi? Why couldn’t I have rocked up, got over the head fuck of Andromeda and then gone on my merry way to find her in my own time, why did we have to end up on the same ten inches of space ship!”

Robyn was becoming more hysterical, the adrenaline from her broken bone starting to wane, her body began to shake, “I can’t deal with how I feel about her as well as everything else, I can’t untangle myself from her, she’s intoxicating and maddening at the same time, she probably doesn’t even realise what she does to me, what I’d do to just fall into her arms and have this crazy world just stop for a moment, I’d give anything for just a second of calm.”

Robyn rested her head on the wall behind her and wiped her face on her sleeve, that hadn’t been pretty but she felt a heck of a lot better.

“Done?” Lexi asked kindly.

Robyn nodded.

Lexi stood up and pulled Harris to her feet, the Lieutenant went back to her usual position on one of the beds. Dr. T’Perro laid a tube of medigel on the bed and stood in front of Robyn.

“I’m not going to offer you pain relief because I know you’ll refuse, I know you need to beat yourself up about doing something so stupid as breaking your own hand, whether I agree with your mentality doesn’t really matter, this will hurt.”

Lexi took hold of Robyn’s broken hand, bones are held in place by the soft tissue of ligaments, tendons and muscles, they’d do most of the work for her. She grasped Robyn’s wrist in one hand and pulled the knuckle of the Lieutenants finger, with a satisfying snap the two parts clicked back into position.

Robyn inhaled sharply, her nervous system flared and her head went blank with white noise, she tried desperately to exhale and release her pain, she voiced it the only way she knew how, “fuck!”

“Indeed” Lexi smiled.

The medi gel would have it healed in a matter of hours, the mental scars would take longer.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Cora handed Robyn a beer, before making herself comfortable on the mattress beside her. 

“What’s this?” Robyn asked.

“Lexi mentioned she’d put you through the mill a bit earlier, I though maybe you could do with a drink.” Robyn smiled, the cold weight of the bottle in her hand felt comforting, she could feel herself salivate at the anticipation of the crisp taste and fizz of bubbles on her tongue.

That first taste didn’t disappoint, she took a long pull and felt some of the tension she’d been holding ebb away.

“Talk shit with me Harper” Robyn said, since the trip to Aya Cora and Robyn had often found themselves sharing a drink talking about nothing in particular, their friendship was easy, relaxed, maybe it was their shared history in the Alliance but they just clicked into a comfortable team.

In no time at all the pair of them were laughing, neither could really remember what about but that was irrelevant. 

“Next time we’re at Kadara port I’m taking you to the darkest, dingiest bar there and we are going to get pissed on homebrew and ryncol so you can work out some of your tension” Cora announced.

“I’m there” Robyn laughed, “can you make sure there’s some hot leather clad mistresses for eye candy, you know just to finish it off.”

“Only if there’s some shirtless hunk for me to swoon over too” Cora blushed.

“Ah just hook up with Scott, he’d be more than willing” Robyn winked.

“No!” exclaimed Cora, “I’ve been avoiding that one, I don’t want a puppy I want a fuck.”

“Yeah, I get the impression you’d have to err, lead the way as it were.”

Cora rolled her eyes, “I think the only women Scott has seen naked are in fornax, he probably wouldn’t know where to put it” the pair fell about laughing, Robyn could feel the booze in her veins, stirring a hint of arousal.

“Can you order a fight too?” Robyn asked, “you know to complete the Navy cycle. Kill. Drink. Fuck.”

“KDF” Cora laughed, “I haven’t thought about that in a long-time marine, when was the last time you put those biotics to use?”  
“It’s been a while”  
“Still sharp?”  
“Always.”  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Lexi slipped into bed beside Sara, letting her leg drape languidly over the other woman, she rested her head in the crook of Ryder’s shoulder.

“Had a breakthrough with Harris today.”

“Goods, it’s about time, I’ve been on edge waiting for that bottle to blow” Sara replied, letting her fingers stoke across the valley of Lexi’s back.

“It was quite spectacular, hopefully we can start to make progress now, although you need to give her the opportunity to blow off some steam.”

“How so?”

“Come on Sara, she’s angry, confused, lost and in love, she’s been walking that knife edge of control and chaos since she woke up, take her on a mission, let her get her rocks off over guns and explosives, she may be an engineer but she’s a highly trained solider too.”

Sara rolled into Lexi, “mmm speaking of getting rocks off.”

Lexi gave her ‘the look’ “Okay, okay, I’ll see what I can do.”

“Good” Lexi stated, she let her hand weave it’s way into Sara’s hair pulling her into her, “now what were you saying?”


	15. Trust Exercise

“Suggestions? Anyone?” Sara Ryder had gathered her squad in the meeting room of the Tempest, they had spent the last two hours, painstakingly reviewing every detail of the schematics which were projected in front of them. The Kett base on the far side of Kadara appeared to be impenetrable. 

Set in a 200-metre-deep crater the base had once been a munitions production facility, since the defeat of the Archon Kett forces had dug themselves into small bases such as this, Initiative and Angaran forces were systematically clearing each one but this remained a tricky proposition.

The sides of the crater were too steep for a ground assault, snipers could easily pick off an approaching force as soon as they crested the upper ridge. Equally an aerial attack was out of the question, the facility had long range AA turrets which would easily swot an incoming ship or missile out of the sky. 

“How many squad members would you usually take to deal with something like this?” Robyn asked, she spoke as she typed figures into her Omni-tool, calculating possibilities.  
“We always operate as a team of three, why?” Sara asked.  
“There is a way in but you’d be limited to, I believe, myself, Peebee and Cora.”

The rest of the squad looked at her, she met Cora’s gaze, her eyes grew wide.  
“You can’t be serious Harris?” 

Robyn nodded slowly, a grin spreading on her face, “it’s right on the cusp, be a little dizzy up top but just hold your breath, after the first 3 seconds the atmosphere stabilises.”

“Explain” Sara stated.

Cora spoke up, “I think the Lieutenant is suggesting we do a biotic HALO.”

“High Altitude, Low Opening jump” Harris explained, “it was developed by paratroopers who needed to avoid enemy radar, you jump from well above AA tower range, individual bodies are too small to pick up on scanners, then when you are under the sight line you break your fall. With parachutes, you could only do this over water, you literally opened the chute 10m above the surface and hoped you didn’t snap your neck or break your legs with the impact.” An uncomfortable ripple ran around the table, “with biotics though you can catch yourself millimetres from the ground and there’s even less likelihood of being spotted.”

“You’re crazy” Vetra stated.  
“Sounds fun” Scott said lightly.

Sara studied Robyn, she already knew this woman’s attention to detail was impeccable and doing the impossible seemed like an every day occurrence. “Harris, are you serious about this?”

Robyn met her questioning look, “Absolutely Pathfinder,” she’d added the title for effect, “joking aside, you need to have complete and utter confidence in your ability but once you’ve mastered deployment from a low height the principle is the same.”

“Can you teach me and Peebee?”

“Sure.”  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
Sara and Peebee stood in the cargo bay, both feeling a little nervous.

“You sure about this Ryder? Can we not just leave the Kett be?”

“It might be fun” Sara grinned.

“Remind me Ryder, how many times have you smashed your face in since coming to Andromeda?” Peebee retorted.

Before Sara could answer Robyn walked in, a med kit under her arm, she saw the look of apprehension on her students faces, “just in case” she said, before giving them a reassuring smile.

“So, the only important bit of the HALO is the last 3 seconds, the height we’re jumping at will mean we hit terminal velocity, I’ll set up your Omni-tools to tell you when you are hitting the three second barrier, then you start counting. If you deploy too early you’ll brace too far up and won’t have enough time to cooldown and re-brake. We can get around that by either myself or Cora leading then if it looks like you’re in trouble we can catch you.”

Robyn could see the tension in Sara and Peebee, “don’t stress, seriously, just count one, two and on the ‘th’ of the three, that’s when you deploy.”

The Lieutenant walked away from her subjects and took the elevator to the upper walkway, “I’m going to demonstrate the position you want to aim for and how you deploy.” With that she swung her legs over the safety rail. She’d have to jump slightly forward to combat the rotation of such a short jump. Making a fist with her right hand she wrapped her left on top and braced them against her naval. 

Sara and Peebee stared as they watched the Lieutenant jump, they felt the wave of displaced air as she came to rest about three feet off the ground, her body tense and braced against the back force of the ball of biotics she’d created. After a fraction of a second Robyn curled herself round and planted her feet on the ground.

Peebee and Sara looked at her as if she were crazy.

“That was… novel.” Peebee chirped.

“To start, just stand on the supply crate, hold the brace position, and let yourself fall forward, deploy your biotics at whatever point you like, but aim to gradually wait longer and longer, if it looks like you’re going to hit the deck I’ll catch you.”

For the next half hour Peebee and Sara took turns in their own private trust exercise, each gradually getting lower and lower, their confidence growing with each attempt. Robyn watched carefully, gently correcting technique and giving words of encouragement.

“Okay, let’s move on to the upper deck, it’s easier if you each do this in private, some people find it a little intimidating.”  
“I need to grab something to eat, call me when you’re done” Sara said, relieved to get a break.

Peebee and Robyn stood on the edge of the raised elevator looking down on the cargo hold below. To Peebee it looked a lot higher than she’d anticipated, gravity wells were one thing, but falling face first and trying to save herself, she was nervous. 

Robyn placed a hand on her shoulder, “you okay?”

Peebee bit her lip, “I’d like to pretend that I was all confident and I trust myself, but I don’t.”

“Want to do the first one tandem, so you can get used to the extra height without having to do the catch?”  
Peebee nodded.

Robyn directed Peebee to stand on the edge of the elevator with her feet together, the Lieutenant then stood behind her, legs slightly spread, she guided Peebee’s arms to form a reverse hug behind Robyn’s back grabbing each wrist, this locked their upper bodies together, Robyn then wrapped her arms around Peebee, hands clasped in front, ready to brace.

“Okay, so now you want to hook each foot around the back of my ankle, you’ll instantly feel off balance, like you’re going to fall forward, just keep the tension in your arms and trust me.”

Peebee nodded, she’d barely said a word throughout the whole process.

“On three we’re going to jump” Robyn could feel the Asari’s short sharp inhalations, a slight sheen of sweat had started to form on her brow.

Robyn counted down and gently launched them into the air, Peebee instantly wanted to scream but bit her tongue, the Lieutenant caught them less than a foot from the ground, she felt Peebee exhale.

Carefully Robyn dropped her hands and knees to the floor, supporting both their weight to allow Peebee to untangle herself.

“Your turn now, I’ll stay down here ready to catch if needed” Robyn watched as Peebee tentatively took the elevator back up and steadied herself by the edge.  
“I’m not going to let you hurt yourself.”

Peebee nodded and let herself fall, the nerves got the better of her though and she deployed too early, she was still 6 ft off the ground.

“Hold it!” Robyn yelled. She dashed forward and raised her arms, grabbing hold of Peebee’s waist, “okay let go.” Robyn braced as she took all of Peebee’s weight and guided her feet back to solid ground.

“Thanks” Peebee whispered.

“No problem, want another go” Robyn said glancing upwards.

“I can’t, I just don’t trust myself, I trust you but not me, how crazy is that, you know, given you have good reason to let me fall on my face” she giggled nervously.

Robyn shifted uncomfortably, “I don’t have anything against you Peebee, I actually quite like you” she offered a half smile.  
“Ditto”   
“Will you send Sara in when she’s ready?”  
“Sure thing.”

Robyn sat on the cargo crate and took off her gloves, she’d taken to wearing them after she broke her hand, although the bone had healed the bruising was still vivid, her stomach twisted in discomfort as she looked at it, feeling the shame well up.

“Hey” Peebee called, “Sara will be in shortly” Robyn didn’t notice the Asari continue to walk towards her, “I brought you a snack, Drack made cake and it’s the best” Peebee placed the plate on the crate next to Robyn, “woah what did you do to your hand?”

Robyn tensed, she could feel the embarrassment colour her cheeks, Peebee sat down next to her, for some reason Robyn let her take her bruised hand in hers. Peebee inspected the shapes of the marks, the colours deep and violent.

“I had a bad day” was all Robyn could offer.

“I’ll say”

“Can you keep this to yourself? I’ve made enough of a fool of myself as it is.”

“Hey” Peebee gently squeezed her hand, “you don’t need to be embarrassed, so you got angry and lost it, it happens, but don’t worry I won’t tell Suvi” she gave Harris a knowing look.

“She’s got, well you’ve both got enough to deal with without me adding any more stress, I really am sorry you’ve got caught up in this Peebee.”

“You’re the one going through hell and back Robyn, I can’t even begin to imagine, yet here you are, still thinking about other people before yourself.” Peebee tried to offer a smile but Robyn’s gaze was fixed to a spot on the floor.

The Lieutenant whispered, “I can’t think about me, I can’t bare to even acknowledged how I feel.”

For the first time Peebee really saw it, she saw what it looked like for another being to be so utterly ravaged by hurt and loss and longing, she saw in explicit detail the broken-hearted Robyn Harris. She continued to hold the woman’s hand, she didn’t have any words to offer.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn stood up and stretched, she’d been hunched over her makeshift desk for the past hour, the plans had been laid out and the Tempest would dock at Kadara port the following morning, after a resupply her, Sara and Cora would make the jump to take the base the following day. The Lieutenant scooped up her towel and headed for the shower.

Peebee had wandered down to the cargo bay to drop a beer off for Robyn, it was a small gesture but she wanted to try and make an effort. She found the room empty but couldn’t help the pull of curiosity at what was on the Lieutenants work station.

A small bottle of ink and an antique fountain pen lay next to several thick sheets of paper, pulling up her Omni-tool she translated the delicate script:

Hey Dad,

I’m sorry I haven’t written for a while, I know how much we both enjoyed writing to one another, somehow so much more personal than an email or call. You said pen and ink was superior because you had to be so much more considered with your words, I understand now that you were teaching me an approach I should demonstrate in all parts of life.  
It turns out I didn’t die, although I know that will be of small comfort to you and Mum now. I’m sorry you had to go through the memorial service, I’m sorry you’ll never understand what happened.

There are things I thought I still had plenty of time to say, I was wrong. Soon I’ll be asked to suit up and fight once more, you know I didn’t join the Alliance to become a career solider, but I love my work, I love the tactics and the teamwork, I love making a difference.

Andromeda is beautiful, it’s raw and wild, it fills me with the same feeling as surfing during the winter storms, it makes you feel fragile but oh so alive.

Suvi is here too, you can’t imagine how thankful I am that you got to meet her, I know I tried my best to convey everything about her and how I felt in our letters but I know my words never did her justice. I wish it had been under better circumstances, I wish you could have seen her as I did full of joy and wonder, she sees the potential in everything always glass half full.

You know before I came here, we’d started to talk about our future, working out how we could make it work when I had to return to active duty, I only had fourteen months to go and then I could have left the military.

My journey here was complicated, I ended up having to leave her for too long, she’s with someone else now, I hope you were right when you said time heals all.

Neither of us wronged the other, it was just a case of wrong time wrong place, maybe in another lifetime things would be different. It hurts more than I could imagine, all I ever wanted was to make her happy, that’s still the case, but stepping aside each day to let the woman I knew as my soulmate find her happiness with someone else, well, there are times I wish I had died in the lab.

I couldn’t write before, I was too angry, thankfully that seems to have passed, although now I’m left full of sadness, grief and loss. 

I miss you Dad, I miss our walks on the beach when the air was cold and the spray would bite at our faces, I miss Mum wrapping her arms around me threatening to never let go, I miss the simpler times when it was just us and equations written in the sand. I miss her.

R x

Peebee bit her tongue against the tears which stung the corner of her eyes. She jumped when Robyn walked in, towelling her hair.

There eyes met, Peebee wasn’t sure what had flashed across Robyn’s face, anger, hurt, resignation.

“I didn’t mean” Peebee faltered.

Robyn simply raised her hand, she took the bottle of beer Peebee was still holding and flipped the cap off on the workbench, “just leave” she turned her back on Peebee taking a long pull of beer.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Cora, Robyn, Vetra and Sara had crammed around the small table in the galley playing cards, the rest of the crew were enjoying Kadara port, but the three squad members never drank before a mission and Vetra knew too many people she didn’t want to run into.

They’d all been relaxed, laughing and joking, keeping things light before they tried to get some sleep. Robyn knew the anticipation would keep her awake but was experienced enough to know that one poor night’s sleep wasn’t enough to impact her focus.

Peebee, Scott, Drack and Suvi clattered into the confined space, their voices shrill with alcohol, they all smelt of stale smoke and liquor. Robyn let the conversation wash over her as the jokes and banter were battered back and forth, Suvi had leant against the wall next to Robyn, she was engrossed in the conversation, her words slightly slurred, the purr of her accent hard for Robyn to ignore.

Then she felt it, the delicate warm fingertips of Dr. Anwar on the soft skin below her earlobe, absent minded actions drawing lines up and down Robyn’s neck, straying into her hair. Robyn closed her eyes and swallowed hard against the instant swell of arousal that consumed her, she tensed and when she opened her eyes she saw Cora staring at her across the table. Robyn gripped the edge of the table trying to stay in control, feeling the primal tug, threatening to unravel her.

All at once Sara nudged Robyn hard in the side sending her sideways off of the bench, Cora leapt up and grabbed her arm, pulling Robyn towards the door, Peebee had done the same to Suvi, she’d seen the subconscious action too, she’d seen the instant reaction it had had, she’d seen how totally oblivious Suvi had been to her own or Robyn’s wanting.  
Cora slammed Robyn against the wall of her room slapping her hard across the face, “get a fucking grip marine” she was millimetres from Robyn’s face, the Lieutenant muttered something incomprehensible, “what was that Harris?”

Robyn looked her dead in the eye and saw the same frustration and pent up aggression reflected back, “harder” she snarled.

Cora threw her weight behind a punch to Robyn’s abs, rock hard, tense. 

Robyn coughed, “fuck that’s good” Cora grabbed a handful of her hair, pulling her back upright, just enough tension that it was starting to be painful.

“You need to hold it together Harris, tomorrow you’ll get your chance to blow some scumbag kett to pieces, then we’ll come back here and drink until we pass out, if you’re really lucky I’ll throw a few punches, but you need to keep things in order just a little longer.”

“Yes Ma’am” Robyn whispered.

“Good” Cora let go of her hair and walked towards the door.

“Thank you” Robyn said as she was about to leave. 

Cora looked over her shoulder and smiled, “I need it as much as you do Lieutenant.”


	16. Closer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note this chapter contains smut for character and plot development - magic space cock ahoy.
> 
> I don't consider it Explicit, although I may come back and write an explicit drabble but right now I'm all about the narrative.

Robyn awoke, she’d slept better than she’d anticipated, lying on her back she focused on the pressure of her body falling into the mattress and the weight of the duvet. She took several deep breathes feeling her cells tingle with the saturation of oxygen, mentally moving around the energy which flowed through her, she felt energised and alive.

Every solider had their own way of preparing before a mission, the commonality was in routine. Robyn knew better to consider it just routine, this was a ritual. Her clothing was already waiting, her loadout selected, she’d set her alarm so she had specific amounts of time to tick off her list of preparations, stretch, eat, wash, gear up and final brief, all carefully choreographed to minimise downtime, downtime gave marines opportunities to think, and thinking led so easily to doubt.

As Robyn carried out her meticulous readying she came to the task marked ‘KDF preparations’ on her to do list. Pulling out one of her supply crates she dug around, unearthing a bottle of vodka, she set it on her bedside table alongside a glass and a battered paper copy of erotica. Her plan was simply, complete the mission, get wasted, jerk off.

Lubing up the soft strapon she held in her hand the Lieutenant crossed her fingers that 600 years in storage hadn’t destroyed her cock, as she slipped the anchor point inside her she felt it start to sync with her nervous system, taking on the same shade of her skin. A tentative stroke confirmed all was in order.

Arranging herself accordingly Robyn pulled on her armour, taking her time over lacing her boots. The long sleeved armoured top was stiff from lack of use but as the material warmed up it became supple and almost fluid, the hardened weave contouring over her body, she took care pulling her gloves on to make sure there were no folds of fabric between fingers or across the palm. Next, she holstered her weapons, a handful of frag grenades, a strobe flare and her pistol, followed by a shotgun, reassuringly heavy she strapped to her back.

Picking up her helmet she tucked it under her arm and made her way to the bridge, she was ready to fly.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------  
Cora was already there, fiddling with something round her neck, Suvi and Kallo manned their stations whilst Scott and Peebee loitered, occasionally checking the readouts from the charts.

“Harris come do these up for me?” Cora asked,

Robyn threw her helmet to Peebee who caught it without flinching, making her way to Cora she saw the Alliance dog tags she was struggling to put on.

“All these years and you still wear them?”  
“I can’t not going on a mission, too many years of conditioning.” Cora laughed at her own superstition.  
“I’ve never understood the whole dogtag thing” Peebee chirped. 

Cora fingered the now attached tags around her neck, “a marine only ever goes into battle without their tags when they have surrendered to death” she explained.  
“I bet the Lieutenant still polishes hers” Peebee winked at Robyn.

Suvi quietly stood up and walked towards the group, without a word she carefully fished out a silver chain from beneath her jacket and undid the clasp. Robyn held her breath as Suvi’s hands reached around her neck and secured the chain, the only noise the soft scrap of the two squares of metal upon one another as they came to rest on her chest.

They didn’t make eye contact, as Suvi turned and headed back to her seat Robyn grabbed her helmet off a staring Peebee and left the bridge towards the cargo bay, her other hand stuffing the tags beneath her armour.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Sara gathered her squad for a final briefing, “pre-flight checks Lieutenant?”

“Don’t stress, squeeze your butt when you jump out, hold the position we practiced and just relax, me and Cora will jump ahead and clear the LZ, if it looks like it’s going pear shaped SAM will deploy with perfect timing, you have an advantage.” Robyn gave the Pathfinder a reassuring smile.  
“Hold on as the tailgate drops, the draught could pull you out” Cora cautioned.  
“Okay, see you both on the ground” Sara said as she secured her helmet.

Robyn and Cora did the same, they then took up positions either side of the exit ramp, holding on to the supports. Robyn saw a message pop up on her Omni-tool she quickly glanced at it and couldn’t help but smile.

Come back safe. X

“In position Pathfinder team, lowering the exit ramp” Kallo’s voice crisp in their ear pieces.

The cold air whipped into the cargo hold as the change in pressure tugged at their limbs, the noise like thunder from the rushing draught and engines burning.

“Good hunting Harper” Robyn shouted.  
“Fly safe Lieutenant” her reply.

With that they both released their grip and ran down the exit ramp throwing themselves into the void.

The first moments of a jump are filled with chaos, Robyn thrust out her limbs against the invisible currents which twisted and turned, rolled over one another and pummelled her body. She swallowed the momentary flash of panic, the tiny niggle of ‘oh shit’ and let her eyes adjust to the buffeting landscape.

The air was around zero degrees, frost was forming on the peripheral of her visor but it was nothing to trouble her, as she fell away from the ship the air stacks stabilised, from this height it was useless to spot the LZ, besides, a thin layer of cloud lay before them.

Robyn checked to her right and saw Cora a little above her looking relaxed. “Dive through the cloud Harper, let’s get to TV.”

In sync the two women locked their arms and legs together and tilted their heads down, the subtle movements enough to send them into a dive. Hitting terminal velocity is a surreal experience, the world still appears to rush towards you but it’s almost as if you stop rushing towards the world, you simply wait for your feet to meet the ground.  
Passing through the cloud was thankfully quick but the water droplets which clung to their armour chilled them further.

They could now spot the crater and the base, although still too far up for fine details.

“Sara, you okay?” Cora asked over the comms.  
“Harris, I hate you.” 

Despite being separated by a lot of open space Cora could almost feel the grin that would be plastered on the Lieutenants face.

“Watch the up-draught from the rim” Robyn called, “LZ coming into range.”

The air had started to get warmer, Robyn could feel it getting thicker against her, she focused on spotting her landing, constantly scanning for enemies, they’d deliberately chosen to land at the back of the facility in the hope they’d have enough cover to avoid detection.

Heart rate spiking, the thrill of the landing kicked in as Robyn’s omni-tool chimed, she counted to the ‘th’ of three and braced hard, there was a moment when she thought she’d mistimed it, the ground didn’t feel like it’d ever stop rushing towards her but a moment later she was stationary above a blue pillow and a cloud of displaced dust.

Quickly she righted herself and drew her pistol, crouching behind a low wall, she heard the unmistakable ‘thunk’ of Cora landing safely.

The pair took up their positions and scanned, the area, a lone sniper was stationed in a nest on top of the low domed roof, Robyn nodded to Cora and watched as the woman deftly made her way on to the roof to silently take him out.

A moment later a wave of grit washed over the Lieutenant as Ryder came to rest mere inches from the ground, she groaned and rolled sideways, Robyn kept low, grabbing a handful of the Pathfinder and dragging her into cover.

Sara pulled off her helmet, retching as she expelled her stomach contents into the dirt. “Not funny Harris” she said as she wiped her mouth on her sleeve and crouched next to the Lieutenant.

Robyn took off her own helmet and shook out her hair, stashing their kit for pickup later, “yeah the first time can be rough, at least you got your helmet off in time” she grinned.

“Again, none of the funny.” Sara scowled. 

Cora returned to their position “all clear, single guard on the front door, looks like the only way in.”

“Well let’s go knock” Sara stated.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
The squad worked methodically, Sara at point Cora and Harris taking the flanks, the Kett hadn’t expected an attack and the upper floor was easily cleared as they moved systematically from room to room.

“Scans show these stairs lead to the lower deck, it looks like one large room, you two go have fun I’m going to get SAM to hack into the AA towers.” Sara stated.  
“Can you take out the lights while you’re at it?” Robyn asked.  
“I’ll see what I can do.”

Cora and Robyn crept silently down the stairway, it narrowed as they went deeper, the dim light casting jumping shadows over the bare walls. An open doorway stood at the bottom, voices and footfalls could be heard, each woman pressed themselves against the wall, as if to merge into it.

Cora signalled for them to split up and edge around the side of the room, they waited.

Suddenly the lights went out, they could here the confused silence fall in the room beyond, Robyn removed the pin from a grenade, held it for two and then threw it into the room, it wasn’t meant to take out an enemy, more to confuse, the explosion ripped through the air, giving the pair cover to enter, Robyn drew her shotgun, silently moving through the shadows. Something had caught fire in the explosion, the flickering light catching the chaotic movements of the enemy, confused and panicked.

Robyn inhaled their fear, this is what being a marine was, the Alliance didn’t just teach you to pair your socks or shoot at a target, they conditioned you mentally and physically, the hours of controlled stress embedded subconscious triggers. The rush of adrenaline and stress hormones sharpened the senses, compression armour stimulated cells so it felt like your whole body moved with fluidity, instantaneous reflexes which hotwired a path from stimulus to action without even passing through the brain.

In a firefight, a marine is always calm, the mind is clear despite processing hundreds of variables in an ever-changing scene. Robyn felt her pulse rise, the tingle of her biotics, the rush of combat, her muscles revelling in the kickback from the shotgun, keeping a careful eye on the flare of Cora’s pistol, the only way to know where her team mate was located.

They moved through the space as if in sync, taking each target down before they even knew they were under attack, priming and detonating biotic blasts, the air thick with acrid smoke, bone fragments and shot discharge. 

They found their flow, taking cover, predicting the movement of their foes, sweat starting to form a slick barrier between skin and armour, the fire petering out, replaced by the mesmerising orange rotation of the ceiling mounted emergency lights.

“Harris!” Cora yelled, Robyn didn’t even look to see if the shot she’d taken had hit, she knew by the flecks of Kett brain it had. Cora was on the ground a Kett trooper stood above her, before he’d even had the chance to aim its rifle Robyn charged into its side, her omni-blade driving through its neck, a final throw knocked the last enemy hard into a bulkhead, proving fatal.

Robyn was breathing hard, her body alive with fire, combat did that, it was meant to, the Alliance trained you to thrive on the rush, the power, the control. The Navy demanded a marine walk the knife edge of chaos and control, demanded the pressures of confrontation aroused in every sense of the word, it’s how you survived.

Cora looked up, the orange strobe casting an eerie glow over the space, the deep blue waves pulsing off Robyn a stark contrast, she could almost feel Robyn shake with the adrenaline of the fight, looking at the Lieutenant she realised she was the physical manifestation of everything she herself were feeling, right down to the bulge in Harris’ pants.

Robyn offered Cora a hand, pulling her up, “interesting loadout Lieutenant” Robyn was caught momentarily off guard.  
“I like to prepare for all eventualities” her retort.

A door on the other side of the room opened, Robyn grabbed Cora and pulled them both into a hidden alcove, Cora’s back pressed against Robyn’s front.

Harper raised her pistol, Harris whispered in her ear “wait, let it come closer, we only get one shot.”

The Kett moved painstakingly through the room, circling consoles, disorientated by the emergency lights and the smoke which hung in the air. Robyn was acutely aware of her hardon pressing into Cora, Harper seemed to press back further, then her hand reached between them.

“Walking a dangerous line” Robyn’s gravelled whisper hot on Cora’s neck as she felt Cora’s hand run over her increasingly hard length.  
“Maybe I get off on the danger” Cora felt the Lieutenant twitch at her words. Robyn carefully removed a glove, neither of them took their eyes off the Kett as the Lieutenant infiltrated Harper's gear, Cora biting her lip and arching backwards as she found her mark.

Still the Kett’s reverberating methodical footsteps rang through the space, moving ever nearer their position.

Robyn fought to keep her breath silent as Cora’s hand continued to tease her, she couldn’t help but grind back against Harper. The Lieutenant sensed Cora closing in on her climax. The Kett was almost upon them, Robyn lazily took the shaking pistol from Cora’s hand, whilst not missing a beat she fired a single shot at a canister of explosives which blew the Kett clean off its feet, the head clattering off a pillar, limp and lifeless. 

The explosion covered Cora’s stifled cry as she came hard, pulling away she braced herself against the wall, steadying herself. The Lieutenant started frantically fumbling with her belt, she was so close, too close to walk away, she leant her weight against the wall trying desperately to fight through the layers.

Cora batted Robyn’s hands away, with a dexterous touch she released the Lieutenant, her warm touch needing only to provide a few expert strokes to push Harris over the edge.

Cora turned away, “Ryder, status?”  
“Finally, did you have me on mute Harper? AA guns are down, Kallo is bringing the Tempest down to the LZ.”  
“We’ll meet you there.”

Robyn straightened her armour and pulled on her glove, the pair carefully stepping over the bodies as they made their way silently back to the surface.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn peeled off her armour and started the process of disinfecting and cleaning, inside and out, more routine, more ritual, aimed at keeping her focused whilst she came back down from the high of the mission. 

Marines are at their most vulnerable after an assault, the pressure of walking so close to the wire meant something had to give, fights would often break out over nothing, usually alcohol fuelled, taking some quiet time to square your kit away was supposed to stop it from happening.

The Lieutenant sat on a pile of boxes in her boxers and t-shirt, she unscrewed the cap and took a swig of 600-year-old vodka, her face contorted at the horrendous taste, clearly it hadn’t got better with age. She tipped her head back against the wall, closed her eyes and let her hand drift south.

It wasn’t a surprise to either of them when Cora walked in, fresh out the shower in shorts and a vest. Harris didn’t bother to move her hand until Cora replaced it with her own.

Neither of them spoke, they just let it happen, violent, rough and frantic, fingernails deep in shoulders, teeth, need and release. This wasn’t about romance or attachment or even attraction, this was a primal yearning to fall safely into the chaos, neither attempting to quell their pleasure, feeding off one another, hungry and raw.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn washed away the day in the shower, she’d left Harper wrapped up in her duvet, a glass of water and full set of clothes waiting for her when she woke up. She knew when she returned to her room there would be no trace of what had happened, they’d never acknowledge what had taken place and it wouldn’t impact their future relationship. It was one of those moments, a stand-alone fragment of platonic interaction that they both needed and willingly gave each other.

Harris dressed and made her way to the Med bay, knocking before entering. 

Lexi looked up from her desk in surprise, Sara lay casually sprawled on one of the beds flicking lazily through a datapad.

“Everything OK Lieutenant?” Lexi enquired.  
Robyn shifted slightly but was sure Lexi would have seen worse, “I’ve got a couple of grazes, you know the kind that weep and you spend half your life picking fluff out of, I wondered if I could get some dressing for them?”

Lexi sighed, “get them out Harris.”

Robyn made a point of sitting on the opposite side of the bed so she faced Sara. She pulled her hoodie and t-shirt up over her head exposing her back to Lexi.

If Lexi was shocked by the network of scratch and bite marks which littered the Lieutenants back she kept it to herself, silently inspecting each one, only dressing those that needed it.

When Dr T’Perro had finished, Robyn redressed, though she didn’t make a move to leave.

“Sara?” the Pathfinder looked up, “can we build it?”

Ryder sat up, “you want to build it?” She repeated, Sara had come to the conclusion Robyn wanted to put the whole relay thing behind her.

Robyn shrugged, “I’ve been thinking, I’m here, with the knowledge, and you know, why not?” she paused, “I know there is the chance it won’t come to anything and if we can’t justify the resources, or the politics, then that’s cool, but well I seem to spend my life chasing impossible odds.”

Sara looked at the woman in front of her, as if seeing her for the first time, there was a fire burning the smouldering embers she’d only seen previously.  
“Okay, bring me a proper package of works, with all the details and we’ll review it.”

Robyn smiled, hopping off the bed and leaving, “Thanks Sara, Lexi.”

Sara looked at Lexi, “I’m guessing the Kett didn’t rip her back to pieces?”  
“Doctor patient confidentiality” Lexi replied, folding her arms.  
“Harper?” Sara said, raising an eyebrow.  
“It’s neither of our places to comment, Pathfinder.” Lexi stressed the last word, Sara grinned, she got the hint.


	17. I know

The kick to the back of her knees sent Robyn crashing to the floor, her shirt neck digging into her throat as the kicker held her by the scruff of the neck stopping her from face planting the floor. The bindings cut into her, Harris wondered if her wrists would ever be scar free.

Robyn fought to keep control of herself, the hours of isolation she’d endured along with the blindfold making it hard to keep her panic contained, the adrenaline causing her to shake. It was the waiting which tormented her the most, when her captures were dominating her, demanding answers she didn’t have via physical or verbal humiliation, she could take that. Her mind locked itself away in those moments, she could focus on bracing against the flash of pain. So far things had been standard, stress positions, white noise, sensory deprivation, punches and minor burns.

This silence though, the transition from being in isolation to the next round of interrogation these moments pulled at the edges of her, threatening to unravel the tattered edges of her resolve. They never lasted long enough to do any real damage though.

She felt the strong fingers wrap themselves round a fistful of her hair, she felt the tension in the fingers translate to the rippling brace of her tormentor’s arm. Robyn knew better than to resist as her head was thrust downwards.

The ice-cold water flooded her nostrils burning sinuses, Robyn clenched her teeth against the reflex to gasp, her eyes wide behind the blindfold. She felt the small bubbles tumble like lemmings out of her airways, the cold pressure pushing on her eardrums a deafening rush thundering with her own pulse screaming in her ears.

As the initial shock subsided, Robyn closed her eyes despite the dark, she thought of all the times she’d surfed and got pulled under by a wave, pinned in the cyclic current for what felt like an age.

She let her body go limp, tense muscled used up more oxygen, oxygen she didn’t have, the hand on the back of her head didn’t let up.

As the burning in her lungs started Robyn let out a steady stream of bubbled, voiding her lungs, the fear and urge to breath didn’t come from a lack of oxygen but a build up of carbon dioxide.

The action bought her a moment of calm, then it was a personal fight against her own reflexes. She felt her heart rate start to rise, could almost feel the rippling echo of the pulse in her neck on the surface of the water.

As suddenly as it started Robyn was wrenched into the air, she gasped for air through the stream of water and mucus which flooded from her nose, going lightheaded from the shock of the cold and hit of oxygen.

Before she’d had a chance to recover she was submerged again, over and over the process continued, the cold like a vice being ratcheted notch by notch. Then the element of surprise, the boot to her side cracked at least one rib, the pain driving Robyn to inhale a slug of cold water into her searing lungs, her mind screamed the sound of white as her body convulsed like a frantic bull against the matador’s chains.

She was thrown sideways, landing on her damaged side, she felt the splinters grate as she coughed, trying desperately to void her lungs, face down in her own puddle of misery, how had she ended up here?  
\---------------------------------

“We cannot allow this, the Angaran people have suffered enough!” Evfra slammed his fist on the table, the air rippling with his tempter.

The Moshae spoke, her calming tones hiding an edge of distrust, “we barely understand the technology you are describing, our people are scared, first the Scourge, then the Kett, and whilst we are indebted to you Pathfinder, the Initiative hasn’t showered itself in glory.”

Sara resisted the urge to sigh, their apprehension was understandable but hostility wasn’t something Ryder was prepared to entertain. She cast a look at Lieutenant Harris, this had been her idea. 

As Ryder had asked Robyn had delivered a comprehensive document detailing every aspect of the construction of the mass relay. Lists and quantities of materials, costings and timings, staffing requirements, socio and political implications. Robyn had insisted that before anything else the project had agreement from the Angaran’s, they were after all the native species and the last thing either of them wanted was to be seen as colonial imperialists.

Jaal nudged Robyn in the back, she cleared her throat, the room looked at her, Sara had brought her along to answer any technical questions, not to facilitate the negotiations.

“The Initiative wouldn’t own this project, the Angaran’s would.” Robyn let her words sink in before continuing, Evfra fixed her with a searching look, “I have no loyalty to the Initiative, I was brought to Heleus against my will, if we build the relay and if it works, I would want it to be under strict Angaran control, it can be programmed to allow easy policing, nothing enters or leaves Heleus without your say so.”

Ryder tried not to hide her surprise, it was a pretty obvious answer though, and one which she believed the Angaran’s would be agreeable too. Her time in Heleus had taught her that the Angaran’s were driven by discovery and curious just like humans, whilst they certainly feared the unknown part of them would almost be embarrassed by the draw they felt of a trip to the Milky Way.

“Jaal, what do you think?” the Moshae asked.  
Jaal hesitated for a moment, considering his words, “Our horizons have changed so much in such a short space of time, I feel trepidation. However,” Jaal smiled at Robyn, “even the glimmer of hope of seeing the home worlds of my friends, it fills me with, great excitement.”

Evfra nodded to the Moshae, “Let us discuss this in private, we will let you know of our decision in the coming days.”  
\--------------------------------------------------------------  
Ryder brought two glasses over to the table, sitting down opposite Robyn, their conversation quiet but not suspicious.

“So, who came up with that plan?” Sara asked, raising her glass to her lips.  
Robyn replaced her own, the liquid inside wasn’t unpleasant, just, different, “I talked it through with Jaal, I try and think about things from all angles, predicting the likelihood of various outcomes.”

Suvi landed in the empty chair at their table, “how did it go?” she asked, voice full of excitement.

“They’re considering our proposal” Sara stated, doing what Robyn considered a good impression of Evfra.  
“Well that sounds hopeful, doesn’t it?”  
“I think they’re secretly quite excited” Robyn said smiling.

“Pathfinder, can I speak with you?” the Asari diplomat stationed on Aya had arrived at Sara’s shoulder. With the slightest hint of an exasperated eyeroll Ryder stood up.

“So, Dr. Anwar, what boundaries have you been pushing today? What cusp of discovery have you stumbled over? What rock have you licked?”  
Suvi blushed, “oh of course someone told you about that.”  
Robyn laughed, “I read all the Tempest’s logs remember, also, I wouldn’t expect anything less” Harris discretely signalled to the barman to bring Suvi a drink.  
“Well anyway,” Suvi started, gratefully accepting the glass placed in front of her, “I’m cataloguing mineral samples and mosses at the moment, it sounds incredibly dull but coming here it was a blank slate, we have to literally discover, everything.” 

Robyn relaxed into her chair and simply listened, Suvi gradually becoming more and more animated as she described the processes and timelines of the various discoveries in Heleus. She couldn’t help but smile as Suvi found her stride, losing herself in the intricate details, the surprises and humorous anecdotes, Suvi was like a child at Christmas with a huge pile of parcels, not knowing which one to unwrap first.

Suvi faltered, she suddenly found herself feeling self conscious, it wasn’t that she felt uncomfortable, quite the opposite, it had been so long since she’d been able to speak like that, with a willing audience who posed thoughtful questions and challenged her thinking. She was almost embarrassed by how freely she’d opened up; how natural it was to fall into this familiar groove. 

“Hey, you okay?” Robyn asked, the concern evident in her tone. Suvi looked at her, saw the cute furrows in her brow, the messy jet-black hair which complimented her skin tone and those intriguing grey blue eyes that sparked with mischief and energy.

“I’m fine” Suvi stated, although rather unconvincingly, she remembered feeling like this in the city park on Illium, their roles had been reversed then, but still the realisation that she could fall in love with the woman opposite broke over her like dawn.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
Peebee started to drag her feet as she approached the Tempest, the satchel she was carrying was full of Angaran tombs about the Remnant, why they couldn’t digitalise them like any other sentient race she didn’t know. The weight she carried wasn’t the only reason for the decay in her progress towards the ship, she needed to end things with Suvi and force her to face up to what was going on with Robyn. Peebee knew neither of them would cross a physical line but the simple way they were around each other, the small gestures, the pair of them were made for each other and whilst it didn’t make it any easier Peebee knew Robyn could simply give Suvi something she herself could never come close to.

Entering her room, she dropped the satchel on the floor with a welcome sigh, she started when she saw Suvi perched on the edge of her workbench, gloved fingers wrapped around the edge.

Suvi felt like she’d swallowed a box of frogs, the words jumping in the back of her throat, “I can’t do this.”  
Peebee let her shoulders fall, stepping towards Dr Anwar she took the woman’s hands in her own, “I know.”

“I’m sorry,” Suvi tried to force back her tears, “I didn’t mean to fall in love with her all over again.”  
“I know.”

“I thought I was doing the right thing…” Suvi trailed off, she’d made such a mess of this.  
“Hey, stop it,” Peebee gently squeezed her hands and smiled, “you two are made for each other, I’m almost loathed to admit it but Robyn completes you in a way I never could. Whatever God you believe in, while you may not agree with His methods, He’s brought her here, not many people get a second chance with their soulmate.”

“What do I do now?” Suvi asked, meeting Peebee’s eye for the first time.  
“You go find her and tell her how you feel, you voice any doubt or fears and work out your happy ending.”

“And you?”  
Peebee shrugged, “meh, I’ll get too drunk and letch over Sara” she shifted her tone, “seriously, I’ll be fine, although I will kick her ass if she hurts you, and I’ll do the same to you because I might actually prefer her” Peebee winked as Suvi pushed her in the chest, both of them smiling, the tension broken, the relief palpable.   
\--------------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi walked through the Tempest, before she went in search of Robyn there was one other awkward conversation she needed to have, she cursed herself and her morbid curiosity as she entered the hydroponics lab.

Cora looked up from the report she was writing, she didn’t often get visitors, “Hey Suvi, everything okay?”  
Suvi crossed her arms and leant on one of the supporting struts, she was a little unsure how to proceed. 

“I’m on my way to see Robyn, I’ve ended things with Peebee.”  
Cora smiled as she continued to type, “took you long enough Anwar.”  
“Are okay with it?” Suvi blurted, cringing at her own awkwardness.  
Cora laughed, “what? Why?”

Suvi shifted uncomfortably, she couldn’t meet Cora’s questioning gaze, “well, there were rumours you and Robyn…“ she trailed off.

With dawning realisation Cora pinched the bridge of her nose, “sit down Suvi, I’ll explain, who told you?”

“I overheard Vetra and Drack talking, she’d errm heard you two, apparently it was hard not to” Suvi felt herself blushing.

Cora sighed, “look, me and Harris have become good friends, nothing more, we were both having a rough time, and well marines either let go via drinking, drugs, violence or sex. We both just needed an escape route from the chaos, somewhere safe.”

Cora was trying to explain without digging herself into a hole, she continued, “we haven’t spoken about it since, there are no ‘knowing looks’ or inside jokes, it was just a thing that happened, that we both needed.”

“Does Scott know?” Suvi asked.

“No, and I’d prefer it if he didn’t” Cora decided to be completely honest, “Suvi, Scott was one of the reasons it happened, I like him but he’s fresh and needs time, I was, tense shall we say? I didn’t want things with him to be driven by my stress, I wanted to be patient with him, for us to find ourselves at our own pace.”

Suvi nodded, she didn’t totally understand but she knew enough.

“I guess I should be saying ‘thank you’, for being there for her, and I don’t mean that crudely, I know she values your friendship.”

“Just take it steady okay,” Cora tried her best not to sound too mumsy, “she’s barely holding it together, you’re both different people now and whilst I know how much she loves you, she’s pretty battered right now.”

Suvi smiled weakly, “yeah I don’t even know where to start.”  
“At the beginning” Cora replied simply.


	18. Cape & Everything

Robyn’s shoulders had gone numb with pain, she was grateful for the small mercy of her captures suspending her in a crucifix with energy shackles, at least her wrists were getting a break. The weight of her body, pulled at her shoulders, the muscles red with fury, twitching and bulbous.

Somewhere along the way the blindfold had been removed, the tepid light simply washed the bare room in an unhealthy glow, like the haze from a smoke-filled bar. Three asari hung back in the shadows, the one who had initiated the drowning, Kendra, seemed to be orchestrating proceedings. The other two simply handed her whatever instrument of torture took her fancy.

“It’s only going to get worse” Kendra purred, her hot breath a sharp contrast on Robyn’s ear, “give up the location of the relay and this will stop” her words were like silk, flowing over the rough patches of Robyn’s mind. “The Alpha is coming, and she won’t be pleased to see such defiance.”  
Robyn raised her head, staring hard at the Asari, a smile on her lips “let her come, then the fun can begin.”  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi found Robyn in engineering, the Lieutenant busy running test diagnostics and functionality reports. Robyn smiled at her visitor, “give me five?” she asked.

Suvi nodded and sat on a supply box, it was the one irritating thing about the Tempest, there weren’t enough chairs. She watched Robyn in profile, working to interpret the results, making adjustments, her face bathed in the glow of the idling drive core.

Robyn set the final sequences to run, stepped away from the terminal and walked over to Suvi, she leant on the wall, arms crossed across her chest, the toe of one boot resting on the floor behind her other leg, “what’s up?”

Suvi took all of her in, the casual sexiness of Robyn Harris drove her crazy, she couldn’t help but smile, she felt giddy and relieved at finally being free to feel whatever she wanted for this woman.

“Do you have plans this evening?”  
Robyn’s brow furrowed in surprise, “no, why?”  
“Will you have dinner with me?” Suvi asked sheepishly, feeling the heat start to rise in her cheeks.  
“Just you and me?” Robyn asked, an eyebrow raised, “like a date?”  
Suvi nodded, “like a date” the words felt alien in her mouth but she couldn’t help but grin as she said them.  
Robyn studied her for a moment, “okay.”  
“Okay?” Suvi hadn’t realised she’d been holding her breath, “pick you up at seven?”  
Robyn smiled, “sure, seven is good.”  
\----------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn knocked on the Pathfinder’s door.  
“Off duty, unless it’s a crisis, no pathfinding.” The muffled reply.  
“I guess it’s a kind of a low-level crisis” Robyn called back.

The door clicked open. Robyn walked in to find Sara and Lexi sat at opposite ends of the couch each with datapads in hand.  
Robyn couldn’t help but smile at the cuteness of the pair, so utterly adorable.

“Quit flashing your winning smile Harris, what’s your low-level crisis?” Sara asked.  
“Can I borrow a shirt?” Robyn asked flatly.  
Sara stared, “that is your crisis?”  
Lexi nudged her girlfriend, “come on be nice.”

“Look” Robyn said, showing her palms, “I literally own two compression shirts and my fatigues, neither of which I really want to wear to dinner.”  
“Ah, now the real crisis shows itself” Lexi mused.  
Sara grinned and untangled herself “okay Harris, let’s see what we can find, what are you thinking?”  
“Ideally something that doesn’t carry any AI branding, and, well, something I’ll look good in.”  
Sara raised an eyebrow, “you could wear anything and look good” Robyn blushed.  
“Sara stop making her blush” Lexi scolded.  
“It’s true!” Sara couldn’t resist, “you’ve managed to turn Harper after all.”  
Robyn coughed, “what!?”

Sara looked up from the draw of clothes she was rifling through, “you’re dates with Cora, right?”  
Robyn laughed, “no, it’s with Suvi, Cora is a) very straight, and b) digging your brother.”  
Sara stared, “but you two…” she trailed off.

Lexi was shaking trying to supress her laughter.

“Yeah, we did, it was just a thing that happened, I was packing the right loadout, if you catch my drift.”  
Sara grinned, “Nyx was saying Harper, really, enjoyed your loadout” she winked for effect.

Robyn rolled her eyes, “of course she liked my dick, she hadn’t seen one in six hundred years and making girls come is my specialist subject.”

Lexi couldn’t cope she snorted with laughter at the pair of them.

“So, hang on” Lexi had calmed down enough to speak, “if you’re going on a date with Suvi does that mean we have an angsty Asari to deal with?”  
“I didn’t ask” Robyn admitted, “I’m just being taken out to dinner and would really rather not wear combat gear.”

“Here” Sara threw a plain black t-shirt at Harris, “wear that, with those black jeans you’ve got and your dress brogues, she’ll melt.”

Robyn ran a hand through her hair and smiled at Sara, “thanks.”  
Sara shook her head, “honestly Harris, if you knew how hot you were you’d be dangerous, now take your smile and get out.”

As the door closed behind Robyn, Sara made herself at home again on the couch.  
“You have a crush” Lexi stated, eyes twinkling.  
“You’re not so innocent T’Perro, I’ve seen you look” Sara retorted huffily.  
“Oh, I’m fully aware of my reaction to the Lieutenants sex appeal” Lexi smiled, teasingly, “it’s you humans that get all het up about such things.”  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn was trying her best not to pace the cargo hold, she’d dressed as advised but still felt out of her depth.

“Looking good Harris” Scott called from the upper deck, Robyn closed her eyes and cringed.  
“Thank you, Scott.”

Peebee and Vetra walked out of the armoury as Scott continued, “someone’s off on a hot date.”  
Robyn looked apologetically at Peebee who just smiled, “seriously Scott, just stop.”

Peebee walked towards Robyn placing a gentle hand on her shoulder, “don’t worry” she said kindly, before adding, “she never wore that for me” as she walked away.

Robyn spun round, Suvi stood looking slightly awkward in a beautiful navy-blue halter-neck dress, the colour was rich and reminded Robyn of a winters sunset as the last tinges of orange slip away to leave the cool inky darkness.

Scott let out a long low whistle.  
“So, help me Scott if you don’t leave I’ll break your nose, again.” Robyn’s voice dangerously low, though she didn’t take her eyes off Suvi’s.

Finally, when they had the cargo bay to themselves both women breathed a sigh of relief.  
“You look stunning Dr Anwar” Robyn said as she placed a soft kiss to Suvi’s cheek.  
“Thank you, Lieutenant” her reply as she slipped her arm through Robyn’s.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn focused on remembering every detail of that dress, how the colour suited Suvi perfectly, how it made her eyes shine a little brighter, how the folds of fabric moved fluidly over her curves.

The pain from the knife in her thigh clawed at her thoughts, the slow trickle of blood, soaking her trousers, sticking to her leg an uncomfortable itch she couldn’t relieve. 

She tried to steady her breathing, distracting herself by remembering every detail of that evening, it hadn’t ended with rainbows and butterflies but it had marked the start of her healing in Andromeda.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
“So, where we heading?” Robyn asked, the warm evening air enveloped her exposed skin, it felt like the first moments she’d been able to fully enjoy the splendour of Aya.

Suvi leant into her as they walked, she was acutely aware of the skin on skin contact of their arms as they moved through the city, “Jaal’s recommendation, he said it would suit us and arranged the table, apparently they know we’re coming and have food we can eat, no stress.”

“He’s a good egg” Robyn said smiling.

The Angaran hospitality was once again outstanding, their host showed them to a table tucked away on a balcony which overlooked one of the many waterfalls, the light from the setting sun making the spray sparkle orange and red.

They sat close, knees touching and arms brushing as they worked their way through multiple small dishes, sharing and critiquing, a scientific culinary endeavour. 

As the sun set it was replaced with the flickering light of lanterns suspended in the canopy above, Robyn wrapped her arm around Suvi’s shoulder as they moved closer finishing their delicate cups of tea. Suvi’s hand rested on Robyn’s thigh as she let her head fall to the offered shoulder.

“This evening has been perfect” Robyn whispered.  
Suvi kissed the Lieutenant’s cheek, “can we eek it out a little longer?”  
“Come on I have an idea.”  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
The walk to the viewpoint was short and the air was still warm despite the hour, “Jaal said you got amazing views of the moons rising from here” Robyn said as she led them to a small plateau overlooking the valley, the world falling away from their feet.

“He was right” Suvi breathed, the scene before them was breath taking. The light from the moons highlighting distant ridges, the star filled sky an endless bowl above them, even the burning shadow of the Scourge looked beautiful.

They turned to each other, Robyn carefully resting her hands on Suvi’s waist and feeling the other woman’s hands on her shoulders, their foreheads came to rest on one another. “This is so right” Suvi whispered.

Robyn smiled, “did you ever watch Superman?”  
Suvi looked at her, “what? That ancient superhero who could fly?”  
Robyn laughed, “yeah, he had a cape and everything.”  
“I didn’t watch it but I know what you’re talking about.”  
Robyn’s voice was a hushed whisper, “well Clark Kent, a.k.a superman, falls in love with Lois Lane, but Lois falls in love with superman, who she doesn’t know is really Clark.”  
“Wait, how can she not know?” Suvi always posed the crucial questions.  
“Clearly in the 1990’s spectacles really could define a persons look” Robyn chuckled, “anyway, there is this scene where Superman and Lois kiss for the first time and I’ve always wanted to do it.”

Suvi’s couldn’t help but grin at the playful twinkle in Robyn’s eye, “okay, superman, lead the way.”

Robyn firmed her grip on Suvi’s waist, she concentrated on wrapping her biotics around them both. Suvi gasped and held on a little tighter to Robyn’s shoulders as she felt her feet leave the ground, she’d never experienced the fluttering softness of dark energy on her before.

They settled a few feet from the ground, Robyn grinned, Suvi marvelled, “how long can you hold it?” Suvi asked.  
“Long enough” Robyn whispered as their lips met.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
On the approach to the Tempest Suvi sensed the shift in Robyn, the tension building with each footstep, it felt like she was slipping further and further away.

Suvi stopped and pulled her into the shadow of some towering cargo crates, she let her hand reach Robyn’s cheek and softly kissed her, “what is it?” She asked tenderly.

Robyn pressed her back into the hard surface of containers, she sighed, not sure she could put how she was feeling into words. Suvi stepped closer, pulling her into a hug, “just say it, I’m here.”

Robyn felt the wave of emotion flood through her, she fought to keep control but could already feel herself start to tremble, she buried herself in Suvi’s shoulder, “you know I’d love to slip you out of this beautiful dress and make love to you.”

Suvi kissed the join where Robyn’s earlobe met her neck, “but you can’t right now” Suvi finished, “and that’s okay.” She kissed away the tears which ran down Robyn’s face, “what do you need?”

Robyn felt part of her panic ebb away, she looked at Suvi, relieved not to see a flicker of disappointment “my PJ’s and a snuggle.”  
Suvi smiled, she took Robyn’s hand in hers, “come on.”  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------  
She desperately needed water, her mouth was horrendously dry, her tongue swollen, lay limp and clogging, shrivelling with each pained breath.

Kendra had left, she’d often vanish for hours at a time leaving her two sentries, even they were flagging, a single Asari stood trying not to look at her in the corner.

Robyn coughed, a small rumble, like a frustrating itch you can’t scratch at the back of her throat. She let it continue, heaving each time against her shackles for dramatic effect. The Asari shifted uncomfortably, before standing and leaving the room. Robyn let her body sag.

Lisana T’Lesso walked in carrying a water canteen and a cloth. She strode purposefully to the suspended marine and carefully allowed her to drink, Kendra would be gone for a few more hours, this was worth the risk. She then poured a little water on the cloth and wiped Robyn’s face, leaving her skin feeling cool and exposed.

“Thank you” Robyn whispered.  
Lisana paused and looked at her, “Fraya took pity on you but is too scared of Kendra.”

“I get the impression you both thought you left all this behind in the milky way? Andromeda was your new start? I didn’t even know you were a commando.” Robyn said the relief at being given water evident in her voice.

“We live a long time Lieutenant, I’ve had many different roles. My time with Kendra was brief, I wasn’t as good a commando as I am a pilot. As for your surprise, I attended your memorial.”

Robyn stared at her, this news shocked her, she’d met Lisana on the Citadel, they’d worked together in the same rescue team, how funny the many coincidences life throws at you, “I had no idea.”

“No, and you won’t know that I was called to Illium too, that Fraya made an unsuccessful attempt to break into your apartment, that we were both part of the unit which stalked your every move. When you died I thought it was over, then you turn up at the wrong time in the wrong place.”

“I feel like I should be apologising for your involvement in this.”  
“Just don’t die Lieutenant, I watched you give everything to save strangers from the wreckage of buildings, don’t make me go against Kendra.”  
\----------------------------------------------------------------  
“We agree” Evfra stated, “but there are terms.”  
Robyn and Sara looked at each other, of course there are terms they both thought.

“The only non-angaran involved will be Lieutenant Harris, you will be embedded in the build team to oversee proceedings.”  
There was more but that was the standout statement. Robyn countered.

“The physical build will take a matter of weeks, the resources needed are minimal and the design is simple. I will happily co-ordinate construction, however, I must be planet based, it is imperative I have no knowledge of the location of the relay.”

Evfra studied her, the Moshae spoke, “why?”

“I didn’t come to Andromeda willingly, I was kidnapped, my death in the Milky Way was faked, I was being hunted. There is a high probability that sleeper agents infiltrated the Initiative.” Evfra tensed at the news.

“You are in danger?” Evfra’s tone held an element of concern Robyn hadn’t expected.  
“Yes, although I can’t imagine there will be that many, or that they’ll feel particularly compelled to complete their mission now their master is long dead. I have a plan to deal with them.” Robyn hadn’t mentioned this to anyone but sooner or later all the loose ends needed to be tied up.

“Fine, we will make space for you at our science station on Voeld, what is your plan to deal with your enemies, how can we help?”  
Robyn stared at him, she hadn’t anticipated such kindness, “I plan to leak information to draw them out into the open, from then on we’ll see.”

It turned out Robyn needn’t have put that much thought into it.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------  
“Voeld Robyn?” Suvi stared at her, “you know Voeld is a frigid desolate hell hole?”

“It can’t be worse than Elaaden, I thought I’d never stop sweating, plus it’s only going to be for a few weeks.” Robyn was sat on the step next to Suvi’s station on the bridge.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Suvi asked quietly.  
“It’s the only way to end it Suvi, they’ll be here, in the shadows, just waiting, I need to finish this.” Robyn stood up and gathered up the collection of mugs on Suvi’s terminal.

Suvi pouted at her leaving, “don’t give me that look Anwar, I’ve got a faulty valve actuator to replace otherwise nobody is getting a shower later.”

Suvi turned back to her work, she could see Kallo giving her a sideways glance from the corner of her eye.

“Say it Kallo.”  
“Oh nothing,” Kallo feigned surprise, “it’s just, I’ve never seen you this happy.”  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
It turned out Suvi had been partially correct, Voeld was a frigid hell hole, but there was also a beauty to it, the way the light refracted through the ice and the constant dance of the aurora, the green tones making Robyn feel like she was living on the bottom of an ocean.

The first few weeks of construction had gone without a hitch, the Angaran’s worked methodically and Robyn found leadership easy, they’d made her feel welcome and whilst she was back to living in a closet, it was exciting to see the progress being made daily.

Robyn opened her Omni-tool selecting an incoming message from Vetra, the turian had been nothing short of a miracle worker getting raw materials to the build site. This note concerned a more personal requisition, Vetra had finally managed to secure her some proper cold weather gear and some extra clothing, it was waiting at the Voeld outpost.  
The Angaran watchmen nodded their greeting as Robyn hopped into one of the pool rovers, she often borrowed a vehicle to explore the planet in her downtime, the ruined Kett bases and glacial structures providing a distraction from the cold and her missing Suvi.

She’d been to the outpost a couple of times but found it too frantic, she was always pleasant to the outpost leader though and did what she could to help out if she had time.  
As she stepped through the main doors Robyn shook herself and stomped her feet, showering the entranceway in snow, as she pulled down her hood she looked up and looked straight into the eyes of an Asari. Robyn felt the punch of recognition pass between the two of them, flashes of memories pricked at her temple, they’d worked together on the Citadel, during the relief effort. Robyn watched as the Asari’s eyes widened. 

Her companion turned turned and looked over her shoulder.

Her eye’s bore into Robyn’s very soul, she’d seen that look before, she felt the air empty from her lungs and the ground shift, she remembered this woman brushing past her, too close in an ISSAC hallway, the Asari’s commando boots at odds with the science uniform she’d worn.

Robyn turned and ran back to the rover, frantically trying to open a comm link to SAM.  
“SAM, send me everything you have about Liana T’Lesso, former Citadel pilot.”  
“One moment”

Robyn had started to drive back to the science station, she pulled under the shadow of a cliff to scan through the incoming documents from SAM. Her eyes widened as she realised the length’s Tevos had gone to.

“SAM, can you cross reference the entire Initiative population register with names listed as serving with Talein’s Daughters.”  
“Working, there are four matches Lieutenant.”

Robyn looked at the four lines of text on her Omni-tool, she felt her stomach drop as she read the final name, “fuck.”

The RPG struck the ice near the rear of the rover, the impact enough to send the vehicle rolling, Robyn didn’t even feel the impact of her head hitting the console as she blacked out.


	19. Eye of the Storm

Cora rested her forearms on the railing overlooking the cargo bay, since Harris had started her secondment on Voeld, Harper had gone back to her pre-bed routine of carrying a mug of too hot tea around the ship until it cooled enough to drink.

It had been a crazy few months but the feeling that things were settling down was a welcome relief, she thought about Scott, they’re seedling of a relationship starting to take and grow, she laughed at herself as she realised she couldn’t help but smile when she thought about it.

Her Omni-tool buzzed breaking her thoughts, she sighed and flipped open the message.

_Alpha,_   
_Adiona has awoken, we have her, your allegiance to Talein is called upon._   
_Kendra_

The mug slipped from Cora’s fingers, the crash reverberating through the cargo hold, the splatter of her tea a jagged edged puddle on the lower deck.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------  
Sara Ryder stepped out of the shower, towelling herself off before striding into her bedroom, she searched for some underwear under the watchful gaze of Dr T’Perro.

“Those are surplus to requirement Pathfinder” Lexi stated, “but dry your hair properly you’re dripping everywhere.”  
Ryder snatched up her towel to do as she was told, melting under the smouldering look Lexi was giving her.

Both women jumped, Sara actually yelping in shock as Cora stormed into the Pathfinder’s quarters.  
“Harper, knocking, it’s a thing” Sara said as she tried to cover herself in what she now realised was too small a towel.

Cora opened her mouth, then closed it, staring at Sara, she turned around and faced the door, “right, yes, sorry, I didn’t think” she took a few steadying breathes.

“Cora what’s going on?” Lexi asked, her brow creased in concern, it took a lot shake the unshakable.  
Cora turned around, “they’ve got Harris.”  
\--------------------------------------------------------------  
Sara, Lexi, Scott, Cora and Peebee stood around the meeting room table talking in hushed whispers. “What have we got? SAM, you start.”

“Sara, Lieutenant Harris knew she was in danger and was attempting to drive back to the science station, she identified the common link of Talein’s Daughters, our connection was terminated but sound analysis indicates a nearby explosion consistent with an RPG.” SAM stated, they all listened carefully.

“Which means she knows I’ll be called” Cora whispered.

“Her SAM implant is working so we have her location and vitals” Lexi said interfacing her omni-tool with the meeting room displays. All at once the projectors twisted with information, a GPS location started to lock down as graphs and charts detailed Robyn’s stats.

Lexi worked quickly to interpret the results, “high levels of stress hormone, sharp peaks in neural activity and heart rate, strange, there are signs of severe oxygen depletion.”

“They’re torturing her” Cora stated simply. All eyes were on her, “the Asari aren’t the great and the good they perceive themselves as, the tactics they use rely heavily on intelligence gathering, no matter what the cost.”

“See, this is why Asari suck” Peebee said in exasperation.   
“Okay, so what’s the plan?” Scott asked.

Sara flicked through the geo-locations, “she’s on Kadara in what looks like a cave network, Cora have you made contact?”  
Cora nodded, “I’ve confirmed I’m on my way, the nav point I’ve been sent matches with Robyn’s location.”

Peebee scrunched her brow, “something doesn’t fit here, they’ve taken Harris but still contacted you…” she trailed off.

“They don’t know” Sara breathed, “if Harris hadn’t literally walked into them they wouldn’t have known she was in Andromeda, so they don’t know she’s part of the Pathfinder team.”

“Which means Cora can walk right in.” Everyone turned to look at the speaker, Suvi Anwar moved with purpose, her whole body seemed to glow with quiet rage, she pinned her focus on Cora, “bring her back” she looked around at her colleagues, “whatever you have to do to end this, just do it.”  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------  
Nobody on the Tempest complained about being asked to man their station in the middle of the night. Kallo slipped into his seat and silently keyed in co-ordinates, readying the Tempest for flight. He knew words couldn’t help quell the anguish of his best friend, all he could offer her now was to perform his duty to the best of his ability.

Cora swallowed hard as she opened the lid of a storage crate she’d neglected since arriving in Andromeda, just hearing the name Talein made her skin crawl, the humiliation they’d put her through, how hard she’d tried to please them and they treated her like nothing.

She steadied her rising temper, thinking about Harris helped, she was doing this for someone greater than herself. She unfurled her commando leathers and started to prepare.   
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
Cora strode onto the bridge to join the rest of the team, they were making their final approach to Kadara, she felt self conscious in the leathers, their matt black finish and contoured reinforcement accentuated parts of her she didn’t usually wish to show off, she did feel good though.

“Okay, so final run through” Sara started to speak, “Harper will take the Nomad and walk through the front door. SAM has identified a ventilation shaft that uses a fissure in the rock, me, Peebee and Scott will climb down, hopefully bypassing perimeter security, when we’re in place we’ll storm the building.” Sara waited until she’d received affirmative nods before continuing, “Vetra and Drack, I want you both at the cave entrance providing any cover necessary for extraction.”

“Everyone make final preps, let’s bring her home.”

As Cora made the final checks of her pistol, Scott came to her side, “you okay?” He asked.  
Cora smiled, “they’ve made it personal, you should never make it personal.”  
Scott gaped at her, the attitude the armour, he felt his mouth dry, “stay safe” he managed.  
Cora pressed a finger to his lips, “it’ll be fine” her voice dropped, “you can peel me out of these later.”  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn had fallen into a stupor, her bodies constant scream of pain becoming white noise, but now, the measured click of heels on metal brought her back to the room. She blinked to clear her vision and smiled as Cora Harper stepped into the room looking every bit the Alpha Commando.

Kendra slapped her hard round the face, “what’s funny Lieutenant?”  
Robyn looked up and met Cora’s gaze, “finally someone who looks like they know what to do” Robyn spat at Kendra.

“Leave us” Cora’s voice was low and dangerous. The three Asari looked at her, before turning and leaving the room.  
Once alone Cora walked in a slow circle around Robyn, she knew the room would be monitored, she had to be careful, she slipped the injection pump out of a side pocket, slamming it into the Lieutenant’s shoulder.

Robyn let out a growl of pain, Cora whispered in her ear, “Lexi sends her regards.”

Breathing heavily, her ribs pulsing Robyn felt the initial sting subside and the rush of pain relief and stimulants flood her body. The Navy called it a Vit Brick, a cocktail of painkillers, vitamins, amino acids and stims which were deployed to frontline soldiers to combat injury and sleep deprivation, marines had been known to walk on fractured legs following a hit.

Kendra stormed in, “what the hell are you doing?”  
“Getting her to talk” Cora glowered, “clearly your methods have done nothing.”  
“We just haven’t found the right stimulus” Kendra purred, she handed Cora a jar, “do the honours?”

Cora worked hard to set her face, things had escalated, Robyn was doing well to stay conscious the stress of the hold, knife in her leg and whatever other hell Kendra had inflicted left her body torn, muscles mercilessly firing, flickering under her skin.

Harper walked towards Robyn, unscrewing the lid she loaded her fingers with the thick gel inside, she hoped Harris would forgive her, she hoped she’d understand that until the rest of the team arrived she had no choice. Cora slavered the exposed stomach and back of the Lieutenant and stepped back, accepting the length of coarse rope Kendra offered.

Kendra walked behind Harris, her own rope in hand, Cora didn’t dare break eye contact with Robyn, she needed to be with her through this.

Nothing that had come before could prepare Robyn for the onslaught of pain as her torso was enveloped in flames, the gel ignited by Kendra, whilst it left not a mark on the skin burned like molten metal.

She withered against the restraints, her scream curdling in her throat.

Then the beating started, rhythmical lashings front and back until her skin beaded with blood the flesh wounds ragged.

Cora tried not to vomit, she couldn’t take three on one but this was too much.

“Ready to talk yet Lieutenant?” Kendra purred in her ear.  
Robyn turned her limp head to the side, facing down her adversary, her hair plastered to her face with sweat, “this is just foreplay Kendra, you and your Alpha” she whipped the word into the air, “are doing little more than turning me on.”

Robyn saw almost too late the darkness which enveloped Kendra’s eyes, the twisting tendrils like the Scourge, the Asari grabbed Robyn’s jaw as she hissed “embrace eternity” into the air.

Harris could feel Kendra’s mind rushing towards hers, the hurricane swarming at her limits, not strong enough to push back Robyn started reciting the periodic table followed by complex equations, definitions and postulates, anything and everything she could recount to appose the bombardment of her mind. She could feel Kendra clawing at her thoughts in a frantic search, like running through a library pulling books down and throwing archives into the air.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------  
“I really hope this doesn’t get any narrower” Peebee hissed as the trio forced themselves downwards. The crevice in the rock barely wide enough for them to climb down in their armour which scraped on fingers of rock.

“We’ve got to be nearly down” Sara muttered.

“Can anyone else smell bacon?” Scott murmured, neither Sara nor Peebee had chance to form a whitty retort, the unmistakable sound of a person in utter agony reverberated through the shaft. They all looked at each other and continued to scramble downwards as quickly as they could.

They tried to ignore the swish of the whips and the whimpers of their crewmate which became weaker which each blow, the very air around them seemed to be teasing them, taunting them for not being quick enough.

Finally, Sara slammed her boot through the grate at the bottom and the threesome tumbled down into what looked like a control room, two terrified looking Asari backed against a wall raising their hands.

Peebee got to her feet and drew her pistol, “Lisara?”   
“Wait you know each other?” Scott said, drawing his rifle.  
“Why is an ice runner and a maiden whose holding her pistol the wrong way around, torturing my engineer?” Sara glowered, Fraya tried to turn her pistol around, fumbling and dropped it to the ground.

“Because Kendra can’t let shit go and Asari have some fucked up sense of duty” Lisara sighed, “Look, we wanted nothing to do with this, I know that’s no excuse but just get in their and save Harris before Kendra breaks her mind.”  
\----------------------------------------------------------  
All at once it was over, Robyn felt herself clatter to the ground, the energy shackles broken, she concertinaed into a heap, her arms furious as the blood returned.

The door was blasted off its hinges as Sara and Scott stormed in, Kendra hardly had a chance to turn around before Cora was on her pinning her against the wall.

Scott and Peebee grabbed either side of Robyn hoisting her up and dragging her towards the door. Robyn came to, her body spewing with anger and rage and hurt and grief. She tore herself from their grip and launched herself at Kendra, ripping her to the floor Robyn pinned a knee to the Asari’s chest and stared deep into her eyes as her hands closed around the woman’s throat.

For just a moment Robyn felt in control, she finally had a physical hook to hang all her turmoil on, a beacon in the waves drawing her into the stillness of the eye of the storm.

Then it shattered in a spray of bone fragments and purple bloody pulp, the Asari’s forehead evaporating in front of her.

Robyn turned her rage on the shouter, her primal howl splitting her open. Cora stared her down “it wouldn’t have solved anything, it wouldn’t have made you feel better, it wouldn’t have taken the hurt away.”

Robyn felt the fight leave her, felt the emptiness start to fill her. Cora pulled her to her feet, “come on Lieutenant, let’s go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On the home stretch now, but still time for plenty of feels.
> 
> A huge thank you to those of you who have taken the time to comment, I appreciate every keystroke, the Lieutenant is humbled to know people care about her.
> 
> I literally have no idea what I'll do with myself when I finish editing the final few chapters.


	20. Call & Answer

Drack carefully carried Robyn through the Tempest, it had been too much to hope that Robyn would manage the trip under her own steam, the physical and mental trauma finally sinking in.

Lexi was waiting in the Med bay her equipment already prepped, Drack gently sat Robyn on the end of the bed, “you did good kid” he muttered, turning to leave.

Robyn stared at the space between her feet, she didn’t know which part of her hurt the most, simply remembering to breath seemed to be taking up most of her mental capacity.

Lexi placed her hand on the Lieutenant’s cheek, who looked up, her gaze distant and vacant. 

“Treating you is going to be painful, do you want me to put you out?”   
A barely noticeable nod.

As gently as she could Lexi injected the sedative into Robyn and guided the young woman onto the pillow as the drug took hold.  
\-----------------------------------------------------  
Suvi Anwar never chewed gum, but today she had to resort to something to stop her grinding her teeth, her jaw ached from being clenched for so long. She felt desperately hopeless but trusted her crewmates to the nth degree.

She sat stiffly in her seat as Kallo took them out of Kadara’s atmosphere.

Sara walked silently across the bridge, still in her under armour, she placed a hand on her science officers shoulder. Suvi looked up, Sara saw the hurt and helplessness. “Go to her” Sara spoke softly, “Lexi has had to put her under and she’s a mess, but go and be with her.”

Suvi walked through the ship in a trance, she pulled off her gloves and jacket, suddenly feeling hot. Her hand went to her mouth as she walked into the med bay. Robyn lay naked, prone, the blade in her thigh erect, totally at odds with the gentle contours of muscled legs. The bruising and torn skin on her torso making her look like a pummelled piece of meat. But her face was untouched, almost peaceful, the shallow rise and fall of the Lieutenant’s chest steadying Suvi’s own.

Lexi finished arranging the drips of fluid and various drugs which were meandering their way into Robyn’s body, mapping their way through her veins.

“What can I do?” Suvi asked.  
Lexi handed her a tube of antiseptic cleanser, “apply this to her wrists.”

Whilst Suvi carefully treated the sores on Robyn’s forearms Lexi removed the knife from her leg, flooding the wound and deftly closing the two sides with three neat stiches, a smear of medi gel completed the fix.

Lexi handed Suvi a pair of thick rubber gloves whilst pulling on her own, answering Anwar’s questioning look, “we need to use a pretty potent solvent on her torso and back.”

Suvi felt her skin cool through the gloves as the volatile solution evaporated from the surface. She doused a fibreless cloth in the clear liquid, “what is this stuff?” Suvi asked as she started to dab at the residue on Robyn’s chest.

Lexi fought to keep her tone neutral, “it’s a hydrocarbon based gel that clings to the skin, it prevents the skin from being damaged but amplifies sensation. It’s applied, then set alight, as the flames die the subject is beaten.” Suvi had gone pale.

“And the use of a solvent to clean it off is some kind of sick insult to injury?” Suvi scowled.  
“Yes” Lexi said simply, she bit her tongue against her anger.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------  
Lexi, Sara, Suvi and Cora sat in the Pathfinder’s quarters, they’d all showered and changed, Robyn was still under sedation the medi gel and fluids doing their job.

“So, where are we at?” Sara asked, she felt drained, sleep felt like a distant memory.  
“Physically, most of the injuries are fairly superficial, by the time she wakes up the medi gel will have healed the majority of the wounds, she’ll still feel broken but that’ll pass.” Lexi explained.

“What about mentally?” Cora questioned, “the Asari forced a meld, I don’t know what Harris had to do to fight it.”  
Lexi shifted uncomfortably, “the human mind is a delicate place at the best of times, there’s no way to tell if they’ll be lasting damage, in the short term we can anticipate severe depression, nightmares, flashbacks, panic…” 

Suvi cut in “Everything, basically.”

Lexi nodded, “her nervous system has been placed under extreme stress, it’s likely the slightest thing will overwhelm her.”

“So, what can we do?” Sara asked.

Suvi handed Sara a datapad, “what’s this?”

“A request for a leave of absence”  
“Granted” Sara’s reply instant, “where are you taking her?”  
“I haven’t figured that out yet, somewhere out of the way.” Suvi hadn’t had a chance to think beyond requesting the leave.  
“Use the Cabin, as long as you need, its isolated but close enough to the Hyperion that you won’t have to live on protein paste.” Sara started tapping her omni-tool making arrangements for supplies to be dropped off.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
The first two weeks were hell.

Robyn barely spoke, barely ate and barely slept, although her body was still her mind was in pieces, she stared into the middle distance, hardly noticing the passage of time, trapped in an endless cycle of never ending scenes, reruns of every moment of hurt she’d ever suffered.

Suvi tried her best, for the most part she sat quietly and read, not really seeing the words on the page. Loud noises and bright lights, even the gentlest of touches made Robyn flinch as it reverberated through her.

Suvi dreaded the hours of darkness most, night after night of waking next to Robyn trashing in her sleep, tangled in sweat drenched sheets as she fought her enemies over and over again.

In the third week the storm came, Suvi hadn’t noticed the distant rumble of thunder until it had built to a crescendo shaking the very walls of the Cabin. Robyn stood on the edge of the cliff watching the lightening flicker through the clouds, marvelled at the speed and beauty. Great fat droplets of rain made the air heavy, pummelling her shoulders, soaking her to her very core, it was as though nature had heard her cry and brought weather to reflect what Robyn struggled to articulate.

Suvi pulled a jacket around herself and slipped her hand into Robyn’s, for the first time in what felt like an eternity Robyn squeezed back.  
Robyn gestured to the storm, “God has answered you, he’s showing you all of me.”

Suvi started to understand.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
In week five, Jaal visited, he wasn’t alone. 

The Cabin felt stuffed with the two Angaran men folded into it but they brought a calm to the space, for a moment the quartet sat together and drank tea, although Robyn said little she didn’t feel overwhelmed by the conversation and could follow the threads.

Whilst Suvi refilled the teapot Evfra placed a hand on Robyn’s knee, “come outside a moment.”

Robyn followed the soothing giant out into the meadow at the front of the Cabin, the whisper of the long grass in the wind making the hairs stand up on her arms.

“I wanted you to know that your team has completed construction of the Relay.”  
Robyn felt reality hit her like a brick, she hadn’t given it a single thought, “I didn’t know they’d carried on” she said weakly.

Evfra place his giant hands on her shoulders, “you command a great deal of respect Lieutenant, your team were proud to serve.”

Suddenly the thought of responsibility, of people depending on her was too much, if it hadn’t been for Evfra, Robyn would have crumbled to the ground. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her, Robyn buried herself against his chest as her tears came. Evfra was a different feeling to Jaal, Robyn felt the solid mass of his chest against her, breathed in his pulse and let herself get lost in the rise and fall of his chest, she imagined this is what it must have felt like to be a child in her father’s arms, a life buoy, saving grace.

“Rest now” his voice low so only Robyn could hear, “your battle is over, this pain will pass, know we are with you, know we will be at your side should you call.”

Robyn felt relief, she didn’t know what from, maybe just finally having the ability to cry, she whipped her face. The pair turned and walked back to the house.

As they readied to leave Evfra handed Robyn a terminal, she recognised it as the one she’d used at the science station, “when you are ready” he said, “your team are able and willing.”

Robyn took it, feeling the measured weight in her hands, the cool metal and smooth edges, Suvi smiled as Robyn spoke, “it might not be tomorrow, but soon.”  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
Week seven was the breakthrough.

Suvi sat working, she’d requested reports from the Nexus science team to run through, she wanted to at least keep her hand in. Robyn sat at the kitchen table, trying to write. She wasn’t sure if this was positive or not, Robyn seemed to weave from frustration to euphoric calm on a whim when she had a pen in her hand. It was progress though, they could have a conversation, Robyn’s sense of humour was starting to show through, small fragments of the woman she once was tentatively raising their head above the parapet. 

“Hey, anyone home?” Peebee’s head appeared round the door.  
Suvi jumped up, “what, I had no idea you were coming!”  
“Oh” Peebee looked awkwardly between Suvi and Robyn.

Robyn stood up and smiled, “I asked her to come” her hand went to the back of her neck, Suvi ticked off another Harris quirk, “I need your help Peebee.”  
Suvi couldn’t quite believe her ears, at no point had Robyn even been able to acknowledge there was an issue or that she needed support, as far as Suvi was aware she hadn’t willingly made contact with another soul since arriving. This was progress.

“Okay, come on then Harris, let’s go play.”

The pair sat in a small hollow away from the Cabin, low enough to keep them out of the prevailing wind, but still with enough of a view over Meridian.  
Robyn didn’t really know where to start, she felt uncomfortable and frustrated but knew she had to make progress. “I, well, what did she do to me Peebee? Why am I so fucked up?”

Peebee sighed, she spoke carefully, not wanting to trigger the Lieutenant.

“Asari melds are supposed to be consensual, you both reach out to find your joint space in the universe, it’s not really about being physically in each other’s heads. At the very least the Asari side is supposed to ask permission. Kendra forced herself onto you, without your consent she was fumbling in the dark looking for what she wanted and she wasn’t gentle.”

“I feel so pathetic Peebee” Robyn whispered, “it’s like everything is out of order, I can’t remember stuff or it’s been twisted, I don’t know how to react to things because the connections between the input and the output are tangled.”

“What did you do to fight her?” Peebee needed to understand where the blockade had started.

Robyn shook her head, “I just started reciting things, the periodic table, equations, theories, complicated arithmetic.”   
“Okay, so you’ve fortified yourself behind facts, we need to give you a new, positive stimulus to jump start you back into action, your conscious mind is ready to move on but your unconscious mind is still terrified.”

“I don’t know what to do, I don’t trust myself not to end up somewhere really dark.”  
“You won’t be on your own Robyn, jump tandem with me?”   
Robyn nodded.

“Lie back” Peebee lay next to Robyn, the dip of the ground cocooning them, she laced her fingers in the Lieutenants. “Close your eyes and focus on the heat of the sun warming your face, listen to the flow of the air through the trees, really hear it.”

As Peebee spoke, describing all the minute details of their surroundings she let her mind empty and gently caress the edge of Robyn. She felt a flinch of tension but then a subtle shift. Robyn focused on Peebee’s words until she realised she was hearing them from the inside out, Peebee’s careful embrace of her fragile state a welcome intervention.

Peebee kept herself calm despite feeling the hydra that patrolled Robyn’s thoughts, her mind was like an apocalyptic landscape, a decimated forest, stumps of memories stood exposed but the ground was a chaotic mess of scattered branches and bare earth.

Glimmers shone through as Peebee started to pull back the layers, tearing at the ivy which suffocated new growth, she felt the pressure from within Robyn’s yearning to break free, the exhausting effort she was putting in to fight her demons. She felt the desperate need Robyn had to reach Suvi, how she knew the longer this went on the further away she slipped.

Peebee clung onto those parts of Robyn, she dragged them as hard as she could, kicking and screaming into the light, it started as a drop, the steady dripping forming a trickle, then a babbling brook until Peebee felt herself enveloped in a tidal wave of relief.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Peebee lay on her side tracing gentle patterns on the Lieutenant’s forehead, “hey tiger.”  
“Hey” Robyn muttered sleepily, “so that’s what it’s supposed to feel like.”

Peebee smiled, “there are different kinds of melds for different situations, but yeah all of them should leave you feeling warm and fuzzy.”

“You’re lucky you’re able to have that kind of connection, that intimacy with someone, kinda jealous of your superior evolution” Robyn gave a half smile.

Peebee got to her feet and helped Robyn to hers, “we didn’t meld, me and Suvi.”  
Robyn shook her head, “I didn’t mean it like…”

“I know” Peebee cut across, “but just in case you ever wondered, it was always you.” Peebee bit her lip, her voice no more than a whisper, “and after what I’ve just felt, she was right to hold onto that, you humans really know how to do the whole ‘loving with every part of me’ thing.”

Robyn blushed, “Peebee, I know what you just did was a big deal, it means a lot to me that you came, that you helped.”  
Peebee pulled Robyn into a tight hug, “don’t sweat it Harris, just get better okay.”

The pair walked back to the Cabin, Robyn feeling better than she had in months, she grinned at Suvi as she flopped onto the sofa and was out like a light in seconds. Suvi moved over so Peebee had somewhere to sit.

“What did you do to knock her out?” Suvi chuckled.

“Oh, just rearranged a few boxes, knocked down a few walls” Peebee tapped her temple, her tone became serious, “Suvi, I know how hard this must be for you, to be locked in the middle of nowhere with her, not knowing what each day is going to bring, even if you hadn’t been through so much already, you’d be allowed to have doubts.”

Peebee watched carefully as Suvi shifted uncomfortably, not quite able to hold the Asari’s gaze, “just hold out a little longer okay, she practically steamrollered me with her will to get to you, she’s working so hard to fight against herself so she can reconnect.”

Suvi fiddled with the hem of her sleeve, “I know, every time I look at her I see the war going on inside her, I can feel her frustration, I just feel so hopeless, nothing I do or say makes a difference.”

Peebee took Suvi’s hands in hers, “yes it does, she has meticulously catalogued every tiny detail Suvi, that hand on her chest to ground her after she woke up screaming, it’s there, the mug of tea sat on her bedside table each morning, it makes her feel normal. All of it Suvi, she values all of it, even if she can’t tell you quite how much yet.”

Suvi looked at Robyn, sprawled out, relaxed, peaceful, she couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen her like that, “she’s on her way home” Peebee whispered.  
\------------------------------------------------------------  
Week eight saw the change. The first person to notice was the Angaran tech on duty at the Relay. Since it’s completion Evfra had insisted a member of the build team remained on site, Robyn could communicate with the structure directly from her terminal.

The inter galaxy relay wasn’t the traditional system relay design. A standard relay requires you to enter between zero and ninety degrees the mass effect fields then eject the object sideways along it’s length. 

Robyn’s design had a main support ring with two interwoven rings mounted inside. With the longer distance the interwoven rings rotated, generating the mass effect field, the ship then entered with its own field at the exact moment of asynchronisation. The combined effect disrupted the standing wave catapulting the ship through space.

When Robyn woke up, at first, she couldn’t explain what was different, then she realised she was calm, her mind was empty, it was as if someone had simply dissolved everything else that had filled her brain.

Silently she slipped out of bed, it was before dawn but she felt wide awake and invigorated. Stood downstairs she looked around the space as if seeing it for the first time, the whole place reeked of frustration, so she cleaned.

Every surface disinfected, the piles of books and datapads ordered, the cushions on the sofa plumped, the sorry looking fruit in the bowl went in the bin, she opened the windows letting the first rays of sunlight caste their pale pink glow over the walls.

The bathroom got the same treatment as she showered she inspected her body, her scars had faded but her body she almost didn’t recognise, she didn’t chastise herself too much for falling out of shape but being strong and fit made her feel good.

Pulling on a white t-shirt and jeans she padded barefoot to the kitchen brewing some coffee, then she sat down at the kitchen table and started to work.

At first she felt disjointed, like she couldn’t understand her own train of thought, but as she perservered the veil was lifted and a familiar flutter of excitement filled her.

She opened the link to the relay and entered the command sequence to initialise startup. It would gradually powerup each system going through a full commissioning and diagnostic sequence.

The Angaran technician was shocked out of his slumber by the sudden illumination of the relay, his monitors and terminals awash with data streams and outstation feedback.   
Robyn left the programme running, her team knew what to do, they’d feed a steady flow of reports to her throughout the start-up period, all in all it should take three or four days.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi climbed downstairs sleepily, she found Robyn at the kitchen table working, she watched for a moment, taking in the scene, Robyn looked renewed, her eyes held their mischievous glint.

Robyn looked up and ran her hand through her still damp hair, she smiled at Suvi. Dr Anwar stepped towards her, settling on Robyn’s lap and felt those beautiful arms wrap around her.

“I haven’t seen that smile in a while” she said, raising a hand to Robyn’s cheek, tracing her hairline around her ear and letting her fingers twist into the hair at the base of Robyn’s neck. She almost sighed with the familiar satisfaction.

Robyn felt the goose bumps break out at Suvi’s touch, “thank you, for being so patient.” Robyn could hardly get the words out, she struggled to find the right combination to articulate just how much the woman sat on her knee meant to her.

“Robyn” Suvi whispered, “death and six hundred years of dark space couldn’t separate us, this is nothing.”  
“You know it’s not over?”  
“They’ll always be challenges Ro, we face them together.”  
“Kiss me?” Robyn breathed, Suvi didn’t hesitate in her reply.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi wrapped her arms around Robyn’s back as she worked at her terminal, it was early evening. Their days had taken on a new rhythm, they started to build again, laughter filled the space, they were finding each other.

“What you working on?” Suvi asked, trying to follow the numbers on screen. 

“The final reports from the relay, it’s all up and running, ready to ping.” Robyn replied, her fingers still working the keys, she turned her head to kiss Suvi’s cheek.  
“Ping?”

“Basically, we call and wait to see if we get an answer, relays work in pairs so assuming we won the war, my research survived, someone interpreted it correctly and actually put the effort to build the bloody thing, then when we say ‘hello’ it should respond.”

“That’s a lot of ‘what if’s’.”

Robyn nodded, “yup, but we don’t know until we try” she shrugged under Suvi’s embrace, “I don’t really know how long it’ll take to get a reply, the signal could be distorted or lost covering that kind of distance.”

“So, we wait?” Suvi snuggled a little tighter into Robyn’s neck.  
“The best part of sciencing is the waiting.” Robyn grinned.  
“True, otherwise we’d never have the time to drink tea” Suvi giggled.  
“Are you ready to wave to the Milky Way Dr Anwar?” Robyn guided the first finger of Suvi’s right hand to the execute key.  
Suvi held her breath as she gave it a firm tap, she couldn’t help but laugh, “is it sad I get a little buzz of excitement from stuff like that?”  
Robyn grinned, “hell no! Science is the best.”  
Suvi ruffled the Lieutenant’s hair, “I’m going for a shower.”  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn sat on the end of the bed, pulling off her jeans, she could already feel her legs starting to stiffen from her run earlier in the day. She’d felt heavy footed and her chest had been tight by the time she finished the 7km loop, but it was a start.

Suvi, wrapped in a towel handed her a small bottle and smiled, “if I ask nicely?” She said lying on her front and pulling a pillow down the bed to rest her head on.

“You don’t even need to ask” Robyn replied, she carefully pulled down Suvi’s towel to expose her back, squeezing out a little oil to warm in her hands, the Lieutenant straddled Suvi across her upper legs and lost herself in the methodical process of easing the tension in Suvi’s shoulders.

Suvi closed her eyes and melted into her lover’s hands, the feeling of strong fingers manipulating her muscles into submission the contrast in strength and tenderness.

After a time, “I’d love to carry on but I’ve lost the circulation to my feet” Robyn muttered, as she bent forward kissing Suvi’s neck. The Lieutenant supported her weight on her arms as she unfurled her stiff legs, stretching them out behind her. Suvi turned over underneath her, Robyn nearly crumbled. 

The sight of Suvi so relaxed, elongated and elegant, so comfortable despite her exposure made Robyn’s heart jump in her throat. Suvi revelled under her scrutiny, she loved the way Robyn looked at her, she loved seeing the desire, she loved breaking through the barrier which contained it, letting it free.

She felt Robyn’s breath catch as she ran a hand down the Lieutenants side, she could feel the muscles tremble and not just with the effort of holding her position. 

Robyn could feel Suvi almost purr underneath her, she closed her eyes letting the grip of Suvi’s fingers in her hair send a wave of wanting through her. When she opened them again Suvi held her gaze as she pulled Robyn to her, and in that moment, like the pings of the relays flying through dark space, Suvi called and Robyn answered.


	21. Nothing Less

Robyn kicked out the tangle of sheets as Suvi worked her way back up the bed, she nuzzled into Robyn’s side, resting a hand on her chest, feeling the slowing of the Lieutenant’s heart, the soft sheen of sweat making her skin glow.

The Lieutenant tasted herself in Suvi’s kiss, this addition to their morning routine was one both women were very much enjoying.  
“You’re too good to me” Robyn whispered as she steadied her breathing, Suvi just grinned.

A moment later Robyn’s omni-tool buzzed, she lazily pulled open the screen. Suvi felt the heart beneath her hand quicken, she looked up trying to read the look on Robyn’s face.  
Robyn looked down and grinned, “We got an answer.”  
Suvi propped herself up her eyes wide in shock, “no way?”  
Robyn just grinned and nodded.

“It actually worked, not that I doubted you Lieutenant but you have to admit the odds were pretty long even for you.”

Robyn raised herself up still grinning and kissed Suvi, gently guiding her onto her back. The Lieutenant lay soft kisses along the length of Dr Anwar’s neck and smiled to herself as she felt the subtle shift in the body beneath her.

“Robyn” Suvi gasped, “what are you doing?” not that she wanted to halt the progress of the Lieutenant’s lips as they trailed across her body.

Robyn spoke between kisses, occasionally letting her teeth catch the skin of sensitive spots, “I’m demonstrating, that nothing, not even a scientific breakthrough that will define the development of all sentient life across the entire universe… ” Robyn let her tongue tease the crease where leg meets body, enjoying the view of Suvi, her bottom lip between her teeth, “…comes before the pleasure of Dr Suvi Anwar.”

Suvi didn’t attempt to quell herself as Robyn’s hot mouth landed on her, she let her back arch. It was worth it, she thought, all of it, the hurt, the loss, every dark moment was worth it for this, to feel so wanted, to feel so loved.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
The pair walked hand in hand up the ramp of the Tempest, it was a strange feeling being back on the ship, Robyn sensed a shift in Suvi, she squeezed her hand, “you okay?”

Suvi turned to her, it was probably the last moment they’d have alone, “I haven’t thought about the Tempest once since we left, I’ve thought about Kallo and the rest of the team but” she hesitated, “I don’t know if I want this anymore.”

Robyn studied her closely, “I’m pretty sure you can do ground breaking science anywhere you choose.”  
Suvi nodded, “that’s the conclusion I’ve come to too.”

“Are you two just going to stand there or do we get to jump some time today?” Sara yelled across the cargo bay.

The pair grinned at one another “come on” Robyn said, pulling Suvi’s hand.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn sat on the step beside Kallo checking and rechecking her terminal, syncing the Tempest with the Relay and making sure the call signs were triggering properly.

The Bridge was crowded all the entire Tempest crew had congregated, nervous excitement making the air buzz. Evfra had also come aboard, his usual nonchalance replaced with almost childlike eagerness.

“We’re here” Kallo stated as the Tempest came to a stop at the build site.  
Robyn stood up taking in the view, seeing the physical construction of her work was almost overwhelming. 

“What happens now?” Scott asked.  
“We call Adiona” Robyn replied.

Robyn looked around the room, she met Sara’s gaze, “Pathfinder, would you do the honours?” she said, gesturing to the navigation station as she returned to her seat.

“What do I do?” Sara asked.  
“The galaxy map has been updated” Robyn smiled.

Ryder brought up the map, homing in on their current system, a new nav-point glowed against the screen, the whole room held their breath as they watched Sara select the flashing beacon of ‘Milky Way.’

Kallo spoke, “co-ordinates inputted, communication with the Relay is open, jump sequence has been initiated.”

Robyn’s fingers flew over the screen, “the Relay has synced with our call sign, mass effect field generators have been brought online.”

The two inner rings of the Relay started to rotate, their momentum building with each revolution the mass effect field becoming bigger and bigger as the standing waves formed, the bright blue whirlpool a mesmerising sight.

“Relay field at full power and stable.” Robyn reported.  
“Tempest’s field configuring” Kallo replied, the ship shuddered as the drive core primed.  
“Asynchronous moment locked.” Robyn put down her terminal, “well we’re ready, all systems are green.”

Evfra moved forward, “I’ve never seen anything like it” he whispered.  
Robyn rose to stand by his side, “what happens next is going to blow your mind” she said with a grin.

Robyn nodded to Sara.

“Kallo” Ryder started, “take us through.”  
“Aye Aye Pathfinder, hitting the Relay in 3, 2, 1.”

Everyone tensed, Evfra grabbed Robyn’s hand as the Tempest shot forward, with a brilliant flash of blue the two mass effect fields met and the world condensed around them in a blur of light.

Almost as soon as it had started, five maybe seven seconds and it was over, the Tempest came to a shuddering halt.

Robyn released Evfra’s hand and walked to the navigation station, staring out into space. She couldn’t stop the tears which had started to form, she turned around and saw the same look of total disbelief on each of her team mates, “it fucking worked” she whispered, “it actually fucking worked.”

Scott was the first to go, his laughter contagious, soon everyone was doubled over releasing the tension they’d been holding, not quite believing what they’d just done.

“Kallo, where are we?” Cora asked.  
“We appear to be in the Viper Nebula, we’ve been sent a nav-point and docking clearance from the Isla, an Asari registered command vessel stationed nearby.”  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
Robyn stood next to Sara at the Tempest’s airlock.   
“Can you believe what just happened?” Sara grinned at her.

Robyn shook her head, “I’m just a dreamer Sara, that’s all science is, dreaming and having the belief that there is a way to make it happen.”  
The airlock turned green.

The pair walked carefully, side by side along the access corridor, they could hear the steady footsteps of someone walking towards them, Robyn let her smile broaden as the unmistakable figure of Dr Liara T’Soni rounded the corner ahead of them.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Suvi Anwar powered down her terminal and put her papers in order, gathering her things she exited and locked her lab, nodding her goodbye to colleagues as she left the building. She strode across the leafy quads towards the teaching facilities, enjoying the feeling of the spring sun on her face.

She silently slipped into the darkness of the auditorium, finding an empty seat at the back, Robyn didn’t break her flow but the momentary flash of a smile told Suvi she knew she was there.

Suvi loved watching Robyn teach, she was an engaging lecturer, challenging her students to think beyond what they thought possible, she possessed an ability to explain the complexities of physics with elegance and simplicity, making accessible.

Despite being dressed in jeans and a t-shirt as Robyn brought her class to a close the Alliance sponsored students in the audience stood and saluted, which Robyn dutifully returned.

As the students packed up Suvi walked down to the front, placing a hand on Robyn’s shoulder, she pretended not to notice the despondent looks of several of the students whose attention Robyn had grabbed far beyond physics.

“Did you have to break their hearts on a Friday, Dr. Anwar” Robyn grinned, before kissing Suvi’s cheek.

Robyn straightened up just catching her class before they left, “remember your assignment is due no later than 0900 on Tuesday” she called, “make sure you send it to the correct mailbox, I am not Dr Anwar, and my wife cares little about what you have to say on thrust conditioning” she cautioned.

“Ready to go?” Suvi asked.  
Robyn took a deep breath, “I think so.”  
\------------------------------------------------------------------  
The transit to Earth was hassle free, the Alliance frigate and shuttle drop off efficient as always, Robyn hardly ever wore her uniform but being on the Alliance payroll had its perks. 

Suvi always found herself smiling whenever a marine approached Robyn, she didn’t think she’d ever tire of hearing her addressed as ‘Captain Anwar’. Even she had to admit it was weird travelling through the ‘Harris Relay’ though.

As the shuttle left the ground the pair pulled their coats tighter, it was one of the few clear days of winter, but the wind still bit their faces as it blew off the Atlantic. With hands buried in pockets, they walked from the landing pad towards the village.

Despite the centuries that had passed the squalls still carried a familiar scent, and sang the same song in Robyn’s ears. She was surprised to find the dirt path on the South side of the village still existed, she’d walked along it hundreds of times from home to school and back.

Cresting the ridge of the headland Robyn paused to take in the familiar horizon, Suvi linking her arm through hers. “I can’t believe you grew up here” she said, “it’s beautiful but so wild.”

“The storms would shake the house, some days the waves on the cliffs would sound like bombs and before they put up the shield defences you’d often hear the rock falls thundering into the sea.” Robyn smiled, the only thing that was missing from the view was her home, she hadn’t expected it to still be standing though.

Arm in arm they continued to walk along the path, eventually coming to a stone sculpture surrounded by simple wooden benches, Robyn’s brow furrowed, she pulled away from Suvi and inspected the huge block of slate which felt permanently damp from the salt in the air.

Robyn let her fingers follow the intricate carvings of Greek lettering and mathematical symbols. The smoothness of the stone contrasting with the sharp edges of each figure.  
“What does it say?” Suvi asked, she’d hung back, watching Robyn carefully.

“It’s an expansion of Schrodinger’s wave equation, calculating the probability of the location of a particle at a particular moment in time.” Robyn felt herself go light headed, “I came home on leave during my second year in the Alliance, I was struggling, me and Dad would walk on the beach each morning and he’d make me write this out over and over again in the sand until I got it right.”

Suvi moved around the stone, a small plaque on one side, “it’s a memorial” she stated, “to those lost in the Reaper Conflict, to you. Your parents placed it here when they returned to find the house destroyed, they turned the school into a field hospital during the war.”

Robyn’s vision blurred, it felt like a lifetime ago that she’d found out about the Reapers, that she’d known what was coming and chosen to take up arms, that she’d said goodbye to Suvi.

Her thoughts were punctured by Suvi’s laughter, Robyn looked up she could see the tears rolling down her wife’s face. Robyn stood up and walked to Suvi’s side, at the very bottom of the slab was a tiny inscription, in a language Robyn didn’t recognise.

Robyn raised a questioning eyebrow.

“Oh Robyn” Suvi laughed, “your parent’s didn’t believe you’d died.”  
“What?”

“It’s in Gaelic, it says ‘She was a Physicist, not a bumbling Chemist!’”  
Robyn chuckled and sighed, shaking her head, “my Mother always did have a strange sense of humour.”  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
The pair stood silently on the cliff edge watching the sets of swell beat their powerful rhythm against the coastline.  
“  
Thank you” Robyn said simply, staring at the horizon, “for everything.”

Suvi entwined her fingers in Robyn’s, “forever Robyn, nothing less.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A massive 'thank you' to everyone who has taken the time to get in touch, as someone who feels like they're stumbling in the dark when it comes to writing, your support has been so very much appreciated and it is truly humbling to know that I managed to craft a plot and character that kept you coming back for another chapter.
> 
> Kudos as always to Bioware and the very talented team who created the characters and universe, locations and lore which gave me a framework to build upon.
> 
> I'm going to miss having this pair in my head.


End file.
